It's not even as bad as that, actually. I just catch myself holding my books a little closer to my face sometimes, or squinting if I'm trying to read something all the way across the room, or closing one eye to clear things up. The closing one eye thing is really strange to me because it doesn't seem to matter which one I shut... Either helps. O.o So apparently I have ... symmetrical sight degeneration? I don't know.
Anyway, I can still pass an eye test for driving with total ease, so I'm not overly worried about it just yet.
Hm. I was a lot younger than middle school-aged the first time I wondered something like that. But it was probably around middle school that I realized that while I wouldn't do that because it could hurt other people, those other people wouldn't do it because they might hurt themselves. I think I'm still a little shaky on the concept, actually. hahaha I was a volunteer firefighter for a while. I'm prone to going outside (sometimes barefoot) in the middle of the night to investigate strange noises when my parents are away in Virginia. I've chased bears off my front porch... Yeah, I'm really not very careful with myself
( ... )
I still wonder about the human instinct for self-preservation and how far it goes. Sometimes the boundary seems terribly thin.
I remember sitting on a rough stone wall on the Greek island of Hydra, looking out at the slate-grey waves and down at the water frothing between the rocks. I was fourteen, and I had a wild, almost overpowering urge to jump - or rather just to let myself overbalance and fall. I didn't understand it. I didn't want to die, and I was terrified at the idea of my body breaking on those rocks, but I had to climb off the wall because I was so afraid I would do it without meaning or wanting to.
I remember very clearly the day I realised that mortality existed. I can't remember my age, but I must have been quite young. I was waving goodbye to my mum out of the kitchen window in our flat. And suddenly it hit me, for the first time ever, that it was possible for her not to return.
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I remember thinking this is what it must be like to be a television and have the "focus" and "sharpness" knobs turned way up.
This was what it was like to see for the first time.
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Reposted for formatting. Sigh.
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Anyway, I can still pass an eye test for driving with total ease, so I'm not overly worried about it just yet.
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I remember sitting on a rough stone wall on the Greek island of Hydra, looking out at the slate-grey waves and down at the water frothing between the rocks. I was fourteen, and I had a wild, almost overpowering urge to jump - or rather just to let myself overbalance and fall. I didn't understand it. I didn't want to die, and I was terrified at the idea of my body breaking on those rocks, but I had to climb off the wall because I was so afraid I would do it without meaning or wanting to.
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