Luke/Reid Fic: "Found," 8/?
Next chapter of my fix-it fic. Thanks again to the awesome mcfeste for the beta and cheerleading!
Ratings vary per chapter, but will go up to NC-17.
Part one
Part two
Part three
Part four
Part five
Part six
Part seven
The moment of grace before Luke remembers lasts only a few fleeting seconds as he wakes. His stomach clenches as the dread fills him, and he shivers and curls inward, drawing up his knees, keeping his eyes squeezed shut.
A moment later Reid is wrapped around him, his lips soft and warm on the back of Luke’s neck. Reid sounds as if he’s been awake for a while. “Hey.”
Luke opens his eyes reluctantly. He just wants to go back to sleep, and slip into dreams where Reid is going to live forever. He says nothing, and lets Reid roll him onto his back. Reid props himself up on his elbow and gazes down. He caresses Luke’s chest lightly before his fingers wrap around and trace Luke’s scar. “Feeling okay? You’re a little pale.”
“I’m fine.” Luke’s response is automatic.
Reid frowns. “Does it hurt?” He slides his hand down between Luke’s legs and touches Luke’s hole gently. “I know it’s been a long time.”
His ass is tender, but Luke shakes his head. “No. I mean, it does, a little. But I like it. It’s like…I can still feel you inside me.” He wants to hold onto this feeling forever, even if it is pain.
Reid kisses him softly. “As long as it wasn’t too much.” His fingers remain at Luke’s hole, not moving, just there. It’s intimate in a way that makes Luke feel safe and loved and special.
“It could never be too much with you. I want…everything.”
They kiss again slowly, breathing each other in. Reid’s fingers move a bit and then he’s cupping Luke’s balls, kneading them together in his palm. Luke groans into Reid’s mouth as his body starts to come to life. Reid seems to know exactly where to touch, and as he moves down and begins sucking Luke’s nipples in turn, Luke moans.
As Reid takes Luke’s cock in hand, he smiles. “I used to imagine what you’d be like in bed. What you’d sound like.”
Luke can only take a shuddering breath in response.
“Even when I was still desperately trying to get out of Oakdale, I couldn’t stop thinking about you.” He strokes Luke harder, his thumb flicking over the head of Luke’s cock. “I’d lie there in bed at night, thinking about how annoying you were, and then I’d jerk off and imagine you under me, moaning like this. Saying my name.”
“Reid. Reid.” The pleasure simmers, spreading out from Luke’s cock and warming his limbs.
“Just like that. I’d think about fucking your ass, about your lips wrapped around my dick. I’d even use my own fingers sometimes and imagine you inside me.” Reid smiles at Luke’s breathy moan. “And it’s been a long time since I’ve let anyone do that. But you want to know what I thought about most of all?”
Luke can only nod, his hips lifting as Reid strokes him.
“I imagined what it would be like to suck your cock.” With that, he descends and swallows Luke deeply.
Everything else - the worry, the fear, everything - fades away as Reid’s tongue does the most amazing things Luke’s ever felt. Reid’s hand is wrapped around the base of Luke’s cock, and he twists it in time with the motion of his tongue and the movement of his head up and down, taking Luke deeper and deeper.
Luke grasps at Reid’s short hair, barely able to get a grip, but eager to touch him. He bucks up into Reid’s mouth, all self control vanished as Reid licks and sucks him. The warm moisture is so tight all around him, and Luke moans loudly, his cries echoing in the rafters.
When Reid fondles Luke’s balls again, Luke comes in a sudden rush of bliss, shaking as he empties into Reid’s mouth and right down his throat. It drips out of Reid’s lips as he swallows, milking Luke until the shudders of ecstasy ebb. Reid lets Luke slip from his mouth, and Luke hauls him up, kissing him deeply.
Tasting himself all over Reid’s mouth, he strokes Reid’s tongue as he reaches down for Reid’s cock, which is leaking and hard. Pulling away reluctantly from Reid’s mouth, Luke smiles. “My turn.”
After rolling Reid onto his back, Luke shimmies down and takes him in deeply. Reid groans and holds Luke’s head, making little noises in his throat. He doesn’t last long, and as he floods Luke’s mouth, Luke swallows every drop. He loves the musky tang, and licks his lips as he rests his head on Reid’s belly.
Reid caresses Luke’s hair softly. “It’s even better than I thought. At least we got to do this,” he murmurs.
Luke pulls away and rolls to the side of the bed, the tension returned in an instant. “It was the first time, and you’re already talking like it’s the last.”
Reid touches Luke’s back. “I didn’t mean it like that.” He squeezes Luke’s shoulder. “Listen, there’s something else I should tell you.”
Nausea blooms in Luke’s stomach. “What?” Oh, God. Oh, God. He looks over his shoulder as Reid moves to sit beside him on the side of the bed.
“It’s okay.” Reid rubs Luke’s thigh. “It’s just that I’m finding there are some…gaps in my memories.”
“Gaps?”
“I’ll think about what I’d do to remove, say, an oligodendroglioma, and my mind will just be blank. So I’ll look it up, and once I read the procedure, it all comes back to me. But sometimes I forget again. And I can’t forget these things. Not if I want to be the doctor I was, Luke. I don’t know if I can be.”
“So you’ll keep reading and rereading until you remember. It’s normal, isn’t it? After trauma? It’ll take time.”
Reid’s small smile is rueful. “Nothing about this is normal. Maybe you’re right, but the thing with time is…”
That theirs might be ticking away. Luke stands, stepping away from Reid’s outstretched hand. “I’m not giving up.”
“Neither am I, Luke. I’m just being practical. I’m not throwing in the towel, but we have to manage our expectations.”
Luke doesn’t respond, and he doesn’t exhale the breath lodged in his throat until the bathroom door is safely closed behind him. He feels dizzy from the conflicting emotions coursing through him. Making love to Reid is the most incredible thing he’s ever experienced, but his hands are clammy with fear at the thought of it all disappearing tomorrow. Today. Any second now.
He fills his glass and lines up his pills, swallowing each one like he’s supposed to. All for nothing.
The force of his throw shatters what’s left of the glass on the tiled floor, little pieces of blue shards scattering in every direction. A moment later Reid flings open the door without knocking. He’s still naked, and he stares between the floor and Luke with concern.
“I’m fine. It just slipped.”
“Don’t move. You’re going to cut yourself.”
Luke gazes around, realizing he’s completely surrounded by the jagged remains of his glass. A little piece of what used to be a fish rests by his toe, and he nudges it.
“Don’t move. I’ll get you a pair of shoes and then we’ll clean this up.”
Reid disappears, and Luke can hear him rummaging around in the closet. He thinks of the bottles that once hid there, and closes his eyes as the longing takes hold.
*
As he rides the elevator up to Invicta’s local branch, housed in an office complex in a suburb just outside of Chicago, Luke straightens his tie. His suit is crisp and clean, and doesn’t hang off him too badly thanks to all of Damian’s cooking. He hasn’t worn a suit or his long overcoat since the night they found Reid, and he can still smell Reid in the wool. He closes his eyes for a moment, remembering the darkness of the trunk, and Reid trembling in his arms.
There’s a soft bing as the doors slide open on the fourteenth floor. He’d told Reid he had to attend a foundation board meeting, and Reid had kissed him goodbye and assured him he’d be all right alone for a few hours. Then he kissed Luke again, and asked him to drop by the drug store on his way home for lube. It was the first place Luke stopped on his drive to Chicago, and five tubes sit in a brown paper bag in the passenger seat of his car.
The young brunette receptionist looks up as he opens the frosted-glass door with Invicta Corporation written on it in bold, blocky letters. “Good afternoon, sir.” She smiles, showing a row of neat, bright teeth. “How can I help you?”
“I’m here to see Mona Cross.”
The receptionist peers down at what he assumes is her calendar. Luke can’t see over the raised front of her gleaming wood and glass desk. She frowns slightly. “I don’t see any one o’clock appointments for Ms. Cross. May I ask your name?”
“She’s expecting me.”
The young woman glances to her left, which tells Luke which direction to go in search of Mona’s office. What would Damian do? As Luke strides by her desk and down the serene and low-lit hallway, the receptionist squeaks. “Sir! Excuse me!”
With a deep breath, Luke stops himself from breaking into a run. He rounds a corner and continues, eyes scanning the silver nameplates on office doors, hoping he’ll find Mona’s soon. He can hear the receptionist in pursuit, her heels muffled by the carpet, but still audible as she speeds after him, stage whispering, “Sir!”
Then the right words appear. Mona Cross. Luke opens the door to the small, dark-hued room that holds a desk and two guest chairs and a row of filing cabinets. Mona practically leaps out of her seat when she sees him in the doorway, her eyes widening.
The agitated receptionist huffs at Luke’s heels. “I’m so sorry, ma’am. He just barged right in. Should I call security?”
Mona clears her throat. “No, Louisa. Thank you. I forgot to tell you Mr. Snyder was coming. My apologies.”
Luke glances over his shoulder as he shuts the door, smiling brightly. Louisa appears skeptical, but turns with a little shrug and heads back in the direction of her post. Luke smiles at Mona in what he hopes is a calm and intimidating manner. “You really should have been expecting me. Just be glad I didn’t bring my father.”
Mona smiles tightly and sits behind her desk. “Oh, his presence has certainly been felt at other offices, from what I understand.”
Luke’s smile is real this time. “Good.” Without being asked, he takes a seat across from Mona. “Well, you know why I’m here.”
“How is he?”
This question takes Luke off guard. He hesitates.
“Believe it or not, I only wish Dr. Oliver well. Is he recovering?”
“How can you sit there and pretend to be concerned for his well-being?” Luke leans forward in his chair. “I know you had something to do with this. With what happened to him. So tell me. Everything.”
“I’m not directly involved with Lazarus.”
“But you are involved in some way. You have to be, or else how would they have even known about Reid? How would they have gotten to him so quickly?”
She sighs. “It’s true that I added his name to the list of candidates. But that’s all.”
“Candidates?”
“Yes. People who might make appropriate test subjects due to their strong mental abilities. Reid Oliver was…is a genius. His brain is capable of much higher functioning than the average person. This made him a potential candidate. That’s all. It was just luck he was hit by that train.”
Luke has to swallow hard over the rage. “Luck?”
She actually looks chastened. “I meant for the project. The circumstances simply presented themselves. We didn’t have anything to do with Dr. Oliver’s death. That’s not how the project works. Mr. Snyder, we’re trying to help people. Do you know how many lives could be saved if we’re able to perfect this technology and these procedures?”
“You stole his body. You kept him strapped down to a gurney, gagged and helpless. You tortured him with tests and procedures that he can’t talk about because they were so fucking excruciating.”
Mona’s expression is pained. “I’m very sorry to hear that he suffered. I assure you that was never the intent!”
“Well, you know what they say about the road to hell, Ms. Cross.”
“Indeed. I do know that it was never expected for him to regain such a level of consciousness.”
“What do you mean?” Luke wants to turn her upside down and shake all her secrets onto the plush carpet.
“The other subjects, they were little more than vegetables when they were revived. Yet Dr. Oliver could speak; he could think. It was most unexpected.”
“And he could feel. Which none of you seemed to give a damn about.”
“I truly am sorry for his suffering, and I’m sure it was unintended. As I told you, I’m not involved in that level of the project, but you have to understand that medical research is very complicated. To make important discoveries, sacrifices must be made.”
Luke tightens his jaw, resisting the urge to lunge across the expanse of wood between them and strangle her. “Gotta break a few eggs to make an omelette, is that it?”
“Any suffering is truly regrettable.”
“Regrettable.” His fingernails dig into his palms.
She leans forward. “Don’t you see what an amazing step this is? The heart, it’s still functioning properly?”
Leery, Luke nods.
“It seems to have worked. It actually worked.”
“What did? What is it? Tell me!”
“I don’t know all the details; it’s far too scientific for me to understand. I’m an administrator, Mr. Snyder. But I know the heart is a hybrid.”
“Hybrid?” Luke’s own heart thumps in his chest.
“Part machine, part human. The other subjects, they all suffered serious organ damage and were given hybrid transplants. But the key is all in the brain. Once they were able to regenerate Dr. Oliver’s brain, they operated on one particular part of it. I don’t know what it’s called, but by adjusting something there, they were able to trick the body into accepting the new heart.”
Luke’s mind spins. “That’s why he doesn’t need to take anti-rejection meds.” The hope wells in his chest. Reid will be okay. He’s not like the others. He’s special. He’s different.
“Exactly! It’s an incredible leap forward in our research. These hybrid organs could save millions of lives.” Her eyes are bright. “Trillions!”
“But everyone else is dead, aren’t they?”
Her fervour diminishes considerably, and she sighs. “Unfortunately, yes. Dr. Oliver’s case is remarkable. They don’t know if they can ever duplicate these results. His recovery has been nothing short of miraculous.”
Luke prays to anyone who is listening, with everything he has, that she’s right. He has to live. “You’re right. It has been miraculous. And you are never, ever going to hurt him again. Invicta is going to stay far away from him. Do you understand me?”
“We wish him no harm, Mr. Snyder. In fact, his survival is vital to the continuation of the project. If we could monitor him-”
Luke stands and leans forward on the desk. “If anyone from Invicta contacts Reid, or attempts to come within fifty miles of him, it’ll be the last thing they ever do. And I’ll hold you personally responsible. Do you understand?”
She jerks her head in a nod. “Your father and his…associates have made the potential consequences extremely clear. Mr. Snyder, I hope…”
“Yes?”
“I sincerely hope you and Dr. Oliver make the most of this second chance. So few of us get them in life.”
After a moment, Luke nods, and turns his back on Mona Cross, leaving her and Invicta behind as he marches from the office. He feels Louisa’s eyes on him as he exits the lobby, but he doesn’t look back.
In his car, Luke breathes in and out slowly. Then he opens the paper bag sitting on the cold leather beside him, and pulls out the half-empty bottle. Just one last sip. The metal cap twists off easily, and he takes a gulp, the sweet burn of the vodka soothing him.
He hasn’t finished swallowing before the terrible shame returns, and he hates himself utterly for his revolting, pathetic weakness. His fingers grapple clumsily with the door handle, and then he’s pouring out the rest of the bottle into the slush of the parking lot. He can barely breathe as he watches it soak into the snow, and wants to throw himself onto his knees and scoop it up with his hands.
Instead he closes the door and turns the key in the ignition. Reid is waiting.
*
The sun is setting as Luke returns home. He’d driven slowly and stopped at a roadside diner for a huge plate of food to try and soak up some of the alcohol. In front of his house, Luke turns off the car and gazes at his reflection in the rear-view mirror. He fixes his hair and chews on another mint.
Inside, Reid is indeed waiting. He stands at the end of the main hall, in the entrance to the kitchen. Luke can smell something cooking, and Reid is smiling as Luke closes the front door behind him. He looks so beautiful standing there, a wooden spoon in his hand. “I figured I should try and cook since Damian isn’t here. The results will likely be far less satisfactory.”
The shame burns, and Luke can’t meet Reid’s eyes.
“Luke?”
He tries to smile as he kicks his boots off. “Smells great.” He turns to hang up his coat, holding up the paper bag. “I got the lube, so I hope you’re-”
Suddenly Reid is there, the wooden spoon forgotten on the floor, his hands spinning Luke around to face him. He stares intently for a long moment. Then he asks, “How much did you drink?”
“I didn’t-”
“How much?” Reid shouts, his fingers digging into Luke’s shoulders. “Don’t lie to me.”
Luke’s eyes fill, and he sags. “I’m sorry. I just needed a little bit. I went to see Mona Cross. I had to find out more about what they did.”
“And you had to drink to do that?” Reid’s fury is etched on his face. “I’m not going to let you kill yourself, you hear me?”
“It was just a couple drinks. And I’ll stop now! That was the last time. I poured the bottle out, I swear!”
Stepping back, Reid shakes his head. “I don’t believe you.”
“Reid, please!” Luke reaches out, grasping for Reid, clutching his sweater. “I’m sorry. Don’t hate me. I know I’m weak. I’m disgusting, I’m terrible. I’m not good enough for you.” He sniffs, and Reid tries to say something, but Luke barrels on. “I love you so much. Please don’t leave me. I’ll be better! I promise. I’ll be better.”
Reid stares, shocked. “You think I’d leave you?”
“You’re too good for me. Too smart. Too handsome. I mess everything up. I always have. It’s my fault.”
Reid’s face softens, and he draws Luke into his arms. “I won’t leave you, Luke. I love you.” He takes Luke’s face between his hands. “Do you hear me? I love you. You’re the only person who’s ever been worthy of that.”
Tears slip from Luke’s eyes, and a sob blocks his reply. Reid holds him close, rubbing his back as he speaks in a low voice. “You have a disease, and I’m going to help you get better. I’ll call Damian tonight and we’ll decide the best way to do that.”
Luke nods against Reid’s neck, clinging to him. His voice is muffled. “I talked to Mona.”
“Shh. That doesn’t matter now. You’re what matters.”
“No, listen.” Luke raises his head. “She said you’re a miracle. You’re not going to die, Reid. You’re not.”
Reid’s expression is unreadable. “You can tell me tomorrow. Let’s lie down.”
Luke lets Reid guide him up to bed, and Reid undresses him patiently. Luke tugs at Reid’s clothing, and when they’re both naked, they hold each other tightly under the duvet. Luke can’t stop shivering, and he kisses Reid desperately. “Please, I need you. Please.”
Reid disappears for a minute, and comes back with the paper bag. He covers Luke’s body with his own, kissing him deeply, hands roaming. When Luke’s ready, he lifts his legs onto Reid’s shoulders, and Reid pushes into him, the lube easing his way. Luke is sore, but he urges Reid on, the pleasure mixing with the pain, the heat of Reid inside him filling the terrifying emptiness.
Leaning down as he slowly moves in and out, Reid presses kisses to Luke’s face, lips soft against Luke’s cheeks, forehead, nose and chin. Reid strokes Luke’s cock in time with his gentle thrusts, and takes one of Luke’s hands, entwining their fingers. “You’re the only one I’ve ever loved. Only you, Luke. Only you.”
They rock together slowly, and Luke feels as if he’s stretching further and further open, Reid consuming him completely. “Stay with me,” Luke whispers. “Stay.”
Kissing him, Reid presses in even deeper.
*
It’s the pain that wakes him, a dull ache in his side that has seeped into his dreams. His limbs are heavy and his blood hot, and Luke’s throat is sandpaper as he tries to speak. His head is pillowed on something warm, and as he tries to move, he realizes it’s Reid’s chest. Reid stirs beneath him.
“Luke?” Reid strokes Luke’s hair, and suddenly his palm is on Luke’s forehead, and the steady beat of the heart below Luke’s ear doubles. Luke tries to answer as Reid rolls him onto his back, but strangely, no sound seems able to escape his lips.
His eyes are heavy, and Reid keeps telling him to open them. As Luke blinks in the early morning light, he catches glimpses of Reid peering down, fear and concern written clearly on his face. He tries to tell Reid not to worry, but then the fever pulls him back under.
Part nine
Ratings vary per chapter, but will go up to NC-17.
Part one
Part two
Part three
Part four
Part five
Part six
Part seven
The moment of grace before Luke remembers lasts only a few fleeting seconds as he wakes. His stomach clenches as the dread fills him, and he shivers and curls inward, drawing up his knees, keeping his eyes squeezed shut.
A moment later Reid is wrapped around him, his lips soft and warm on the back of Luke’s neck. Reid sounds as if he’s been awake for a while. “Hey.”
Luke opens his eyes reluctantly. He just wants to go back to sleep, and slip into dreams where Reid is going to live forever. He says nothing, and lets Reid roll him onto his back. Reid props himself up on his elbow and gazes down. He caresses Luke’s chest lightly before his fingers wrap around and trace Luke’s scar. “Feeling okay? You’re a little pale.”
“I’m fine.” Luke’s response is automatic.
Reid frowns. “Does it hurt?” He slides his hand down between Luke’s legs and touches Luke’s hole gently. “I know it’s been a long time.”
His ass is tender, but Luke shakes his head. “No. I mean, it does, a little. But I like it. It’s like…I can still feel you inside me.” He wants to hold onto this feeling forever, even if it is pain.
Reid kisses him softly. “As long as it wasn’t too much.” His fingers remain at Luke’s hole, not moving, just there. It’s intimate in a way that makes Luke feel safe and loved and special.
“It could never be too much with you. I want…everything.”
They kiss again slowly, breathing each other in. Reid’s fingers move a bit and then he’s cupping Luke’s balls, kneading them together in his palm. Luke groans into Reid’s mouth as his body starts to come to life. Reid seems to know exactly where to touch, and as he moves down and begins sucking Luke’s nipples in turn, Luke moans.
As Reid takes Luke’s cock in hand, he smiles. “I used to imagine what you’d be like in bed. What you’d sound like.”
Luke can only take a shuddering breath in response.
“Even when I was still desperately trying to get out of Oakdale, I couldn’t stop thinking about you.” He strokes Luke harder, his thumb flicking over the head of Luke’s cock. “I’d lie there in bed at night, thinking about how annoying you were, and then I’d jerk off and imagine you under me, moaning like this. Saying my name.”
“Reid. Reid.” The pleasure simmers, spreading out from Luke’s cock and warming his limbs.
“Just like that. I’d think about fucking your ass, about your lips wrapped around my dick. I’d even use my own fingers sometimes and imagine you inside me.” Reid smiles at Luke’s breathy moan. “And it’s been a long time since I’ve let anyone do that. But you want to know what I thought about most of all?”
Luke can only nod, his hips lifting as Reid strokes him.
“I imagined what it would be like to suck your cock.” With that, he descends and swallows Luke deeply.
Everything else - the worry, the fear, everything - fades away as Reid’s tongue does the most amazing things Luke’s ever felt. Reid’s hand is wrapped around the base of Luke’s cock, and he twists it in time with the motion of his tongue and the movement of his head up and down, taking Luke deeper and deeper.
Luke grasps at Reid’s short hair, barely able to get a grip, but eager to touch him. He bucks up into Reid’s mouth, all self control vanished as Reid licks and sucks him. The warm moisture is so tight all around him, and Luke moans loudly, his cries echoing in the rafters.
When Reid fondles Luke’s balls again, Luke comes in a sudden rush of bliss, shaking as he empties into Reid’s mouth and right down his throat. It drips out of Reid’s lips as he swallows, milking Luke until the shudders of ecstasy ebb. Reid lets Luke slip from his mouth, and Luke hauls him up, kissing him deeply.
Tasting himself all over Reid’s mouth, he strokes Reid’s tongue as he reaches down for Reid’s cock, which is leaking and hard. Pulling away reluctantly from Reid’s mouth, Luke smiles. “My turn.”
After rolling Reid onto his back, Luke shimmies down and takes him in deeply. Reid groans and holds Luke’s head, making little noises in his throat. He doesn’t last long, and as he floods Luke’s mouth, Luke swallows every drop. He loves the musky tang, and licks his lips as he rests his head on Reid’s belly.
Reid caresses Luke’s hair softly. “It’s even better than I thought. At least we got to do this,” he murmurs.
Luke pulls away and rolls to the side of the bed, the tension returned in an instant. “It was the first time, and you’re already talking like it’s the last.”
Reid touches Luke’s back. “I didn’t mean it like that.” He squeezes Luke’s shoulder. “Listen, there’s something else I should tell you.”
Nausea blooms in Luke’s stomach. “What?” Oh, God. Oh, God. He looks over his shoulder as Reid moves to sit beside him on the side of the bed.
“It’s okay.” Reid rubs Luke’s thigh. “It’s just that I’m finding there are some…gaps in my memories.”
“Gaps?”
“I’ll think about what I’d do to remove, say, an oligodendroglioma, and my mind will just be blank. So I’ll look it up, and once I read the procedure, it all comes back to me. But sometimes I forget again. And I can’t forget these things. Not if I want to be the doctor I was, Luke. I don’t know if I can be.”
“So you’ll keep reading and rereading until you remember. It’s normal, isn’t it? After trauma? It’ll take time.”
Reid’s small smile is rueful. “Nothing about this is normal. Maybe you’re right, but the thing with time is…”
That theirs might be ticking away. Luke stands, stepping away from Reid’s outstretched hand. “I’m not giving up.”
“Neither am I, Luke. I’m just being practical. I’m not throwing in the towel, but we have to manage our expectations.”
Luke doesn’t respond, and he doesn’t exhale the breath lodged in his throat until the bathroom door is safely closed behind him. He feels dizzy from the conflicting emotions coursing through him. Making love to Reid is the most incredible thing he’s ever experienced, but his hands are clammy with fear at the thought of it all disappearing tomorrow. Today. Any second now.
He fills his glass and lines up his pills, swallowing each one like he’s supposed to. All for nothing.
The force of his throw shatters what’s left of the glass on the tiled floor, little pieces of blue shards scattering in every direction. A moment later Reid flings open the door without knocking. He’s still naked, and he stares between the floor and Luke with concern.
“I’m fine. It just slipped.”
“Don’t move. You’re going to cut yourself.”
Luke gazes around, realizing he’s completely surrounded by the jagged remains of his glass. A little piece of what used to be a fish rests by his toe, and he nudges it.
“Don’t move. I’ll get you a pair of shoes and then we’ll clean this up.”
Reid disappears, and Luke can hear him rummaging around in the closet. He thinks of the bottles that once hid there, and closes his eyes as the longing takes hold.
*
As he rides the elevator up to Invicta’s local branch, housed in an office complex in a suburb just outside of Chicago, Luke straightens his tie. His suit is crisp and clean, and doesn’t hang off him too badly thanks to all of Damian’s cooking. He hasn’t worn a suit or his long overcoat since the night they found Reid, and he can still smell Reid in the wool. He closes his eyes for a moment, remembering the darkness of the trunk, and Reid trembling in his arms.
There’s a soft bing as the doors slide open on the fourteenth floor. He’d told Reid he had to attend a foundation board meeting, and Reid had kissed him goodbye and assured him he’d be all right alone for a few hours. Then he kissed Luke again, and asked him to drop by the drug store on his way home for lube. It was the first place Luke stopped on his drive to Chicago, and five tubes sit in a brown paper bag in the passenger seat of his car.
The young brunette receptionist looks up as he opens the frosted-glass door with Invicta Corporation written on it in bold, blocky letters. “Good afternoon, sir.” She smiles, showing a row of neat, bright teeth. “How can I help you?”
“I’m here to see Mona Cross.”
The receptionist peers down at what he assumes is her calendar. Luke can’t see over the raised front of her gleaming wood and glass desk. She frowns slightly. “I don’t see any one o’clock appointments for Ms. Cross. May I ask your name?”
“She’s expecting me.”
The young woman glances to her left, which tells Luke which direction to go in search of Mona’s office. What would Damian do? As Luke strides by her desk and down the serene and low-lit hallway, the receptionist squeaks. “Sir! Excuse me!”
With a deep breath, Luke stops himself from breaking into a run. He rounds a corner and continues, eyes scanning the silver nameplates on office doors, hoping he’ll find Mona’s soon. He can hear the receptionist in pursuit, her heels muffled by the carpet, but still audible as she speeds after him, stage whispering, “Sir!”
Then the right words appear. Mona Cross. Luke opens the door to the small, dark-hued room that holds a desk and two guest chairs and a row of filing cabinets. Mona practically leaps out of her seat when she sees him in the doorway, her eyes widening.
The agitated receptionist huffs at Luke’s heels. “I’m so sorry, ma’am. He just barged right in. Should I call security?”
Mona clears her throat. “No, Louisa. Thank you. I forgot to tell you Mr. Snyder was coming. My apologies.”
Luke glances over his shoulder as he shuts the door, smiling brightly. Louisa appears skeptical, but turns with a little shrug and heads back in the direction of her post. Luke smiles at Mona in what he hopes is a calm and intimidating manner. “You really should have been expecting me. Just be glad I didn’t bring my father.”
Mona smiles tightly and sits behind her desk. “Oh, his presence has certainly been felt at other offices, from what I understand.”
Luke’s smile is real this time. “Good.” Without being asked, he takes a seat across from Mona. “Well, you know why I’m here.”
“How is he?”
This question takes Luke off guard. He hesitates.
“Believe it or not, I only wish Dr. Oliver well. Is he recovering?”
“How can you sit there and pretend to be concerned for his well-being?” Luke leans forward in his chair. “I know you had something to do with this. With what happened to him. So tell me. Everything.”
“I’m not directly involved with Lazarus.”
“But you are involved in some way. You have to be, or else how would they have even known about Reid? How would they have gotten to him so quickly?”
She sighs. “It’s true that I added his name to the list of candidates. But that’s all.”
“Candidates?”
“Yes. People who might make appropriate test subjects due to their strong mental abilities. Reid Oliver was…is a genius. His brain is capable of much higher functioning than the average person. This made him a potential candidate. That’s all. It was just luck he was hit by that train.”
Luke has to swallow hard over the rage. “Luck?”
She actually looks chastened. “I meant for the project. The circumstances simply presented themselves. We didn’t have anything to do with Dr. Oliver’s death. That’s not how the project works. Mr. Snyder, we’re trying to help people. Do you know how many lives could be saved if we’re able to perfect this technology and these procedures?”
“You stole his body. You kept him strapped down to a gurney, gagged and helpless. You tortured him with tests and procedures that he can’t talk about because they were so fucking excruciating.”
Mona’s expression is pained. “I’m very sorry to hear that he suffered. I assure you that was never the intent!”
“Well, you know what they say about the road to hell, Ms. Cross.”
“Indeed. I do know that it was never expected for him to regain such a level of consciousness.”
“What do you mean?” Luke wants to turn her upside down and shake all her secrets onto the plush carpet.
“The other subjects, they were little more than vegetables when they were revived. Yet Dr. Oliver could speak; he could think. It was most unexpected.”
“And he could feel. Which none of you seemed to give a damn about.”
“I truly am sorry for his suffering, and I’m sure it was unintended. As I told you, I’m not involved in that level of the project, but you have to understand that medical research is very complicated. To make important discoveries, sacrifices must be made.”
Luke tightens his jaw, resisting the urge to lunge across the expanse of wood between them and strangle her. “Gotta break a few eggs to make an omelette, is that it?”
“Any suffering is truly regrettable.”
“Regrettable.” His fingernails dig into his palms.
She leans forward. “Don’t you see what an amazing step this is? The heart, it’s still functioning properly?”
Leery, Luke nods.
“It seems to have worked. It actually worked.”
“What did? What is it? Tell me!”
“I don’t know all the details; it’s far too scientific for me to understand. I’m an administrator, Mr. Snyder. But I know the heart is a hybrid.”
“Hybrid?” Luke’s own heart thumps in his chest.
“Part machine, part human. The other subjects, they all suffered serious organ damage and were given hybrid transplants. But the key is all in the brain. Once they were able to regenerate Dr. Oliver’s brain, they operated on one particular part of it. I don’t know what it’s called, but by adjusting something there, they were able to trick the body into accepting the new heart.”
Luke’s mind spins. “That’s why he doesn’t need to take anti-rejection meds.” The hope wells in his chest. Reid will be okay. He’s not like the others. He’s special. He’s different.
“Exactly! It’s an incredible leap forward in our research. These hybrid organs could save millions of lives.” Her eyes are bright. “Trillions!”
“But everyone else is dead, aren’t they?”
Her fervour diminishes considerably, and she sighs. “Unfortunately, yes. Dr. Oliver’s case is remarkable. They don’t know if they can ever duplicate these results. His recovery has been nothing short of miraculous.”
Luke prays to anyone who is listening, with everything he has, that she’s right. He has to live. “You’re right. It has been miraculous. And you are never, ever going to hurt him again. Invicta is going to stay far away from him. Do you understand me?”
“We wish him no harm, Mr. Snyder. In fact, his survival is vital to the continuation of the project. If we could monitor him-”
Luke stands and leans forward on the desk. “If anyone from Invicta contacts Reid, or attempts to come within fifty miles of him, it’ll be the last thing they ever do. And I’ll hold you personally responsible. Do you understand?”
She jerks her head in a nod. “Your father and his…associates have made the potential consequences extremely clear. Mr. Snyder, I hope…”
“Yes?”
“I sincerely hope you and Dr. Oliver make the most of this second chance. So few of us get them in life.”
After a moment, Luke nods, and turns his back on Mona Cross, leaving her and Invicta behind as he marches from the office. He feels Louisa’s eyes on him as he exits the lobby, but he doesn’t look back.
In his car, Luke breathes in and out slowly. Then he opens the paper bag sitting on the cold leather beside him, and pulls out the half-empty bottle. Just one last sip. The metal cap twists off easily, and he takes a gulp, the sweet burn of the vodka soothing him.
He hasn’t finished swallowing before the terrible shame returns, and he hates himself utterly for his revolting, pathetic weakness. His fingers grapple clumsily with the door handle, and then he’s pouring out the rest of the bottle into the slush of the parking lot. He can barely breathe as he watches it soak into the snow, and wants to throw himself onto his knees and scoop it up with his hands.
Instead he closes the door and turns the key in the ignition. Reid is waiting.
*
The sun is setting as Luke returns home. He’d driven slowly and stopped at a roadside diner for a huge plate of food to try and soak up some of the alcohol. In front of his house, Luke turns off the car and gazes at his reflection in the rear-view mirror. He fixes his hair and chews on another mint.
Inside, Reid is indeed waiting. He stands at the end of the main hall, in the entrance to the kitchen. Luke can smell something cooking, and Reid is smiling as Luke closes the front door behind him. He looks so beautiful standing there, a wooden spoon in his hand. “I figured I should try and cook since Damian isn’t here. The results will likely be far less satisfactory.”
The shame burns, and Luke can’t meet Reid’s eyes.
“Luke?”
He tries to smile as he kicks his boots off. “Smells great.” He turns to hang up his coat, holding up the paper bag. “I got the lube, so I hope you’re-”
Suddenly Reid is there, the wooden spoon forgotten on the floor, his hands spinning Luke around to face him. He stares intently for a long moment. Then he asks, “How much did you drink?”
“I didn’t-”
“How much?” Reid shouts, his fingers digging into Luke’s shoulders. “Don’t lie to me.”
Luke’s eyes fill, and he sags. “I’m sorry. I just needed a little bit. I went to see Mona Cross. I had to find out more about what they did.”
“And you had to drink to do that?” Reid’s fury is etched on his face. “I’m not going to let you kill yourself, you hear me?”
“It was just a couple drinks. And I’ll stop now! That was the last time. I poured the bottle out, I swear!”
Stepping back, Reid shakes his head. “I don’t believe you.”
“Reid, please!” Luke reaches out, grasping for Reid, clutching his sweater. “I’m sorry. Don’t hate me. I know I’m weak. I’m disgusting, I’m terrible. I’m not good enough for you.” He sniffs, and Reid tries to say something, but Luke barrels on. “I love you so much. Please don’t leave me. I’ll be better! I promise. I’ll be better.”
Reid stares, shocked. “You think I’d leave you?”
“You’re too good for me. Too smart. Too handsome. I mess everything up. I always have. It’s my fault.”
Reid’s face softens, and he draws Luke into his arms. “I won’t leave you, Luke. I love you.” He takes Luke’s face between his hands. “Do you hear me? I love you. You’re the only person who’s ever been worthy of that.”
Tears slip from Luke’s eyes, and a sob blocks his reply. Reid holds him close, rubbing his back as he speaks in a low voice. “You have a disease, and I’m going to help you get better. I’ll call Damian tonight and we’ll decide the best way to do that.”
Luke nods against Reid’s neck, clinging to him. His voice is muffled. “I talked to Mona.”
“Shh. That doesn’t matter now. You’re what matters.”
“No, listen.” Luke raises his head. “She said you’re a miracle. You’re not going to die, Reid. You’re not.”
Reid’s expression is unreadable. “You can tell me tomorrow. Let’s lie down.”
Luke lets Reid guide him up to bed, and Reid undresses him patiently. Luke tugs at Reid’s clothing, and when they’re both naked, they hold each other tightly under the duvet. Luke can’t stop shivering, and he kisses Reid desperately. “Please, I need you. Please.”
Reid disappears for a minute, and comes back with the paper bag. He covers Luke’s body with his own, kissing him deeply, hands roaming. When Luke’s ready, he lifts his legs onto Reid’s shoulders, and Reid pushes into him, the lube easing his way. Luke is sore, but he urges Reid on, the pleasure mixing with the pain, the heat of Reid inside him filling the terrifying emptiness.
Leaning down as he slowly moves in and out, Reid presses kisses to Luke’s face, lips soft against Luke’s cheeks, forehead, nose and chin. Reid strokes Luke’s cock in time with his gentle thrusts, and takes one of Luke’s hands, entwining their fingers. “You’re the only one I’ve ever loved. Only you, Luke. Only you.”
They rock together slowly, and Luke feels as if he’s stretching further and further open, Reid consuming him completely. “Stay with me,” Luke whispers. “Stay.”
Kissing him, Reid presses in even deeper.
*
It’s the pain that wakes him, a dull ache in his side that has seeped into his dreams. His limbs are heavy and his blood hot, and Luke’s throat is sandpaper as he tries to speak. His head is pillowed on something warm, and as he tries to move, he realizes it’s Reid’s chest. Reid stirs beneath him.
“Luke?” Reid strokes Luke’s hair, and suddenly his palm is on Luke’s forehead, and the steady beat of the heart below Luke’s ear doubles. Luke tries to answer as Reid rolls him onto his back, but strangely, no sound seems able to escape his lips.
His eyes are heavy, and Reid keeps telling him to open them. As Luke blinks in the early morning light, he catches glimpses of Reid peering down, fear and concern written clearly on his face. He tries to tell Reid not to worry, but then the fever pulls him back under.
Part nine