SPN fic: Dazzleland 8B/10

[big_pink]

And here's the next bit...

Also, for those lovely lovelies leaving comments -- many thanks and I'll be responding to everything, just as soon as the coffee kicks in. *kisses*

Comments

[geminigrl11]

Oh, damn. :( I'm crying. I knew it was coming and it gutted me anyway. *sobs*

This whole fic is just so wretchedly painful and there's such distance in it, unfathomable, unbreachable. It makes me feel like I can't really draw a full breath. I want so much for there to be some kind of happy ending (because I am a SAP) and yet - and yet - I just don't know how to get there.

Damn fine writing, as always. Stellar, really. ALWAYS.

(and woot! Buff State! Tesla! And Oswego in that last chapter which is so close it might as well be my hometown).

[big_pink]

Hey you. I was thinking of you when I wrote about Tesla. I couldn't quite do it justice -- there's a whole fic in there, about how he saw visions and stuff -- but it's a shout out. I've never been to Oswego, but there's a place on the other side of the border called Oswego Beach or some such thing and that's how I imagined it -- a summer place that always looks so tawdry and sad in the wintertime.

This fic's so hard to write because of the canon bookends. It's not happy. Next fic -- happy. I'm making a note to myself now.

[zelost_mind]

You have excellent timing, I'd just made a cup of tea when this popped up like an extra special treat.

Oh, Toad. And oh Sam, and oh Dean. And OH, Ms. Simon.

And even an oh Billy. Who is bitter undiluted evil. But you still got me kinda sympathizing with him a teensy tiny little bit.

[big_pink]

Well, nothing like tea and trauma I say. I'm glad you're sympathizing with Billy. He's profoundly creepy, yes, but there's a confused screwed up kid in there as well.

[a2zmom]

I knew as soon as Sam got to the golf course that Toad heard the voices also and planned to be a willing sacrifice. Poor Sam. It would never occur to him that other people can hear these voices also; he's so blinded by how different his family is.

Billy is incredibly frightening. In his deluded belief that is he more special, he has lost all empathy for other people.

Poor Dean here. He knows that Sam could be happy. But his happiness means Dean is left with nothing.

[big_pink]

Getting inside Billy's head I was really aided by the book We Have to Talk about Kevin. Really disturbing stuff. Plus, my A2's done a bit of work with young offenders, including those involved in fairly high-level violent crimes, and so I picked his brain a little.

I've said it before, but this is a completely dark tale. Sorry about that. Next time...puppies! And lollipops!

[a2zmom]

I have no problem with dark stories at all when they logically follow from the characters and the plot. Don't forget, my primary fandom is BtVS/AtS and you can't get much darker then a lot of the fic for those shows.

[big_pink]

Thanks -- I understand completely. :)

[koyote19]

oh. I want to cry, for Toad, and Sam. And Dean. And even John and Elise. I swear, every chapter just hits me harder than the last, and this one took my breath away.

[big_pink]

Yeah, it's just big old parade of fucked-upness in Dazzleland. I blame Kripke, cause it's really all canon. I'm just messin' with them a little.