gibb created a new drink called the butttini ( Read more... )

i'm so mother fucking swoll the toilet flusher broke off in my hand

Dear Universe ( Read more... )

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my roommates have decided it would be cool to stick all of the old, empty liquor bottles on the shelf in our family room. because this is essentially trash on our wall, i thought it would be funny to throw an old mcdonalds large fry box on the shelf in the midst of the bottles. now my roommates are freaking out and we are about to come to blows ( Read more... )

i went to a mall with brian today. we took a break from shopping for camouflage and thought we would hop over to Something To Do and maybe buy a german board game or monopoly calculator(yeah, that's a real item. a calculator has been created with the sole purpose of calculating the cost of rent on park place if it has two hotels. this information ( Read more... )

oh godhey, does anyone know who sent me the "super bowl is gay" quicktime movie last year. someone sent it to me over aim and i never watched it until today. it's honestly one of the funniest things i've ever seen in quicktime format. at one point i laughed so hard that kase came out of his room to see what the fuck was going on. i'd like to ( Read more... )

i swear on my unborn child's life that one day i will make a movie set in a post-apocalyptic future (the only kind of future worth having) and the soundtrack will be nothing but Herman's Hermits songs. that idea is too good to pass up ( Read more... )

i was a little unruly last night. sorry if i hurt anybody's feelings or arms. you know how it is ese, board games drive me loco.

i've been thinking a lot about how much better life would be if i was a kung fu master.

last night... i broke our bath tub