Realisations on a sunny day

[belmikey]

I seem to be reacting to Iniki's in a way not all that different from the way my mother reacted to her mother's passing

Comments

[elliesam]

You made the most compassionate and respectful choice for her. And it sucks, and will continue to suck. And the enormity of the suckage will catch up to you. But you two were good and loving friends to do it for her. Hugs.

[rustmon]

love you.

[ursulagoddess]

okay, so being the good gentile friend wanting to know more I googled 'sitting shiva' and came up with this, http://www.benjamins.ca/Static/shiva_background.htm

Can we bring you some hard boiled eggs & lentils and go shoeless to show our respect for your grief on Wednesday - or are you not up for a meeting yet? Or am I being a dumb ass for even suggesting this?

[belmikey]

I hadn't read that particular link before, but it's a pretty good summary of what shiva is all about. In my usual compusion to reduce everything to a pithier explanation, though, I usually boil Shiva down to two key points:

• It's about remembering the departed, not forgetting them
• It's really fantastic psychology, because after seven days of doing nothing but grieving, the mourners usually can't wait to get on with their lives!

I will probably be at meeting this week. It's somewhat subject to mood, and somewhat to vagaries of other things I need to get done before my business trip next week, but having skipped most of February, I had planned to return beginning with March Folkmoot.

However, while I thank you very much for the thought, I do not require the trappings of a shiva to know that my friends respect our grief. You have all provided ample evidence, and it was that, in part that I was thanking everyone for :-)

[cealfind]

I forgot my shoes this morning, and by result am going shoeless, does that count?

[skitten]

*hug*
I still think about Trixie and Pixel and they've been gone almost two years... and I think about Gretel who I lost when I was 9....
(all cats)
it does get less sad but the memories come back....

*nosesmooch*

[sal_e_peters]

Love you

Mithras still hangs about. Just ask all the sensatives who hang around me. You may still sense her about you. To me that is a reassuring feeling.