Fic: The Boyfriend 2/12
Title: The Boyfriend
Rating: PG-13
Pairing(s): Puck/Kurt
Genre: Romance/Humour/Angst
Warning: Some swearing throughout fic. Rating will change for very last installment (a bonus missing scene).
Word Count: 3798 (out of around 56,000)
Disclaimer: Glee is not mine.
A/N: I started this fic back in May but a new job, a bereavement and a million other things got in the way so I've only just finished. Kind of perfect timing as it's set during Thanksgiving and Christmas.
Summary: Puck has been working his butt off for the last three years as a PA so when his totally ungrateful boss, Kurt Hummel, offers him his dream on a silver platter he should be happy right? The catch - he has to pretend to be Kurt's boyfriend.
Chapter Two
“I want you to pretend to be my boyfriend.”
“Sorry Boss I must have misheard you.”
Hummel rolled his eyes “You heard me just fine. I need you to be my fake boyfriend.”
“You ...want me... to be... your... boyfriend?” Puck repeated slowly.
“No.”
Puck let out a relieved breath but had a feeling that he wasn’t going to like the conversation when Hummel shook his head in exasperation.
“I want you to be my fake boyfriend” Hummel repeated as if it were obvious.
“No frikkin way.”
“I’m not in love with the idea either but I’m desperate. My parents are expecting me for their anniversary, followed by Thanksgiving and they’re expecting me to bring my boyfriend.”
“Then why don’t you bring him?”
“Because he obviously doesn’t exist” Hummel glared at Puck when he repeated obviously but otherwise ignored him. “My dad worries, he thinks I work too hard so I told him I had a boyfriend to make him happy. Now I need to produce said boyfriend.”
There was no way in hell it was going to be him. “You’ll have to find someone else Boss.”
“No it has to be you.” He bit his lip when Puck asked why him but didn’t answer his question. “I’ll make it worth your while.”
“Can’t you get someone else to do it?”
“I don’t know anyone else” he admitted.
“You could pay someone” Puck suggested desperately.
“I wouldn’t feel comfortable inviting a stranger into my parents’ home. I need someone I can trust.”
“You trust me?” he asked completely thrown for a moment.
Hummel shifted awkwardly in his seat, crossing his arms in front of his chest before he nodded. “I’ll give you a raise.”
“I don’t know Boss...”
Hummel stared at him for a moment then sighed “Okay fine, I’ll recommend you to Jerry from End Zone.”
“I thought you said my last article wasn’t good enough?” If Hummel was willing to recommend someone who he believed to be subpar then he must be desperate.
His reply was a shrug “I’ll get you a position on End Zone if you do this one thing for me.”
“I’ll think about it.”
Over the next few days Puck decided that Hummel must have been trying to persuade him to say yes by being the biggest jerk on the planet. If he had to go for one more emergency dry cleaning trip or midnight coffee run he was going to flip and murder his boss and he was pretty sure that no one would convict him for it.
Puck glared down at the shopping list, every year Hummel would hand him a list mid-November and sent him out into New York to pick up his Christmas presents. His name never made the list of course, not that Puck particularly wanted a gift or anything. For a start he was Jewish so Christmas wasn’t exactly a big deal for him and secondly the dude was cheap. If Puck made the amount of money Hummel did he would buy his family nicer gifts than soaps and specialty jams in weird little baskets. As he grabbed more random crap off the shelves he had an internal debate, weighing up the pros and cons of Hummel’s proposal.
Pro - Never having to do Hummel’s Christmas shopping again.
Con - Pretending to like/love his boss - he didn’t think his acting skills were that good.
Pro - Only a week of hell in exchange for his dream job.
Con - A week of hell with Kurt Hummel.
Pro - No more 6am coffee runs or two am texts asking for shit that could wait until the morning.
Con - The Hummel’s were probably the kind of people who went to country club events or something like that where there would be even more posh dicks judging him.
Pro - Never having to ever read about fashion again.
Puck groaned as he realised he didn’t have a choice, whatever he decided to do he was screwed. If he said yes he would have to endure a week of Hummel but the alternative was worse. If Puck said no then he would be stuck as a PA until Hummel genuinely thought he was good enough to be recommended. Puck somehow doubted that was ever going to happen if he refused. He couldn’t bear to think about working for that tyrant without any hope of eventually getting where he wanted to be.
Not wanting to be yelled again Puck made sure to swing by the coffee place and pick up his boss’ Crème Brûlée Macchiato before heading back to the office, laden down with Christmas presents.
As soon as he put the shopping down on one of the couches and handed over the coffee, they headed downstairs so that Hummel, always particular about the shots next to his column, could view the photography for his next article. When Puck had told Mike that he often got dragged along to photo shoots or shows, Mike had naturally assumed that Puck got to see hot chicks in their underwear. Since Hummel only wrote about men’s fashion the models tended to be decidedly male but he let Mike think what he wanted. While some of the models were admittedly hot, Puck was much more interested in making his friend jealous than staring at some self obsessed dude dressed up in weird clothes.
“What do you think Mr Hummel?” The photographer, whose name Puck had already forgotten, asked nervously flapping about.
It was ridiculous how many people grovelled around him, it was like everyone apart from Puck thought the sun shone out of his ass. Well, Puck had been sent for toilet paper in the middle of the night so he knew for a fact that Kurt Hummel was just as human as everyone else on the planet.
Hummel held a picture in each hand and looked down umming and ahhhing over them. Puck, standing a few feet behind him rolled his eyes wondering if he would get time for lunch. There was a beef sandwich in the top draw of his desk that had been calling to him since eleven thirty and it was now two fifteen.
“I’m not sure.” Hummel held the two photographs up “What do you think Noah?”
“Huh?”
Hummel glanced over his shoulder “Which do you prefer?”
Puck had every right to be frozen with shock, Kurt Hummel had just asked his opinion. In almost three years of working for him, Hummel had never asked his opinion or indicated that it would be welcome. He cautiously stepped forward in case it was some kind of strange test or a joke and looked down at the pictures.
“This one” he said pointing to the photograph on the right.
“Why that one?” Hummel asked genuinely interested.
“Well the composition is better on that one. The colour on the other one pops more but this one is more moody and romantic which sits well with the theme of your article this week. I think the colour would be a distraction to be honest.”
Hummel gave him an appraising look then turned to the photographer, Lancelot? Larry? “You heard the man, this one please” he tapped the image lightly while Puck stood beside him slightly stunned, not really understanding what had just happened.
“Mr Hummel, with respect I think you should go with the colour photo.”
“No I want that one” he held out his hand without looking and Puck silently passed him his man bag ready to follow him out of the room.
“Sir, are you seriously going to go with your lackey’s opinion over mine?”
The dude was seriously asking to be hit, if Puck hadn’t learned to control his temper he would have had the guy in a head lock by now. He suppressed a growl and began counting to ten slowly in his head.
Hummel stiffened, turning slowly towards the guy whose name Puck didn’t feel bad about forgetting and gave him an icy stare. “Yes I have every intention of doing so because he’s right. And for your information his name is Noah Puckerman, he’s not my lackey he is my Personal Assistant. Apologise.”
The guy, Lando? No it was something weirder. Whatever his name was looked shocked before quickly uttering an apology.
“No. Not to me, to my PA.”
Puck didn’t know who was more shocked, him or the other dude but at least he managed to keep his mouth closed. The mouth breather opened and closed his mouth a few times before muttering “Sorry.”
“That’s sorry Sir or Mr Puckerman to you.”
Puck was beginning to feel sorry for the dude but not much, he smirked as the guy mumbled “Sorry Mr Puckerman” then nodded and followed Hummel out of the room.
It turned out that Puck wasn’t destined to eat his sandwich, as soon as they left the studio Hummel informed him that he had arranged to meet an up and coming designer while Puck was out of the office. They were meeting at a restaurant though so at least he was going to get fed.
Hummel and the young woman both ordered Caesar salads, it was no wonder the dude was so skinny if that was all he ate for lunch. Puck gazed longingly at the list of steaks on the menu then began to read the other options, not wanting to order the most expensive thing. Even if the company hadn’t been paying for it he doubted he would have ordered it. His family hadn’t exactly been well off when he was growing up and he still lived fairly frugally despite the healthy salary he earned.
“Order what you want Noah, I’m paying.”
Puck couldn’t help frowning at the small smile he was shot before Hummel turned his attention back to the girl. His weird behaviour was really beginning to freak Puck out. Why the hell was he treating him like a human being all of a sudden?
Then it dawned on him, Hummel’s proposal. He was obviously trying a different tack, trying to butter Puck up by being nice to him, asking his opinion and smiling. Bring it Puck thought, if the dude was going to be nice for a change why stop him. He signalled to the waiter that he was ready and ordered the biggest steak they had.
Back at the office, there had been more people hanging around out front than normal some of which had placards but they didn’t seem particularly organised or interested in people entering or exiting the building so Puck ignored them.
A few hours later Hummel buzzed him on the intercom so he headed into the office to find his boss peering out of the floor length windows.
“What’s going on down there?” Hummel demanded pointing at the crowd below.
Puck peered down, eyebrows rising in surprise when he clocked the number of people now in front of the building. He spotted a few security guards amidst the protesters but they didn’t seem to be doing a particularly good job of holding the unruly mob back from the staff that were leaving the building.
“Protest” Puck replied with a shrug.
The fact that there was a protest going on right outside their building wasn’t exactly surprising, it was more of a surprise that it hadn’t happened a few days earlier. The magazine’s last issue had been dedicated to fashion’s renewed interest in fur and it hadn’t exactly been unbiased reading. Puck had been more than surprised when Hummel had refused to write anything on the subject but whether that was because he disagreed with using fur or because he was a princess who didn’t like being told what to do, Puck didn’t know.
The phone rang and Puck picked up the receiver, thanked the receptionist then hung up. “Your car’s ready.”
Hummel nodded, picked up his man bag then paused staring nervously out of the window.
“Do you think you could give me a lift home?”
Puck was as shocked as Hummel when he realised what he had said, the dude had looked so worried and small and it had just slipped out. At least it wasn’t worse, he could have asked if the Ice Princess wanted seeing to his car, now that would have definitely gotten him a verbal bitch slap if not a real one.
Hummel bit his lip then nodded and walked out of the room, no doubt expecting him to follow. When they reached the lobby Puck could have sworn the dude was close to hyperventilating as they stood next to each other but was wise enough not to mention it. A security guard opened the door and they stepped out into a loud pushy crowd of people. Hummel’s breathing became more ragged and he pressed closer to Puck who spoke quietly into his ear.
“Pretend you’re on a catwalk and they’re your fans.”
Hummel huffed out a slight laugh but remained tense as they pushed through the protestors. A woman quickly approached them from the left shouting garbled slogans about fur being murder until she focused on Hummel’s face, her eyes narrowing.
“You! You’re as bad as the rest. You could have denounced the trade, been one unbiased voice in a sea of hypocrisy but no you wrote about scarves!”
Puck raised an arm in front of Hummel, pushed her forcibly away then placed a hand on the small of his back to steer him through the rest of the crowd towards the waiting black town car. Hummel jumped at the contact and he thought he saw a slight flinch but it wasn’t the time to get annoyed about his boss thinking that he was too good to be touched by the likes of Puck.
Pushing him into the car and telling him to slide across, Puck slid into the back seat of the sleek black car and slammed the door, locking it behind him. After giving the driver directions he let out a deep breath, one he had been holding since they stepped out of the building then glanced over at the other occupant of the car. Hummel was shaking slightly, staring out of the window with a glazed look in his eyes, his hands nervously playing with the toggles on his coat.
"It's okay Kurt, you’re safe."
Puck didn’t have a clue why he used Hummel’s first name. He never had before mainly because he had always assumed that he would be hit upside the head for presuming he was allowed to use it. Not that the dude had ever hit Puck before but there was always a first time for everything.
"Of course I'm safe. What, you think I need you to protect me?"
Puck was slightly taken back by the anger filled tone but he couldn’t figure out why it surprised him, the dude asking his opinion once didn’t make them anything resembling friends.
"No, of course not."
Hummel dug around in his man bag pulling out his cell phone, he tapped on the screen a few times before he made a frustrated noise and threw it against the seat in front of him. The driver didn’t even flinch.
"Are you okay?" Puck stared at him unsure what to do, never having seen Hummel loose his cool before.
"No. I can't believe what that woman said" he bit out before glaring out of the tinted window.
"Well she kinda had a point."
The glare suddenly turned towards him and if Puck had been any less of a badass he would have probably squirmed in his seat. "Don't you think I know that? Do you think I actually get to write what I want?"
Puck stared at him "You don't?"
Hummel scoffed "I may be good at writing about fall trends and how to wear a scarf with style but there's more to me than what you see."
"So what do you want to write about?"
"The things other writers don't. I want to shine a spotlight on things the industry doesn't want people to know."
Puck raised an eyebrow "I've never seen anything like that in the articles you’ve written."
He wasn’t exactly calling him a liar but he saw pretty much everything that Hummel ever sent to the editor and they were all witty rambles about men’s fashion, nothing that would make any waves.
"There's no point in giving you something to check if there’s no chance it’ll get published." Hummel picked his phone up off the floor and shoved it back into his bag. "I tried when I first started but I was told to stick to happier pieces." He made sarcastic air quotes as he said happier pieces and rolled his eyes in disgust.
"I'd like to read them."
Hummel looked up startled “You would?” He licked his lips and Puck’s gaze dropped momentarily to his lips before he remembered that he hated his boss. “Well you’re the only one.”
Puck was saved from coming up with an answer as the car slowed to a stop. He looked out of the window to find that they were parked outside of his apartment building. With a nod to Hummel and a quick “Thanks dude” to the driver he jumped out. The princess’ ice seemed to have, if not melted, thawed a tiny bit for those few minutes anyway. Puck found himself wondering about the guy underneath all that ice before he told himself he was crazy and shrugged it off.
As he pushed open the door to his apartment Puck moaned in happiness as the smell, that could only be matzah ball soup, hit him.
“Hey Georgie” he called out. “Just going to get changed.”
“Be quick it’s almost done” his sister called back.
A few minutes later he sat down at the tiny table that rarely got used and grabbed a spoon. Wednesday night dinner had turned into a bit of a ritual for them, it was the one night that their mom had night classes so it gave them a chance to catch up properly. Some Wednesdays dinner was incredibly late thanks to Hummel, so Georgie would let herself in and Puck would walk her home.
“So tell me about this deal. Your text was a bit mysterious.”
“Right, so my Boss wants me to do this one thing for him and he says if I do it he’ll give me a recommendation.”
Georgie took a sip of the broth “So what’s the problem?”
“It’s what he wants me to do.”
“Ohkay so what is it?”
“He wants me to go with him to his parents’ house for a week and pretend to be his boyfriend” Puck said in a rush.
Georgie’s lips twitched but to her credit she didn’t laugh. “I see, so what’s the problem?”
Puck felt his eyes go wide “It’s a full week with Kurt Hummel.”
“So?”
“So? So?! I’d have to pretend to like him, to be in serious like if not in love with him. Do you have any idea how hard that would be? I hate the dude!”
She rolled her eyes “You know you have to do it. This is your shot and you know it. You’ll regret it every single day if you don’t.”
Puck groaned “I know.”
Georgie smiled “You’re an amazing writer bro, this is it.”
Puck had always been defensive, feeling like he had something to prove and not one person had ever believed he was capable of being anything more than what he was. For the longest time he believed what everyone else thought, that he was just a delinquent who would never amount to anything. His little sister had changed all that, her unwavering belief in his talent had been the wakeup call he had waited for so long. She was the one who told him he should be a writer before he had even realised that he spent every spare moment he had with a pen in his hand. As soon as she said it, it became so clear and now all he wanted to do was to spend the rest of his life writing.
Puck leant back in his seat “So basically you’re telling me to...”
“Man up dude” Georgie finished for him. “Yep.”
The next day Hummel was all business, glaring at anyone who stepped in his way and staring down anyone who questioned his opinion with one elegant eyebrow raised. Puck walked into his boss’ office laden down with yet more dry cleaning, the guy seemed to get everything bar his underwear dry cleaned. He hung the clothes, or garments as he was often corrected, on the rail to the left of the door then crossed the room to hover in front of the desk.
Blue eyes glanced up at him and he swiftly received a confused frown “Can I help you Noah?”
“I’ve thought about your proposal.”
“Oh?”
Puck was pretty sure he would live to regret it but he had gotten to the point where he would do pretty much anything to end his time as Hummel’s bitch. “I’ll do it.”
“Y...you will?”
Puck shrugged perching on the edge of the desk, surprised when Hummel instead of telling him to get his ass of his five thousand dollar antique desk just stared at him, mouth slightly open.
“So what will it involve? I won’t have to like kiss you or anything will I?” He couldn’t think of anything he would like to do less despite the fact those lips looked soft and pouty.
Hummel gave him a bitch please look. “Don’t worry I won’t try and convert you.”
Did Hummel think he was straight? Not that he intended on correcting him, the last thing he needed was Kurt Hummel crushing on him.
“It’ll involve staying at my parents’ house for one week and hanging out with my family including my brother and his future wife. We will also attend my parent’s wedding anniversary party, socialise with a friend or two who still live in Ohio and celebrate Thanksgiving with my family.”
Puck nodded, he could manage all of that in fact it would probably be a piece of piss compared to working for Hummel, at least he would have to be vaguely nice and couldn’t demand coffee twenty four seven.
“You also will have to pretend to... if not love me then at least like me.”
Now that would be the hard part. “Fine so when do we do this thing?”
“I’ve booked us next week off. We’ll leave Friday after work” Hummel said, brushing his hair out of his face.
“This Friday?”
“Yes is that a problem?”
Other than the motor show being on Saturday no it was fucking perfect. “Nope.”
“Okay I’ll let you book the tickets then. First Class and make sure you get the miles.”
Rating: PG-13
Pairing(s): Puck/Kurt
Genre: Romance/Humour/Angst
Warning: Some swearing throughout fic. Rating will change for very last installment (a bonus missing scene).
Word Count: 3798 (out of around 56,000)
Disclaimer: Glee is not mine.
A/N: I started this fic back in May but a new job, a bereavement and a million other things got in the way so I've only just finished. Kind of perfect timing as it's set during Thanksgiving and Christmas.
Summary: Puck has been working his butt off for the last three years as a PA so when his totally ungrateful boss, Kurt Hummel, offers him his dream on a silver platter he should be happy right? The catch - he has to pretend to be Kurt's boyfriend.
Chapter Two
“I want you to pretend to be my boyfriend.”
“Sorry Boss I must have misheard you.”
Hummel rolled his eyes “You heard me just fine. I need you to be my fake boyfriend.”
“You ...want me... to be... your... boyfriend?” Puck repeated slowly.
“No.”
Puck let out a relieved breath but had a feeling that he wasn’t going to like the conversation when Hummel shook his head in exasperation.
“I want you to be my fake boyfriend” Hummel repeated as if it were obvious.
“No frikkin way.”
“I’m not in love with the idea either but I’m desperate. My parents are expecting me for their anniversary, followed by Thanksgiving and they’re expecting me to bring my boyfriend.”
“Then why don’t you bring him?”
“Because he obviously doesn’t exist” Hummel glared at Puck when he repeated obviously but otherwise ignored him. “My dad worries, he thinks I work too hard so I told him I had a boyfriend to make him happy. Now I need to produce said boyfriend.”
There was no way in hell it was going to be him. “You’ll have to find someone else Boss.”
“No it has to be you.” He bit his lip when Puck asked why him but didn’t answer his question. “I’ll make it worth your while.”
“Can’t you get someone else to do it?”
“I don’t know anyone else” he admitted.
“You could pay someone” Puck suggested desperately.
“I wouldn’t feel comfortable inviting a stranger into my parents’ home. I need someone I can trust.”
“You trust me?” he asked completely thrown for a moment.
Hummel shifted awkwardly in his seat, crossing his arms in front of his chest before he nodded. “I’ll give you a raise.”
“I don’t know Boss...”
Hummel stared at him for a moment then sighed “Okay fine, I’ll recommend you to Jerry from End Zone.”
“I thought you said my last article wasn’t good enough?” If Hummel was willing to recommend someone who he believed to be subpar then he must be desperate.
His reply was a shrug “I’ll get you a position on End Zone if you do this one thing for me.”
“I’ll think about it.”
Over the next few days Puck decided that Hummel must have been trying to persuade him to say yes by being the biggest jerk on the planet. If he had to go for one more emergency dry cleaning trip or midnight coffee run he was going to flip and murder his boss and he was pretty sure that no one would convict him for it.
Puck glared down at the shopping list, every year Hummel would hand him a list mid-November and sent him out into New York to pick up his Christmas presents. His name never made the list of course, not that Puck particularly wanted a gift or anything. For a start he was Jewish so Christmas wasn’t exactly a big deal for him and secondly the dude was cheap. If Puck made the amount of money Hummel did he would buy his family nicer gifts than soaps and specialty jams in weird little baskets. As he grabbed more random crap off the shelves he had an internal debate, weighing up the pros and cons of Hummel’s proposal.
Pro - Never having to do Hummel’s Christmas shopping again.
Con - Pretending to like/love his boss - he didn’t think his acting skills were that good.
Pro - Only a week of hell in exchange for his dream job.
Con - A week of hell with Kurt Hummel.
Pro - No more 6am coffee runs or two am texts asking for shit that could wait until the morning.
Con - The Hummel’s were probably the kind of people who went to country club events or something like that where there would be even more posh dicks judging him.
Pro - Never having to ever read about fashion again.
Puck groaned as he realised he didn’t have a choice, whatever he decided to do he was screwed. If he said yes he would have to endure a week of Hummel but the alternative was worse. If Puck said no then he would be stuck as a PA until Hummel genuinely thought he was good enough to be recommended. Puck somehow doubted that was ever going to happen if he refused. He couldn’t bear to think about working for that tyrant without any hope of eventually getting where he wanted to be.
Not wanting to be yelled again Puck made sure to swing by the coffee place and pick up his boss’ Crème Brûlée Macchiato before heading back to the office, laden down with Christmas presents.
As soon as he put the shopping down on one of the couches and handed over the coffee, they headed downstairs so that Hummel, always particular about the shots next to his column, could view the photography for his next article. When Puck had told Mike that he often got dragged along to photo shoots or shows, Mike had naturally assumed that Puck got to see hot chicks in their underwear. Since Hummel only wrote about men’s fashion the models tended to be decidedly male but he let Mike think what he wanted. While some of the models were admittedly hot, Puck was much more interested in making his friend jealous than staring at some self obsessed dude dressed up in weird clothes.
“What do you think Mr Hummel?” The photographer, whose name Puck had already forgotten, asked nervously flapping about.
It was ridiculous how many people grovelled around him, it was like everyone apart from Puck thought the sun shone out of his ass. Well, Puck had been sent for toilet paper in the middle of the night so he knew for a fact that Kurt Hummel was just as human as everyone else on the planet.
Hummel held a picture in each hand and looked down umming and ahhhing over them. Puck, standing a few feet behind him rolled his eyes wondering if he would get time for lunch. There was a beef sandwich in the top draw of his desk that had been calling to him since eleven thirty and it was now two fifteen.
“I’m not sure.” Hummel held the two photographs up “What do you think Noah?”
“Huh?”
Hummel glanced over his shoulder “Which do you prefer?”
Puck had every right to be frozen with shock, Kurt Hummel had just asked his opinion. In almost three years of working for him, Hummel had never asked his opinion or indicated that it would be welcome. He cautiously stepped forward in case it was some kind of strange test or a joke and looked down at the pictures.
“This one” he said pointing to the photograph on the right.
“Why that one?” Hummel asked genuinely interested.
“Well the composition is better on that one. The colour on the other one pops more but this one is more moody and romantic which sits well with the theme of your article this week. I think the colour would be a distraction to be honest.”
Hummel gave him an appraising look then turned to the photographer, Lancelot? Larry? “You heard the man, this one please” he tapped the image lightly while Puck stood beside him slightly stunned, not really understanding what had just happened.
“Mr Hummel, with respect I think you should go with the colour photo.”
“No I want that one” he held out his hand without looking and Puck silently passed him his man bag ready to follow him out of the room.
“Sir, are you seriously going to go with your lackey’s opinion over mine?”
The dude was seriously asking to be hit, if Puck hadn’t learned to control his temper he would have had the guy in a head lock by now. He suppressed a growl and began counting to ten slowly in his head.
Hummel stiffened, turning slowly towards the guy whose name Puck didn’t feel bad about forgetting and gave him an icy stare. “Yes I have every intention of doing so because he’s right. And for your information his name is Noah Puckerman, he’s not my lackey he is my Personal Assistant. Apologise.”
The guy, Lando? No it was something weirder. Whatever his name was looked shocked before quickly uttering an apology.
“No. Not to me, to my PA.”
Puck didn’t know who was more shocked, him or the other dude but at least he managed to keep his mouth closed. The mouth breather opened and closed his mouth a few times before muttering “Sorry.”
“That’s sorry Sir or Mr Puckerman to you.”
Puck was beginning to feel sorry for the dude but not much, he smirked as the guy mumbled “Sorry Mr Puckerman” then nodded and followed Hummel out of the room.
It turned out that Puck wasn’t destined to eat his sandwich, as soon as they left the studio Hummel informed him that he had arranged to meet an up and coming designer while Puck was out of the office. They were meeting at a restaurant though so at least he was going to get fed.
Hummel and the young woman both ordered Caesar salads, it was no wonder the dude was so skinny if that was all he ate for lunch. Puck gazed longingly at the list of steaks on the menu then began to read the other options, not wanting to order the most expensive thing. Even if the company hadn’t been paying for it he doubted he would have ordered it. His family hadn’t exactly been well off when he was growing up and he still lived fairly frugally despite the healthy salary he earned.
“Order what you want Noah, I’m paying.”
Puck couldn’t help frowning at the small smile he was shot before Hummel turned his attention back to the girl. His weird behaviour was really beginning to freak Puck out. Why the hell was he treating him like a human being all of a sudden?
Then it dawned on him, Hummel’s proposal. He was obviously trying a different tack, trying to butter Puck up by being nice to him, asking his opinion and smiling. Bring it Puck thought, if the dude was going to be nice for a change why stop him. He signalled to the waiter that he was ready and ordered the biggest steak they had.
Back at the office, there had been more people hanging around out front than normal some of which had placards but they didn’t seem particularly organised or interested in people entering or exiting the building so Puck ignored them.
A few hours later Hummel buzzed him on the intercom so he headed into the office to find his boss peering out of the floor length windows.
“What’s going on down there?” Hummel demanded pointing at the crowd below.
Puck peered down, eyebrows rising in surprise when he clocked the number of people now in front of the building. He spotted a few security guards amidst the protesters but they didn’t seem to be doing a particularly good job of holding the unruly mob back from the staff that were leaving the building.
“Protest” Puck replied with a shrug.
The fact that there was a protest going on right outside their building wasn’t exactly surprising, it was more of a surprise that it hadn’t happened a few days earlier. The magazine’s last issue had been dedicated to fashion’s renewed interest in fur and it hadn’t exactly been unbiased reading. Puck had been more than surprised when Hummel had refused to write anything on the subject but whether that was because he disagreed with using fur or because he was a princess who didn’t like being told what to do, Puck didn’t know.
The phone rang and Puck picked up the receiver, thanked the receptionist then hung up. “Your car’s ready.”
Hummel nodded, picked up his man bag then paused staring nervously out of the window.
“Do you think you could give me a lift home?”
Puck was as shocked as Hummel when he realised what he had said, the dude had looked so worried and small and it had just slipped out. At least it wasn’t worse, he could have asked if the Ice Princess wanted seeing to his car, now that would have definitely gotten him a verbal bitch slap if not a real one.
Hummel bit his lip then nodded and walked out of the room, no doubt expecting him to follow. When they reached the lobby Puck could have sworn the dude was close to hyperventilating as they stood next to each other but was wise enough not to mention it. A security guard opened the door and they stepped out into a loud pushy crowd of people. Hummel’s breathing became more ragged and he pressed closer to Puck who spoke quietly into his ear.
“Pretend you’re on a catwalk and they’re your fans.”
Hummel huffed out a slight laugh but remained tense as they pushed through the protestors. A woman quickly approached them from the left shouting garbled slogans about fur being murder until she focused on Hummel’s face, her eyes narrowing.
“You! You’re as bad as the rest. You could have denounced the trade, been one unbiased voice in a sea of hypocrisy but no you wrote about scarves!”
Puck raised an arm in front of Hummel, pushed her forcibly away then placed a hand on the small of his back to steer him through the rest of the crowd towards the waiting black town car. Hummel jumped at the contact and he thought he saw a slight flinch but it wasn’t the time to get annoyed about his boss thinking that he was too good to be touched by the likes of Puck.
Pushing him into the car and telling him to slide across, Puck slid into the back seat of the sleek black car and slammed the door, locking it behind him. After giving the driver directions he let out a deep breath, one he had been holding since they stepped out of the building then glanced over at the other occupant of the car. Hummel was shaking slightly, staring out of the window with a glazed look in his eyes, his hands nervously playing with the toggles on his coat.
"It's okay Kurt, you’re safe."
Puck didn’t have a clue why he used Hummel’s first name. He never had before mainly because he had always assumed that he would be hit upside the head for presuming he was allowed to use it. Not that the dude had ever hit Puck before but there was always a first time for everything.
"Of course I'm safe. What, you think I need you to protect me?"
Puck was slightly taken back by the anger filled tone but he couldn’t figure out why it surprised him, the dude asking his opinion once didn’t make them anything resembling friends.
"No, of course not."
Hummel dug around in his man bag pulling out his cell phone, he tapped on the screen a few times before he made a frustrated noise and threw it against the seat in front of him. The driver didn’t even flinch.
"Are you okay?" Puck stared at him unsure what to do, never having seen Hummel loose his cool before.
"No. I can't believe what that woman said" he bit out before glaring out of the tinted window.
"Well she kinda had a point."
The glare suddenly turned towards him and if Puck had been any less of a badass he would have probably squirmed in his seat. "Don't you think I know that? Do you think I actually get to write what I want?"
Puck stared at him "You don't?"
Hummel scoffed "I may be good at writing about fall trends and how to wear a scarf with style but there's more to me than what you see."
"So what do you want to write about?"
"The things other writers don't. I want to shine a spotlight on things the industry doesn't want people to know."
Puck raised an eyebrow "I've never seen anything like that in the articles you’ve written."
He wasn’t exactly calling him a liar but he saw pretty much everything that Hummel ever sent to the editor and they were all witty rambles about men’s fashion, nothing that would make any waves.
"There's no point in giving you something to check if there’s no chance it’ll get published." Hummel picked his phone up off the floor and shoved it back into his bag. "I tried when I first started but I was told to stick to happier pieces." He made sarcastic air quotes as he said happier pieces and rolled his eyes in disgust.
"I'd like to read them."
Hummel looked up startled “You would?” He licked his lips and Puck’s gaze dropped momentarily to his lips before he remembered that he hated his boss. “Well you’re the only one.”
Puck was saved from coming up with an answer as the car slowed to a stop. He looked out of the window to find that they were parked outside of his apartment building. With a nod to Hummel and a quick “Thanks dude” to the driver he jumped out. The princess’ ice seemed to have, if not melted, thawed a tiny bit for those few minutes anyway. Puck found himself wondering about the guy underneath all that ice before he told himself he was crazy and shrugged it off.
As he pushed open the door to his apartment Puck moaned in happiness as the smell, that could only be matzah ball soup, hit him.
“Hey Georgie” he called out. “Just going to get changed.”
“Be quick it’s almost done” his sister called back.
A few minutes later he sat down at the tiny table that rarely got used and grabbed a spoon. Wednesday night dinner had turned into a bit of a ritual for them, it was the one night that their mom had night classes so it gave them a chance to catch up properly. Some Wednesdays dinner was incredibly late thanks to Hummel, so Georgie would let herself in and Puck would walk her home.
“So tell me about this deal. Your text was a bit mysterious.”
“Right, so my Boss wants me to do this one thing for him and he says if I do it he’ll give me a recommendation.”
Georgie took a sip of the broth “So what’s the problem?”
“It’s what he wants me to do.”
“Ohkay so what is it?”
“He wants me to go with him to his parents’ house for a week and pretend to be his boyfriend” Puck said in a rush.
Georgie’s lips twitched but to her credit she didn’t laugh. “I see, so what’s the problem?”
Puck felt his eyes go wide “It’s a full week with Kurt Hummel.”
“So?”
“So? So?! I’d have to pretend to like him, to be in serious like if not in love with him. Do you have any idea how hard that would be? I hate the dude!”
She rolled her eyes “You know you have to do it. This is your shot and you know it. You’ll regret it every single day if you don’t.”
Puck groaned “I know.”
Georgie smiled “You’re an amazing writer bro, this is it.”
Puck had always been defensive, feeling like he had something to prove and not one person had ever believed he was capable of being anything more than what he was. For the longest time he believed what everyone else thought, that he was just a delinquent who would never amount to anything. His little sister had changed all that, her unwavering belief in his talent had been the wakeup call he had waited for so long. She was the one who told him he should be a writer before he had even realised that he spent every spare moment he had with a pen in his hand. As soon as she said it, it became so clear and now all he wanted to do was to spend the rest of his life writing.
Puck leant back in his seat “So basically you’re telling me to...”
“Man up dude” Georgie finished for him. “Yep.”
The next day Hummel was all business, glaring at anyone who stepped in his way and staring down anyone who questioned his opinion with one elegant eyebrow raised. Puck walked into his boss’ office laden down with yet more dry cleaning, the guy seemed to get everything bar his underwear dry cleaned. He hung the clothes, or garments as he was often corrected, on the rail to the left of the door then crossed the room to hover in front of the desk.
Blue eyes glanced up at him and he swiftly received a confused frown “Can I help you Noah?”
“I’ve thought about your proposal.”
“Oh?”
Puck was pretty sure he would live to regret it but he had gotten to the point where he would do pretty much anything to end his time as Hummel’s bitch. “I’ll do it.”
“Y...you will?”
Puck shrugged perching on the edge of the desk, surprised when Hummel instead of telling him to get his ass of his five thousand dollar antique desk just stared at him, mouth slightly open.
“So what will it involve? I won’t have to like kiss you or anything will I?” He couldn’t think of anything he would like to do less despite the fact those lips looked soft and pouty.
Hummel gave him a bitch please look. “Don’t worry I won’t try and convert you.”
Did Hummel think he was straight? Not that he intended on correcting him, the last thing he needed was Kurt Hummel crushing on him.
“It’ll involve staying at my parents’ house for one week and hanging out with my family including my brother and his future wife. We will also attend my parent’s wedding anniversary party, socialise with a friend or two who still live in Ohio and celebrate Thanksgiving with my family.”
Puck nodded, he could manage all of that in fact it would probably be a piece of piss compared to working for Hummel, at least he would have to be vaguely nice and couldn’t demand coffee twenty four seven.
“You also will have to pretend to... if not love me then at least like me.”
Now that would be the hard part. “Fine so when do we do this thing?”
“I’ve booked us next week off. We’ll leave Friday after work” Hummel said, brushing his hair out of his face.
“This Friday?”
“Yes is that a problem?”
Other than the motor show being on Saturday no it was fucking perfect. “Nope.”
“Okay I’ll let you book the tickets then. First Class and make sure you get the miles.”