It's so funny how things have changed. So drastically. If someone were to tell me this is how my life was going to be 4 years ago i would laugh so hard but then say.."For real ( Read more... )

Wow. Its been almost 4 years since i have updated this thing. Looking back on what i used to be like is depressing but in a way...refreshing. I love who i used to be. how do i go back? how do i go back to knowing exactly what made me happy ( Read more... )

Somethings just make me so upset and just make me feel like giving up.
but then again i know i am stupid and don't mean that.
i just dont know.

All i want is the summer.

I hope we end up going tonight.
we need to do something like that.

I'm ready but i'm not.

I'm just really scared.

It's odd. everything.

I really am so happy, but it's just strange to have to hold all of this back. even worse--not being believed. but really who can i blame but myself for that one? good job, ash. good past i made for myself.

I still need to study!

of course this was going to happen.

stupid. irrational. nonsensical. senseless.
why does the human mind always want more, something different, something else?
I just dont get it.

My practices are going well though.
I am so proud of myself.

I love this weather.

Moving forward is a good thing.

My head hurts a lot & life as not a blonde is pretty fantastic and i love it.

I also worry too much and wish things would just happen.
But i will be patient.

Is it even worth it anymore? I don't know.

But today i conquered knitting.