Today is one of those days where I feel like I "can't take it anymore ( Read more... )

I feel like I keep getting punched in the gut.

My health insurance bill just went up by $100 a month, and now I am making $30 less a month thanks to some stupid effing Social Security/tax thing.

Why don't you just eliminate me altogether? I obviously don't deserve to have money on this earth.

I feel lonely. I don't know why I want time alone, and then when I get it, I am lonely.

Also I wonder why I torment myself by looking at other people's artwork and then feeling like a failure at my own art. I need to spend more time making art and less time online seeing what other people are doing.

Well, I didn't win the $35 washi tape contest at ihanna's blog. Disappointing...

I'm doing as well as I can right now. Up and down all day long. Maybe that is all I can hope for right now.

I know people on Facebook have a tendency to "play up" what they are doing, but I feel like I'm the only one who is NOT excited about Christmas, is NOT decorating the house/writing out cards/baking like mad, and is feeling sorta crapola.

I'm afraid to say anything negative on there these days.

I need to go make some art, Or something...

I just wanted to say I am OK. In case anyone has been reading this journal and wondering. I'm still hanging in there. Here? Wherever.

Not much has changed, but I keep getting up every day and living.

Peace to you.

I am broken...exhausted...numb...perhaps I'll never be the same. Perhaps this night will only be a bad memory. Perhaps it will be a good one. Perhaps it will come to mean nothing, like so many others.

Do I have a place in this world? 

I haee been having some really crappy feelings the past day or so. The usual: job search, unemployment benefits, lack of health insurance, feeling unable to talk about this with my friends and family...

I know this will pass but I am scared of what the future holds.

Bored to Death right now. Middle of the night and I should probably just go to bed...Harumph...

Just applied for medical assistance but I think our income level is a tad too high. Double Harumph...