Fic: Bad Day At Work
Title: Bad Day At Work
Author: badly_knitted
Characters: Ianto, Jack, Owen, Janet, Others.
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1160
Summary: Ianto has had a terrible day at work, but Jack will do his best to make it all better.
Spoilers: Nada.
Written For: cozy_coffee’s prompt ‘Any, any & any,
"My head hurts."
"Are you sick?"
"...no, I had to deal with stupid people all day."’ at comment_fic.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood or any of the characters
Arriving home from the Hub, Ianto kicked his shoes off just inside the door, shambled down the steps into the lounge, tossed his coat and his suit jacket over the back of the nearest chair, and collapsed onto the sofa, leaning his head back against the cushions with a weary groan, and closing his eyes.ub
“Ianto?” Jack was instantly concerned; this was very unlike his tidy husband, who usually breezed in, put his shoes away, and hung his coat up before going to collect his welcome home kiss. Waddling out of the kitchen where he’d been preparing dinner, he made his way over to the sofa. “What’s wrong?”
“My head hurts.” Ianto didn’t bother opening his eyes.
Reaching out, Jack rested the back of his hand gently against Ianto’s forehead, checking for any sign of a fever.
“Are you sick? I don’t think you have a temperature.”
Shaking his head, Ianto cracked one eye open. “Not sick, just sick of work. I’ve been dealing with stupid people all day, and all I have to show for it is a headache.”
“I’m sorry. I should’ve been there to help you.”
That drew a tired chuckle from Ianto. “You’re almost eight months pregnant and you have baby brain; I think you’ve got enough to deal with. The last thing you need is a colossal headache from trying to reason with idiots who wouldn’t know common sense if it jumped up and bit them on the arse.”
“Which idiots are we talking about?”
“Take your pick. In pole position there’s our team medic who decided it would be a great idea to test out his new Retcon formula for selective memory removal on Andy and Mickey. He managed to make both of them forget their own names for three hours, so they had no idea who they were and never knew when someone was talking to them.”
Jack frowned. “I’ve told Owen before not to use the team as guinea pigs for his experiments!”
“I know, and so have I. Repeatedly. But he still does it. I’m beginning to think all his work with Retcon is affecting his memory.” Ianto rubbed his eyes tiredly. “Then there was the mayor who, having found something he couldn’t identify in the car park outside the council building, sensibly called us. Then when I explicitly told him NOT to touch it under any circumstances, he promptly picked it up and turned himself into a human-sized hedgehog. It took Tosh over an hour to change him back; we had to Retcon seventeen pedestrians, and three motorists, who crashed into each other when they saw a giant hedgehog trying to get into the mayor’s car. We managed to convince them it was someone in costume.”
“Did you Retcon the Mayor too?”
“Not this time, no. Maybe if he remembers what happened, he’ll listen and follow our advice in future.”
“I wouldn’t bet on it.”
“Neither would I. Anyway, as if that wasn’t bad enough, this afternoon I had General Newlin of UNIT ranting at me over the phone for a good ninety minutes because the alien weapons we handed over to them after confiscating them from those Telvanian slavers don’t work. Naturally he blamed our incompetence, despite the fact that if anyone had actually read the information packet we sent with them, which Tosh and Mickey spent two days putting together, they would have seen that the energy packs have to be installed while the control lever is in the off position, otherwise the power is automatically drained as a safety precaution.”
“That’s a fairly standard safety feature; it avoids accidental discharge.”
“You and I know that, but UNIT clearly doesn’t. In the space of an hour, they managed to drain every single power pack they had, all thirty-three of them. They each take forty-eight hours to fully recharge, using the one charger Tosh was able to find that could be adapted to convert alternating current to a form of energy the weapons can use. I told him Torchwood isn’t responsible for his inability to read simple instructions, and next time we came across any interesting technology, we wouldn’t bother sharing it with them. He was not pleased, so I hung up on him.”
“Poor Ianto,” Jack commiserated. “What a horrible day you’ve had. Here, let me see what I can do about your headache.” Making his way around the back of the sofa, he pressed his fingers to Ianto’s temples and began to give his husband a soothing massage.
“Mm, that feels amazing.” Ianto could feel the tension and pain slowly melting away beneath Jack’s tender ministrations.
“It’s the least I can do now you’ve taken over my job until the baby’s born. If I wasn’t pregnant, I’d march right over to UNIT and give General Newlin a piece of my mind. He’s always convinced he knows everything better than anyone else; how he ever got promoted that high I’ll never know. I remember when he was a Major, he tried to tell a construction worker how to do his job, snatched a nail gun out of the man’s hand and promptly nailed his own foot to the floor. That was twenty years ago, and he still has a slight limp.”
“Safe to say he hasn’t learned from his mistakes.”
“Some people never do. Now, why don’t you go and take a nice, relaxing bath while I fix dinner? I’m making my famous cheese and potato pie.”
“Sounds perfect.” Ianto sat up and stretched. “Thanks for the massage; my head feels better already.” As he got up, Ianto’s phone started to ring and he pulled it from his pocket without thinking, putting it to his ear. “This better be important.” He fell silent for a moment, before bellowing, “HE DID WHAT?!”
“Oh, that does not sound good.” Jack stared at his husband, eyes wide.
Hanging up, for a moment it looked like Ianto was about to throw his phone across the room, but instead he took a deep breath, turned it off, and returned it to his pocket. “Bloody Owen Harper! I swear, this time I’m going to kill him!”
“What’s he done now?” Jack hardly dared ask, not sure he really wanted to know.
“Because I vetoed him testing the Retcon on the team, he’s used it on Janet. Made the poor thing forget she’s a Weevil, then she caught sight of her reflection and panicked. Gwen thinks I should go back to the Hub and help calm her down.”
“No,” Jack said firmly. “Not this time. Actions have consequences. Owen caused the problem, so he can fix it himself.”
“But what about poor Janet? It’s not fair on her.”
“I’m sure she’ll get her revenge on Owen once her memory comes back; I wouldn’t want to be him. Now, you’re off duty so go and relax. You’ve more than earned it.”
Ianto gave a wan smile. “Yes, Sir.”
He could only hope tomorrow would be better.
The End
Author: badly_knitted
Characters: Ianto, Jack, Owen, Janet, Others.
Rating: PG
Word Count: 1160
Summary: Ianto has had a terrible day at work, but Jack will do his best to make it all better.
Spoilers: Nada.
Written For: cozy_coffee’s prompt ‘Any, any & any,
"My head hurts."
"Are you sick?"
"...no, I had to deal with stupid people all day."’ at comment_fic.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood or any of the characters
Arriving home from the Hub, Ianto kicked his shoes off just inside the door, shambled down the steps into the lounge, tossed his coat and his suit jacket over the back of the nearest chair, and collapsed onto the sofa, leaning his head back against the cushions with a weary groan, and closing his eyes.ub
“Ianto?” Jack was instantly concerned; this was very unlike his tidy husband, who usually breezed in, put his shoes away, and hung his coat up before going to collect his welcome home kiss. Waddling out of the kitchen where he’d been preparing dinner, he made his way over to the sofa. “What’s wrong?”
“My head hurts.” Ianto didn’t bother opening his eyes.
Reaching out, Jack rested the back of his hand gently against Ianto’s forehead, checking for any sign of a fever.
“Are you sick? I don’t think you have a temperature.”
Shaking his head, Ianto cracked one eye open. “Not sick, just sick of work. I’ve been dealing with stupid people all day, and all I have to show for it is a headache.”
“I’m sorry. I should’ve been there to help you.”
That drew a tired chuckle from Ianto. “You’re almost eight months pregnant and you have baby brain; I think you’ve got enough to deal with. The last thing you need is a colossal headache from trying to reason with idiots who wouldn’t know common sense if it jumped up and bit them on the arse.”
“Which idiots are we talking about?”
“Take your pick. In pole position there’s our team medic who decided it would be a great idea to test out his new Retcon formula for selective memory removal on Andy and Mickey. He managed to make both of them forget their own names for three hours, so they had no idea who they were and never knew when someone was talking to them.”
Jack frowned. “I’ve told Owen before not to use the team as guinea pigs for his experiments!”
“I know, and so have I. Repeatedly. But he still does it. I’m beginning to think all his work with Retcon is affecting his memory.” Ianto rubbed his eyes tiredly. “Then there was the mayor who, having found something he couldn’t identify in the car park outside the council building, sensibly called us. Then when I explicitly told him NOT to touch it under any circumstances, he promptly picked it up and turned himself into a human-sized hedgehog. It took Tosh over an hour to change him back; we had to Retcon seventeen pedestrians, and three motorists, who crashed into each other when they saw a giant hedgehog trying to get into the mayor’s car. We managed to convince them it was someone in costume.”
“Did you Retcon the Mayor too?”
“Not this time, no. Maybe if he remembers what happened, he’ll listen and follow our advice in future.”
“I wouldn’t bet on it.”
“Neither would I. Anyway, as if that wasn’t bad enough, this afternoon I had General Newlin of UNIT ranting at me over the phone for a good ninety minutes because the alien weapons we handed over to them after confiscating them from those Telvanian slavers don’t work. Naturally he blamed our incompetence, despite the fact that if anyone had actually read the information packet we sent with them, which Tosh and Mickey spent two days putting together, they would have seen that the energy packs have to be installed while the control lever is in the off position, otherwise the power is automatically drained as a safety precaution.”
“That’s a fairly standard safety feature; it avoids accidental discharge.”
“You and I know that, but UNIT clearly doesn’t. In the space of an hour, they managed to drain every single power pack they had, all thirty-three of them. They each take forty-eight hours to fully recharge, using the one charger Tosh was able to find that could be adapted to convert alternating current to a form of energy the weapons can use. I told him Torchwood isn’t responsible for his inability to read simple instructions, and next time we came across any interesting technology, we wouldn’t bother sharing it with them. He was not pleased, so I hung up on him.”
“Poor Ianto,” Jack commiserated. “What a horrible day you’ve had. Here, let me see what I can do about your headache.” Making his way around the back of the sofa, he pressed his fingers to Ianto’s temples and began to give his husband a soothing massage.
“Mm, that feels amazing.” Ianto could feel the tension and pain slowly melting away beneath Jack’s tender ministrations.
“It’s the least I can do now you’ve taken over my job until the baby’s born. If I wasn’t pregnant, I’d march right over to UNIT and give General Newlin a piece of my mind. He’s always convinced he knows everything better than anyone else; how he ever got promoted that high I’ll never know. I remember when he was a Major, he tried to tell a construction worker how to do his job, snatched a nail gun out of the man’s hand and promptly nailed his own foot to the floor. That was twenty years ago, and he still has a slight limp.”
“Safe to say he hasn’t learned from his mistakes.”
“Some people never do. Now, why don’t you go and take a nice, relaxing bath while I fix dinner? I’m making my famous cheese and potato pie.”
“Sounds perfect.” Ianto sat up and stretched. “Thanks for the massage; my head feels better already.” As he got up, Ianto’s phone started to ring and he pulled it from his pocket without thinking, putting it to his ear. “This better be important.” He fell silent for a moment, before bellowing, “HE DID WHAT?!”
“Oh, that does not sound good.” Jack stared at his husband, eyes wide.
Hanging up, for a moment it looked like Ianto was about to throw his phone across the room, but instead he took a deep breath, turned it off, and returned it to his pocket. “Bloody Owen Harper! I swear, this time I’m going to kill him!”
“What’s he done now?” Jack hardly dared ask, not sure he really wanted to know.
“Because I vetoed him testing the Retcon on the team, he’s used it on Janet. Made the poor thing forget she’s a Weevil, then she caught sight of her reflection and panicked. Gwen thinks I should go back to the Hub and help calm her down.”
“No,” Jack said firmly. “Not this time. Actions have consequences. Owen caused the problem, so he can fix it himself.”
“But what about poor Janet? It’s not fair on her.”
“I’m sure she’ll get her revenge on Owen once her memory comes back; I wouldn’t want to be him. Now, you’re off duty so go and relax. You’ve more than earned it.”
Ianto gave a wan smile. “Yes, Sir.”
He could only hope tomorrow would be better.
The End