Wow it has been a few years since I have journaled or been on this site. Again I am able to see how much I have changed over the years. It seems every year I am a different person with different experiences. Wish I could say that it was all for the better but I've made plenty of mistakes these past few years. Good news though, going to Colorado in ( Read more... )

Empty.... pretty much describes my life. I keep asking myself how do i get full. it was the topic of bible study last night and it seemed like nicole kept looking right at me as if she knew how i felt. I know when i get closer to God i am happier but it just feels so empty and i have so many doubts and i'm just so weak in faith and weak as a person ( Read more... )

its over we broke up....... i need cheered up.

Advice concerning my last post anyone? Also pray for chancys fam. his grandma or well a lady basically like his grandma died yesterday so pray for her. Thanks guys.

with one action you make me feel worthless. how is it that you can still do that. Why do you still do that. it hurts me so much. Not even now can you let other people know that you can have any form of communication with me. Am i somebody to be that ashamed of? What have i ever done wrong? I know the rest of the girls were all prettier than me but ( Read more... )

i thought about some things yesterday. its quite sad that i cant get rid of these memories. i hate them. they tear me up inside and make me hate myself. i just want to tell somebody everything that happened and get it all off my chest and out of my mind forever. its pretty pathetic that i still let these things have control of my emotions. As i sat ( Read more... )

I got to see the flipping Globetrotters last night!!!!!!

dreams of him....... I hate this......God i just dont understand some things. i know we make our own choices and we effect our own lives i just wish i hadnt made those mistakes. if i hadnt then it wouldnt have happened. those words just ring in my ears after every dream. all of them just an echo bouncing around everywhere.... but an echo is the ( Read more... )

my heart is breaking right now. Not from chancy or any relationship crisis but its just hurting. i dont understand people. why would u willingly throw your life away. it kills me to know its happening. can i help stop it? God please help. I know you can see the big picture of this but i cant and i just dont know what you want me to do. Do i tell ( Read more... )

God what do you want me to do.....its been thrown in my face and i dont know what i'm supposed to do with it. will it make things better or worse in the long run? God please tell me what to do. I need your direction. I'm just stuck in a corner. I dont know how to escape and its killing me....