Head banging?

[___evagination]

I am reading Good Nights by Dr. Jay Gordon. I just got done with the part with quotes from sleep-training books about how babies will cry so much they may vomit and how you should ignore it. (BAH! What mother actually listens to this advice?) Anyhow, right after that there's a shadow box about head banging. (Page 100 if you have the book.) It says

Comments

[shy_extravert]

I've found that even the experts aren't immune to occasional sanctimonious crap like "attached kids don't do blah" or "attached kids aren't blah."

I know (trust me, I know) that it's easier said than done, but if someone says "attached/co-sleeping/breastfed/whatever kids never/always blah" and your kid doesn't fit the bill, try to ignore it.

[ladycoreopsis]

Good advice!

We're not the best example because we don't 100% co-sleep anymore, but my 10mo is in and out of the family bed at night for nursing/nighttime snuggles and when he's sleeping he's in a crib at the foot of our bed. He likes to bang his head against our headboards in the morning. He is clearly making happy sounds and happy faces when doing so. He also enjoys thrashing his head from side to side (laughing as he does that).I used to wonder if something was wrong with him too, but when I see him developing normally otherwise, I just think it's something he finds amusing.

I like to blame it on my husband's love for heavy metal--some are born to be headbangers. :)

[hippydippymama]

By head-banging, he means kids who, when throwing a tantrum, will lie down or sit against a wall and do a very realistic impression of trying to bash their brains out.

Some kids do this every once in a while, when they really pitch a fit (and even AP kids do, it's okay!) but kids who have had a lot of trauma in their lives will do it constantly.

[katatonic_state]

Yup - my AP kid did that today when she was having a tantrum over... I actually don't remember what set her off. She's Two. That's reason enough some days, I guess. But yes, she was laying on the floor flailing and bashed her head on the carpet a couple of times. Thankfully, this time, she didn't give her self an abrated lip. (She did that a few months ago when she had a doozy of a tantrum). She doesn't head-bang often, but when she does, look out...

[hippydippymama]

Yeah, like I said, EVERY kid does it because EVERY kid is going to have the occasional really bad tantrum. But I do think it's safe to say that AP kids do it less, and they don't do it to the degree that say, a severely autistic kid would, or a kid who has *no* emotional support (like parents who think that every tantrum, no matter what, must not be given into and should be ignored from start to finish).

[bettyboot]

My favorite video for getting through those days was this. Tantrums suck but this is parental comedy gold.

[sprgtime]

My pediatrician said that babies bang their heads for rhythm (when doing it for fun/entertainment out of the blue) and that it is a sign of intelligence

[alohamelly]

My 16 months old who has been in bed with me since day 1 headbangs. He does it when he's frustrated or angry. It's unsettling but I have heard it's a passing phase.

[gossipwhore224]

This is why i feel like *all* parenting books can be a bit to much. There are no absolutes in parenting, ya know. Every kid is different.
My son has slept with us since day one and will shake his head back and forth because he figured out that food will go flying, by doing so.