A list of shamelessly biased reasons why you should help me
crazily power-vote (turn the music off by hitting pause in the blue player in the right sidebar, sorry) for Adam Lambert on American Idol this Tuesday!
1) Adam is a magical dark unicorn prince. No, really.
2) Okay, fine, he is not literally a dark unicorn prince. But he IS ludicrously talented and flamboyant and queer and weird and sweet and wonderful, and HELL YES that is an American Idol.
3) He turned Ring of Fire into a crazy sex song and pawed himself on the American Idol stage, he got a standing ovation from Mr. Smokey Fucking Robinson for Tracks of My Tears, he disco-danced to Play That Funky Music, he did gorgeous versions of Mad World and Feeling Good, he headbanged to Born To Be Wild, and he has explicitly promised he's "gonna give you every inch of my love."
3.5) That is, um,
quite a few inches. (WARNING: link goes to fully clothed and yet still possibly NSFW image!)
4) On a lame serious note, Bill O'Reilly is running his SECOND freaking homophobic hit piece of the year on Adam tonight, the night before the finale. *stabs him repeatedly*
and MOST IMPORTANTLY:
5) If Adam wins I will be deliriously happy and will write a lot of Kris/Adam fanfic!
And here is some as a taste! *bribes*
Winner Takes All (7,300 words)
Adam/Kris, and okay, basically, Adam/everyone
adult, explicit
Excerpt: It occurred to him belatedly that maybe he should've been saying no once in a while, but at this point he felt bad-obviously word had gotten around, so now if he turned somebody down, they'd feel like it was them specifically, which just seemed so mean. Like, how much of a hardship really was it to let someone jerk him off? Also, a lot of the offers tended to come right after he got off stage on performance night, and Adam could not personally name anything in the world that beat getting a blowjob five minutes after singing for twenty-five million people.
NOTE: I started this story before Rock Week and it has been totally jossed, so if you haven't been watching the show, I should alert you that I made up several of the performances in here and the voted-off order was different. Also, the large quantities of sex did not actually happen. Bah, reality.
(
Read the story!)
With heaps of thanks to
julad and
kaneko and
merryish and
cesperanza! <3
In closing I leave you with
this final devastating argument! (not by me, by some awesome but unknown person):
So help, help! and if you want more evidence of the joys of Adam and also Kris/Adam, I point you at the not even remotely safe for dialup or work glory that is the
profile of
ontd_ai.
♥