Advice wanted.

[happynoodlelady]

I've had to go to school a lot recently to help escort my daughter to and from class, the lunchroom, ect, because she will balk and refuse to move when instructed to do so. She laughs and runs away from her teachers. She has had a doctor's diagnosis of HFA for several years now, but the school still won't work with us on an IEP. When I asked the

Comments

[tooimpurenangel]

If they are speaking to you like this, I can only imagine the way she is being treated.
Maybe contact the Board of Education?

[happynoodlelady]

They told me she didn't qualify because her diagnosis isn't impeeding her ability to be educated. I tend to disagree if I am having to walk her to and fro every other day.

[azalynn]

WTF, that is totally ridiculous! But I know schools can be like that. Unfortunately everything I have heard about dealing with this kind of thing seems to involve parents having to be really, really persistent and be up on the relevant laws, etc. So if the situation is going to be fixed you're probably in for a lot of unpleasant meetings with school officials.

Is moving her to a different school an option?

[happynoodlelady]

Not really. All the other schools are overenrolled at the moment. And I'd prefer it if she was able to make it at this school because it's right across the street and we can't afford to transport.

[rainbow_goddess]

Lunch time and between classes are prime time for kids to be bullied. Anytime that a kid is not actually in class is the best time for bullies to strike. When I was in school I would be tripped in the hallways between classes, and bullies would knock my books out of my arms, and I'd have to stop and pick them up and be late for class because of it. I normally went home for lunch, but the rare times I stayed at school I would have things thrown at me, kids laugh at me, things stolen from me, etc. And no, the schools wouldn't do anything about it when it happened "outside of school hours."

[usebestattacks]

This is exactly what happened to me as a child/teen. Lunch time we were not allowed to leave the campus, so I would bring my own lunch and sit outside somewhere, to avoid being picked on. I also greatly hated the noise in the lunch room, it was deafening to me, another reason I avoided going inside.

[tooimpurenangel]

Same here.

[errantpenny]

This was true for me, too.

[gavinfox]

Being teased at lunch.

MASSIVE sensory overstimulation in a loud, rowdy lunchroom, to the point of intense physical pain.

[karalianne]

What others have said about bullying/teasing and sensory processing.

Also, it could be the transition is surprising her and she's not ready to make the shift without warning.

Laughing and running away is a fairly common reaction when you want to hide your real emotions or aren't sure how to express yourself appropriately. She may not have the words to tell them what's going on. (By which I mean that emotions are sometimes difficult to label correctly, and if she's at all nervous about "getting it wrong," she'll probably respond like this.)

Can you discuss it with her and find out what's going on (without asking her if certain things are happening, as those are leading questions - you need her to tell you the story in her own words)?