Time Travel Can Kiss My Arse

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Well, this is just excessive.As most of you will hopefully recall, last week future-me (now just-plain-me) dropped in on present-me (now past-me) due to a momentary temporal displacement thingy. Thingy's a technical term by the 51st century, so I'm told, but I'm not allowed to know precisely what it's a technical term for. Metasyntactic variables,

Comments

[rm]

Since you are presumably feeling vulnerable right now, this might amuse. Or perhaps really, really not.

http://kalichan.livejournal.com/142367.html

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Now this is a lovely way to wake up -- late in the morning and with an inbox full of erotica. I thank you! (Max would, but he's found some invisible creature to chase round the lino-floored kitchen. Oh the hilarity! scuttle scuttle scuttle SLAM. Poor lad.)

But here is my review:

I do not giggle! Nor do I squeal. I would protest this loudly, but I understand in "art" sometimes one must sacrifice veracity for the sake of smoking hot pornography.

All that being said, my highly advanced secret-agent training leads me to suspect one (if not both) of the authors of eating babies.

An excellent read, and exceptional use of Gwen's knickers.

[kalichan]

Or, if you want to work out some Max/Jack related aggression:
http://kalichan.livejournal.com/139777.html

[ask_captainjack]

His name is Theresa!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Well! That was erotic and disturbing.

Full points for grammar, margins, and characterisation; I'm going to have to go off and have a deep think about the rest. A long, slow think. Yes. Perhaps in the shower.

[lawsontl]

I wonder if FTD does Get Well bouquets with sachets of lube instead of balloons? Because if you can't walk now, Jack's going to make sure you can't walk by Monday.

[ask_captainjack]

THIS.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

I'm injured and still time-lagged!

Not that a dirty weekend isn't a lovely thought, but I would also like pancakes at some point, is all I'm saying.

[ask_captainjack]

Pancakes? Fine. Where's the can opener?

Actually never mind, I'm self-sufficient. I'll use my pocket knife. That's what I used to open beans during the war.

[51stcenturyfox]

Is this coffee_pot_tossed?

Most of mine are about Jack and the ex, so I'll spare you the angst.

[ask_aboutcoffee]

I would never toss a coffee pot. Even if they didn't break, they're fragile and would be damaged! And then all hell would break loose.

[51stcenturyfox]

I empathise re: coffee and destruction, so I'll offer up a quickie story. How do you feel about messy eaters?

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Well, I do not bake, but I suppose that ruins to conceit of the story a trifle (ha) so I shall merely suspend my disbelief. Excellent portrayal of our working relationship, and now I feel I must chivvy Jack out of bed and make him fetch scones and jam.

[woman_of_]

Oh Ianto please don't get jet-lag or time-lag or......well whatever!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

Too late! I am, however, sleeping it off nicely. And Rhys promised to bring me dinner later, though I think Gwen coerced him (possibly with sexual favours).

[woman_of_]

Oh yes, best way to coerced any man. on a promise and they are totally licked!

[ask_aboutcoffee]

In every sense of the word, if they know the right thing to demand.