Comments | ask_aboutcoffee: I can explain everything, I just choose not to.

ask_aboutcoffee

I can explain everything, I just choose not to.

May 27, 2009 08:56

Look, there's a very simple explanation for this. It's not what you think! I don't let him try to "cook" anymore. We both know it ends in misery ( Read more... )

jack harkness has nice teeth, torchwood is srs bznss

Leave a comment

Back to all threads

ask_arealdoctor May 27 2009, 15:25:21 UTC

Oh, Jack! The folic acid supplements are in your desk drawer. I'm afraid I let slip to Ianto. You really should have consulted him before you asked me to begin activating your uterus. It's not my place to interfere in marital spats!

ask_captainjack May 27 2009, 15:41:32 UTC

MY MANUTERUS. MY CHOICE! I'm just keeping my options open.

For a guy to get preggers I need more than folic acid. I also need a hose!

I'd draw you a diagram except that I'd be sharing medical procedures you're not ready to kn---HEY I could draw it for you and then you could have some retcon?

gwen_e_cooper May 27 2009, 15:47:29 UTC

Manuterus?

I'm keeping my hands out of your pockets for a while, Jack.

ask_captainjack May 27 2009, 15:59:34 UTC

Aw come on. Your uterus doesn't creep ME out.

Not even on the days when you are bitching and kicking table-legs and Ianto gets a warning txt from Rhys around 8am..."CRIMSON ALERT. CAREFUL 2DAY MATE!"

gwen_e_cooper May 27 2009, 16:12:59 UTC

Yeah, but I'm not gestating anything at the moment, Jack. See? No Nostro-bites.

And really? Rhys alerts you when I'm playing banjo in Sgt. Zygote's Ragtime Band?

IS THERE NO PRIVACY ANYMORE?

ask_captainjack May 27 2009, 16:16:26 UTC

Rhys alerts IANTO. They must have a Men who Love Heroes club or something.

Rhys never responds to my Facebook Group invites!

ask_aboutcoffee May 27 2009, 16:17:16 UTC

Rhys alerts you when I'm playing banjo in Sgt. Zygote's Ragtime Band?

Actually he just says "She's commanding Red October."

gwen_e_cooper May 27 2009, 16:57:46 UTC

I think we can stop... here. This can only end badly.

ask_aboutcoffee May 27 2009, 17:01:38 UTC

So I shouldn't mention Shark Week, then.

gwen_e_cooper May 27 2009, 17:04:39 UTC

Or vampires either, thanks!

We overshare at Torchwood, don't we?

ask_aboutcoffee May 27 2009, 17:13:18 UTC

I'm not sure you can call it overshare if it's the norm. We share efficiently!

ask_arealdoctor May 27 2009, 16:12:16 UTC

... a hose. I'm trying to imagine how that works and what purpose it would serve. I thought it was a simple matter of stimulating ovulation and preparing the uterus for implantation. When I scanned you during your physical I thought I saw a recto-uterine valve to facilitate insemination upon sufficient stimulation of the prostate, but perhaps I was wrong.

So yes, I would like an explanation, since I would be the one giving you pre-natal care. And no, I would not like retcon, for the same reason. .

ask_captainjack May 27 2009, 16:32:09 UTC

WHOA! Recto-valves? Where's the romance??? I haven't even thought of a gestation period yet. A manuterus can be set at Elephant or Fruitfly, you know.

oh_doask May 27 2009, 16:33:24 UTC

I WANT TO PRESS THE BUTTON! You always let me press the button!

ask_captainjack May 27 2009, 17:29:10 UTC

FINE.

BTW, Ianto's nose is not a button so stop smacking it to open doors.

oh_doask May 27 2009, 17:40:22 UTC

But it lights up with activation after!

It's a simple IF THEN ELSE!

Back to all threads