B5 FIC :: "Shattered Glass: A Journey - Part 9" [Susan/Talia, R]
INDEX & DISCLAIMER INFO { DW || LJ }
28 March 2263
jason's promises
never broken but the once
death instead of life
special circumstances meant
he and i could never part
The only information I have about how Jason and Talia became so intertwined is what they've shared with me. From what I understand, he hadn't intended to pour his entire consciousness into her as a separate identity; he'd only meant to share the gift of his enhancements with her. I know that I sound like a broken recording because I say this so damned often but, if it weren't for Jason Ironheart's presence, I never would have gotten Talia back in my life. I can never repay him for that, not if I have a thousand lifetimes to make the attempt. They share a bond I can never break, nor would I ever want to. Jason's presence helps when Talia's sanity is in jeopardy; he has soothed and protected her for so many years now.
Sometimes I can feel it when he's more present within her, but normally I can't. Thankfully, he has never been much of a voyeur when we are sharing the intimacy of our relationship. And I'm not just talking about the physical intimacies. With time, the telepathic connection between us has grown stronger, and we don't need actual touches to use it. Perhaps that's somehow related to my own latent telepathy, I don't know. Honestly, I don't care how it happens; I only care that it does happen for us. As time passes, and we grow closer, there are very few thoughts that I hide from her purposefully. I know that there are a great number of things she hides from me, but that's understandable, given what she's been through.
Delenn has even mentioned how much more at peace I am since Talia's come back into my life. I can't deny the veracity of her observation. Having Talia back, having her so close, has restored my faith in love. Oh hell, I never expected that I'd become such a romantic sap, but it's what she's brought out in me, and I won't fight it.
Clarification from Talia: Susan's right about one thing: Jason never intended to share consciousness with me when he used the last of his dying energy to transfer his enhanced gifts to me. If he did, he's lied and kept it from me for many years now. But it doesn't matter. He's here and I owe him my life. That should be all that matters.
In those first dark months before I knew fully what had happened with Control, I didn't know he was there. I hid in my tiny dark corner, gibbering incoherently and trying to figure out what was going on. I think he was subsumed into an equally tiny dark corner of my mind, as well. To this day, that is still such a strange thing to say. I retained my mind, my memories, but I didn't have control of my entire mind or my body. Does that really sound as insane as I think it does?
To be entirely fair, before that whole debacle with Control, I never knew that Jason had been transferred into my mind. I'd always just assumed that he'd given me his gifts and died. So, understandably, the first time I heard him talking to me as I cowered in that dark little prison cell corner of my mind, I thought I'd completely and utterly lost my sanity. I swore that it was some Psi Corps trick to get me to divulge information I didn't have on the Underground Railroad, and I refused to speak to him for the longest time. Or what seemed like the longest time, considering that time really had no meaning in my mind at that time. But Jason was patient with me, kept talking to me until I finally had to take the chance and just believe that it was him.
We were, and still are, both so grateful that I did take that chance.
Original post @ Dreamwidth with
comments. Commenting is welcome on either post.
28 March 2263
jason's promises
never broken but the once
death instead of life
special circumstances meant
he and i could never part
The only information I have about how Jason and Talia became so intertwined is what they've shared with me. From what I understand, he hadn't intended to pour his entire consciousness into her as a separate identity; he'd only meant to share the gift of his enhancements with her. I know that I sound like a broken recording because I say this so damned often but, if it weren't for Jason Ironheart's presence, I never would have gotten Talia back in my life. I can never repay him for that, not if I have a thousand lifetimes to make the attempt. They share a bond I can never break, nor would I ever want to. Jason's presence helps when Talia's sanity is in jeopardy; he has soothed and protected her for so many years now.
Sometimes I can feel it when he's more present within her, but normally I can't. Thankfully, he has never been much of a voyeur when we are sharing the intimacy of our relationship. And I'm not just talking about the physical intimacies. With time, the telepathic connection between us has grown stronger, and we don't need actual touches to use it. Perhaps that's somehow related to my own latent telepathy, I don't know. Honestly, I don't care how it happens; I only care that it does happen for us. As time passes, and we grow closer, there are very few thoughts that I hide from her purposefully. I know that there are a great number of things she hides from me, but that's understandable, given what she's been through.
Delenn has even mentioned how much more at peace I am since Talia's come back into my life. I can't deny the veracity of her observation. Having Talia back, having her so close, has restored my faith in love. Oh hell, I never expected that I'd become such a romantic sap, but it's what she's brought out in me, and I won't fight it.
Clarification from Talia: Susan's right about one thing: Jason never intended to share consciousness with me when he used the last of his dying energy to transfer his enhanced gifts to me. If he did, he's lied and kept it from me for many years now. But it doesn't matter. He's here and I owe him my life. That should be all that matters.
In those first dark months before I knew fully what had happened with Control, I didn't know he was there. I hid in my tiny dark corner, gibbering incoherently and trying to figure out what was going on. I think he was subsumed into an equally tiny dark corner of my mind, as well. To this day, that is still such a strange thing to say. I retained my mind, my memories, but I didn't have control of my entire mind or my body. Does that really sound as insane as I think it does?
To be entirely fair, before that whole debacle with Control, I never knew that Jason had been transferred into my mind. I'd always just assumed that he'd given me his gifts and died. So, understandably, the first time I heard him talking to me as I cowered in that dark little prison cell corner of my mind, I thought I'd completely and utterly lost my sanity. I swore that it was some Psi Corps trick to get me to divulge information I didn't have on the Underground Railroad, and I refused to speak to him for the longest time. Or what seemed like the longest time, considering that time really had no meaning in my mind at that time. But Jason was patient with me, kept talking to me until I finally had to take the chance and just believe that it was him.
We were, and still are, both so grateful that I did take that chance.
Original post @ Dreamwidth with
comments. Commenting is welcome on either post.