B5 FIC :: "Shattered Glass: A Journey - Part 1" [Susan/Talia, R]
INDEX & DISCLAIMER INFO { DW || LJ }
25 September 2262
darkness falls swiftly
sudden and deeply obscured
i am alone now
never again to be free
slave to this dominant bitch
I found this sitting on the nightstand the first morning after Talia had spent the night. We'd defeated Control. Okay, she and Jason defeated Control. I just didn't splatter her brains across my walls before Jason finally gave me the signal of their success. And yes, that morbid thought runs through my mind on a regular basis, even years after the fact. If I'm honest, it'll probably be there until the day I die.
Just knowing that she was back, that she wasn't dead, had me so damned lightheaded with relief that I still don't know how I kept from passing out. I didn't tell her I loved her that night. I wanted to, more than anything, but I held back. It would have been too much, too soon. It's the same reason we didn't sleep together that night. Well, we slept together, wrapped tightly around one another to stave off the fear that it was all just a damned dream. But sex was not involved, not for quite some time.
I have no idea where this first poem came from. We'd lain there in my bed, just talking, and kissing, and touching until deep into the night. We hadn't even bothered unpacking any of my things, outside of some bedding to sleep in. She didn't even want me to leave her for the quick two minutes it would take to use the bathroom. How -- When did she have the time to write that little poem?
I've never actually received an answer to that question, and I probably never will.
Clarification from Talia: I don't actually know when this stanza was written. I don't even remember writing it. Jason has always been surprisingly tight-lipped about some of the stanzas written, while expounding ad nauseum about others of them. The only possible explanation for this is that it's how I felt for two and a half years while trapped within my own mind, hidden from Control's knowledge and cruelty.
I remember coming into John Sheridan's office, seeing Susan and Michael there. I could feel Susan's anger aimed at Lyta, turned to say something and then… NOTHING. Just this empty, hollow darkness that pressed in on me from all sides. For the longest time, I didn't even know that Jason Ironheart was there with me. I didn't know what happened, only that I couldn't break free of the prison I was in. I could feel Her eventually, and Jason filled in the rest for me, but even that took many months before it could happen.
I wanted to be free, released from the horrors of that prison that kept me from total obliteration. Jason just wasn't strong enough to free us then. It had taken considerable strength for him to keep the two of us from being destroyed when Control took over. We spent months in hiding as he rebuilt his strength.
Original post @ Dreamwidth with
comments. Commenting is welcome on either post.
25 September 2262
darkness falls swiftly
sudden and deeply obscured
i am alone now
never again to be free
slave to this dominant bitch
I found this sitting on the nightstand the first morning after Talia had spent the night. We'd defeated Control. Okay, she and Jason defeated Control. I just didn't splatter her brains across my walls before Jason finally gave me the signal of their success. And yes, that morbid thought runs through my mind on a regular basis, even years after the fact. If I'm honest, it'll probably be there until the day I die.
Just knowing that she was back, that she wasn't dead, had me so damned lightheaded with relief that I still don't know how I kept from passing out. I didn't tell her I loved her that night. I wanted to, more than anything, but I held back. It would have been too much, too soon. It's the same reason we didn't sleep together that night. Well, we slept together, wrapped tightly around one another to stave off the fear that it was all just a damned dream. But sex was not involved, not for quite some time.
I have no idea where this first poem came from. We'd lain there in my bed, just talking, and kissing, and touching until deep into the night. We hadn't even bothered unpacking any of my things, outside of some bedding to sleep in. She didn't even want me to leave her for the quick two minutes it would take to use the bathroom. How -- When did she have the time to write that little poem?
I've never actually received an answer to that question, and I probably never will.
Clarification from Talia: I don't actually know when this stanza was written. I don't even remember writing it. Jason has always been surprisingly tight-lipped about some of the stanzas written, while expounding ad nauseum about others of them. The only possible explanation for this is that it's how I felt for two and a half years while trapped within my own mind, hidden from Control's knowledge and cruelty.
I remember coming into John Sheridan's office, seeing Susan and Michael there. I could feel Susan's anger aimed at Lyta, turned to say something and then… NOTHING. Just this empty, hollow darkness that pressed in on me from all sides. For the longest time, I didn't even know that Jason Ironheart was there with me. I didn't know what happened, only that I couldn't break free of the prison I was in. I could feel Her eventually, and Jason filled in the rest for me, but even that took many months before it could happen.
I wanted to be free, released from the horrors of that prison that kept me from total obliteration. Jason just wasn't strong enough to free us then. It had taken considerable strength for him to keep the two of us from being destroyed when Control took over. We spent months in hiding as he rebuilt his strength.
Original post @ Dreamwidth with
comments. Commenting is welcome on either post.