(Untitled)

[apiphile]

It's frequently hard to tell what is sensible caution and backing out of a situation before it can do you too much damage, and what's strangling something in its infancy due to characteristic self-sabotaging defeatism designed to prevent happiness or success.

Joys of being a lunatic, I suppose.

Comments

[twelve_pastels]

Uh, no, no, I think that's actually pretty common to humans in general (or at least this human).

[lunalelle]

It's something I struggle with all the time. When am I being reasonably suspicious and when am I being paranoid? When am I being a hypochondriac and when am I being cautious and proactive about my health?

These are all lines that other people don't seem to know for sure, and yet they call us crazy?

[apiphile]

They're really hard ones to call. I imagine most other people don't know there's a line there at all, though.

[wolfy_writing]

It's frequently hard to tell what is sensible caution and backing out of a situation before it can do you too much damage, and what's strangling something in its infancy due to characteristic self-sabotaging defeatism designed to prevent happiness or success.

I can imagine. "Do I want to bail on this because it's genuinely best to stay away, or because (insert bad reason here)" is hard enough with a fairly sane brain. Dumping BPD on top of things has to make things extremely confusing.

Is this a general observation, or is it about something specific?

[apiphile]

It was about something specific, which I think was the usual BPD saboteur-brain, but it remains the case for so much other shit. I have a tremendous habit of shooting for things half-arsedly because going for them properly would entail the potential for failure, whereas half-arsedness means DEFINITE failure but it's okay because I wasn't really trying. See also: everything ever.

[wolfy_writing]

Ah. Yeah, I think that's a pretty common problem. The fear that trying as hard as you can and failing somehow makes failure extra-bad. (Logically, it should be the other way, because if you try and fail you've merely failed, but if you don't try and you fail, you've failed and wasted your chance, but human brains are rarely logical even before you add BPD.)

[shadowvalkyrie]

It's frequently hard to tell what is sensible caution and backing out of a situation before it can do you too much damage, and what's strangling something in its infancy due to characteristic self-sabotaging defeatism designed to prevent happiness or success.

Story of my life. You could ask friends (or just anyone outside the situation) for advice, though. And often just telling someone helps catching yourself at mental biases.

[apiphile]

At present it seems rather like "getting sleep" seems to have resolved this one.

[swear_jar]

Just a brain thing or a brain thing about something specific? :(

[apiphile]

Something specific, which in the cold light of day is almost certainly BPDist "you like this thing, it would be a shame if someone I E YOURSELF fuck it up, so why not fuck it up now!"

[swear_jar]

Ah, yes. Best don't fuck it up now whatever it is, then. :(. No strangling things for not very good reasons.