Soon this journal will be for those who i think are special.
So if you can not read any entries past this one guess what...
...You are not special.
And also you are not on my friends list.
So if you would like me to think that you are special ask me.
Chances are that i will say no.

the first day at the mental institute was great. we had blood test, urine test, breathalizer test, td-tb one of those test, and then we had group therapy, then break, then lunch, then another break, then another group session then gym and played vollyball then went home. every one in my groups are dealing with anger management. gots to go.

i wish she liked me. but then again i hope she doesn't, because what there might be will never be able to grow. it will sit and probably just decay. i don't want that to happen ( Read more... )

does anyone know what makes me happy? because i can not think of anything. i think i have forgotten, or there never was anything ( Read more... )

i have had one of the most depressing days if not the most depressing day of my entire life. it started out wonderfull and went downhill from there...now its slowly going back up.

i want to call her sooo so so badly but im nervous as hell.
i have her number in my phone
all i have to do is press send.
her phone will ring she will pick up.
hopefully i'll talk to her and make her laugh,
tell her all the news of tomorrownight
and ask her for a group trip to the park to have tea.

i hate it when friend who care for me ruin my dreams, but i love it at the same time because they do it so that i don't make a huge mistake.

she gave me her number..."just incase" hehe. she is like the coolest person i know.

things are beginning to worsen, i think so. you think things after a while will start to lessen up and become easier for a little while. but they don't things continue to become bad. its your brain teasing with your emotions ( Read more... )

i feel myself becoming more and more paranoid as the night continues

I hate it when people tell me who i can like. and i hate it even more when i take their word for it ( Read more... )