Rumination with a gold fish.

[ant_farm]

I am meant to be meditating on safety and hiding. This is a problem for 2 reasons. I struggle with meditation. Being mindful is rather agonising for me. I try I struggle and I rarely succeed. So meditation usually pisses me off because I zone out and all of the sudden I have to be present in all of the bullshit that is around me. Eeep see there I

Comments

[invig]

I think mediation and a bad memory go together.

I think meditation disturbs and distorts the brains normal emotional mechanisms, and interferes with memory formation as a result (my brother has a shocking memory and he meditates, so the sample size is restricted to one, sorry)

I think there might be a deeper problem u need to solve.

PS: I only skim read yr post (tired as I am) but if u wish I can read it in detail.

[ant_farm]

How curious.

I think there is quite a bit of research that would suggest otherwise with the meditiation and bad memory. However, I tend to concur with your empirical knowledge. Having gone to hippy school for quite a few years and observed their hideous fish bowl memories and inclinations to meditate.

My post are just whingey self indulgent stuff. I tend to repeat myself alot, so its probably best to skim.

Are you someone I know or a random?

[invig]

Yeah but regarding that research I think they are reflecting the fact that simply relaxing oneself is better than feeling stressed out. So meditation allows the mind/body to relax, but when taken to extremes, it interferes with mental operation.

Its especially bad when used as a band-aid for deeper problems. Which everyone tends to have, at least to some extent from my experience (something to do with an individualistic society). But the stress ('negative emotion') is not completely undesirable. It is your mind telling u that reality is not correlating well with your internal models of how the world 'should' work. Meditation is good for managing the stress short term, but it IS a message that should not be ignored. That could be why so many hippies have such childish views of the world: they have not challenged their beliefs in a systemic fashion and matured their ideas by doing so.

Self indulgent? Thats what blogs are for ;)

I'm a brother of look_a_unicorn. So if u know him, i guess I'm not random.

[ant_farm]

Thanks for your comments they are thoughtful which is nice to see. I am intrigued by what you are saying about there being an incongruence in what one thinks of the world and what the world actually is resulting in stress. I have been letting my brain stew with that for a while. I definately see that in a lot of angry people's lives. (I think hippies can be quite angry people)

I think my current negative emotion has to do with me not wanting to accept nihlism. Trying to understand that I need to be selfish sometimes inorder to live more effectively and happily.