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[angstbunny]

For the first time in over a year, words in my head kept me up at night. Hell, that I got words in my head at all, period. As long as I can remember, I'd visualize and verbalize/narrate scenes in my head. Sometimes it's a writing thing, and sometimes it's just an imagination/fantasy thing. It's been quiet for over a year now though, which... I don'

Comments

[idleleaves]

I don't want to call it an existential crisis, butI think it can seem like one, though. Because yeah, like you said, when it's been such a huge part of your life and when there have always been those voices and images and mental film strips and scenarios, it's just... IDK, fucking strange and empty and all kinds of fucked-up to not have that constant stream in the head. Or at least it was, at first--I totally understand about the baking, because knitting/spinning/weaving filled that creative void, for me. It's still a creative activity, it has measurable results, and, as a bonus, it's kind of way less frustrating than writing. ... It also doesn't provoke nearly the same intensity of feeling (ha) as writing, but sometimes that's not a bad thing

[angstbunny]

YES. THAT. ALL OF THAT. TOTALLY. LIKE I CAN'T ADD ANYTHING OTHER THAN "WORD YES"

t's still a creative activity, it has measurable results, and, as a bonus, it's kind of way less frustrating than writing. ... It also doesn't provoke nearly the same intensity of feeling (ha) as writing, but sometimes that's not a bad thing.

THIS TOO. Definitely hell yes to the measurable results. And lol yes, a thousand times less frustrating. Though I've never set off my fire alarm with my writing, hahahaha. Ahem.

The muscle analogy is apt. I need a mental workout. Perhaps.

And LOL yes, the "wow I wrote this" can go either way.

[idleleaves]

Though I've never set off my fire alarm with my writing, hahahaha. Ahem.

LMAO. Hard to do that with a pen, regardless of how fast you write.

The muscle analogy is apt. I need a mental workout. Perhaps.

I wish I could remember how I got mine back. I'm not convinced it was something I did actively, though, but I do remember that it took, well, a while. And it's still not operating at full efficiency, heh.

... Okay, I can't resist saying this: SEEKER IDEAS. ♥

[angstbunny]

Or even with typing! LOL.

And sometimes it just happens. Not necessarily the functional aspects, like the piecing together of sentences and stuff, but the urge and inspiration. It's more spontaneous.

I've had one fic idea for a looooooooong time, but it'd be difficult to pull off. A more recent idea is so fucking epic, and that scares me off, because it'd be such hard work even if I had momentum. It's epic AU, which is so typical of me, haha.

[one_more_cherry]

I relate to the whole baking-replaces - with baking, you know when you're DONE. With writing, there's the constant possibility of fine tuning and rewriting.

*Roots for you to try editing something for your own pleasure, anyway*

[angstbunny]

EXACTLY. You make it, you bake it, you eat it. Finito. But with writing, there is so much more. Writing, rewriting, editing, revising, giant possibility of never finishing. Baking is so much easier.

[one_more_cherry]

Writing = the merry-go-round of creative exercises, you're so right. BUT I JUST SAW THE CLOWN NEXT TO THE CORN DOG STAND!

[angstbunny]

I agree with pretty much all of that, and I think I've had that happen to me quite a few times throughout the course of my fic writing years, but I don't tihnk that's what's happening to me now. I'm not sure how much I can attribute it to a substantial change in my real life circumstance, though it'd definitely be foolish of me to discount it entirely. But the last year/year and a half have been significant and tumultuous, so. Maybe I just need time to regain my footing. Or it is entirely possible that something has substantially shifted in me. I don't like the idea of "outgrowing" writing, that it's been a "phase," because it would make it sound like a childish endeavor. But there are periods in a person's life as well, like cycles of the moon or whatever. What is different now does not necessarily imply that what came before was immature or insignificant. But I haven't figured out yet just what this is.