Hello, again.

The first warm day of Spring used to feel like renewal and dread. It was the wind on my face when I got out the door and drove that tan Accord to school. Thinking like I have freedom now. I was probably thinking about Scott. Who was probably not thinking about me. But he did. Year later when I got out of his car and went in my apartment. In a ( Read more... )

I think it was that I had to figure a lot of things out. Like the music I liked. Or who to talk to. I drove at night. South. To meet up with Lenny. I don’t remember what we did. But it was a far drive. And I did it after everyone had gone to bed. We would plan it. And I recall the smell of coconut oil. That I didn’t like. There’s that sinking ( Read more... )

I feel like I need to tie a rope around my waist before I go out there just so I can find my way back. And I should really to go back every night. But perhaps doing that won't get me where I have to go. Or would it? Maybe going home every night could be good for me ( Read more... )

I’m forgetting a lot. Need to make more memories. Maybe better memories this time. Work gets in the way.

I’m sick of doing things I don’t want to do. I feel like I don’t have control. But do we ever? I mean the fact that lack of exercise could make you feel this way just means that it’s all cause and effect.

I put the pork belly to use tonight. Made kimchi fried rice. It wasn’t supposed to be that hard but it was.

I swore off pork for a year after having too much pork belly on New Years Eve once. It was a good idea at the time but I ended up with a headache.

I feel cold. How do I get out of here?

The guy behind the counter asked me if I had any preference. I told him the one closest to me and I apologized since he had to reach over to get it. He said that's the reason they put it up front. Last time, he offered to cut up lamb shanks for me because I was desperate for lamb stew meat. There was no shank in the back after all. But I see him.

I cursed an old woman today. She deserved it. I said, "Happy new year; I hope you die today" and other things.