Today I looked at the moon.
I saw the stars
Shining
Compared to the beauty of the sky, I am nothing

In and out of love
So easily
or
"I'm an addict for dramatics
I confuse the two for love"

I need to spend less time telling myself I'm broken
Less time making excuses for my actions
And more time fixing it

I've fallen off track
Today I get back on

How is it I can be so affect by a strangers pain, but so cold to the people I love?
How is that possible?

Today I'm wondering if, in part, people decide to have children because they believe they can shape the child to be better than they were? To be kinder, or more outspoken, or some characteristic the parent feels they lacked?

How very sad. Not the idea, but the fact that it can not be done.

I can barely breathe. I feel like my excitement and energy is going to choke me. I feel it rising to the bottom of my throat.
 i think i need help. an hour ago i felt like jumping out the window, right now i feel as though i can fly.

i feel trapped
i feel trapped by reality
trapped by time
by gravity

why is the world this way?
why do you have the ability to dream so big? to want so much? to feel so much if we are stuck here in this box

i can dream bigger than this world
bigger than the moon
the stars

why cant things be as i imagine? why cant i go back and forth in time? why cant i make ( Read more... )

Autumn. I feel the cool breeze on my face. It blows through my hair. It wicks away the sweat between my fingers, cooling them. The sun is setting. It shines through the leaves. Farewell sun.
My heart aches.It's just a dull ache now. It's as if my heart knows releif is coming.
Goodbye. Goodbye cold fingers. Goodbye tears. Goodbye hatred in my heart. ( Read more... )

The regret on how I live my life is overwhelming.
Do other people feel this way?

Why do I feel so distant from others? Why do I have a thick, impenetrable wall up all the time?
How is it that others can let people in so easily? How do they make friends and form meaningful relationships in a blink of an eye?
How did I get to be so damaged?
Why am I so ( Read more... )

Life needs a rewind and a fast-forward button.
It needs to be one of those "chose your own adventure" books

Sometimes I wonder if life is like a movie -- by the end you can see how the beginning and middle fall into place.
And other times i am reminded that it is more like jumping from cliff to cliff -- if you chose the wrong path it's a long fall ( Read more... )

Mirror Mirror
On the wall
How much longer
'Till we fall?

Will we rise or
Will we crawl?
Make your choice for
Death will call.

Strange feeling:
Being hungry and debating if I should eat or work out
But this strange feeling is a result, not the whole picture

I feel like a failure
and I feel helpless
I feel that I've lost control
and I feel alone

Something is conflicted inside
I can sit for hours
watching the two sides battle