Perception of Normal Societal Expectation

[angel_gidget]

Okay, perhaps I'm opening a can of worms by bringing up feminism/politics again, but I'm curious...

A lot of militant feminists state that society expects them to eventually get married and have children and that this expectation annoys them to no end. When they say this, they always seem to imply that this isn't expected of men. Is that true?

Comments

[milleniumrex]

Yeah, it's all about heteronormative expectations. I do think there's a bit more casual societal pressure, but if you're not conforming to the "life plan" by a certain age, you get the disapproving eye from people, regardless if you're male or female.

I'm starting to get the "when am I getting grandkids?" speech from my mom. @_@

[angel_gidget]

Sheesh. I'm only 22. My parents don't even bother to ask if I'm dating anyone. They just assume I'm not.

[geministar01]

Hm, most of the pressure I see is more about getting through college than finding a mate. Of course, I'm also going to school in a fairly liberal city. Back home it was generally expected that the pressure was put on women to find a good man; and the pressure was put on men to BE a good man, ie, settle down with a steady job and support the family whether you like it or not. More often than not this means oil field work.

It also depends on the cultural norms. I noticed a lot of deviation in the expectations of dating depending on minority in my high school. For example, the hispanic students dated very seriously and always had an eye turned towards marriage - they were expected to get married fairly soon after high school. It wasn't quite so serious for the white or black students, who were expected to have fun with high school dating and get married during/after college.

Personally, I'm still reeling over how many of my friends seem to be getting married already.

[angel_gidget]

Personally, I'm still reeling over how many of my friends seem to be getting married already.

I hear ya on that one. Or when you have a friend who's having a baby... or if its just someone you know... kinda makes me stop and think a moment.

In my case, almost all the pressure is on college and career. My father doesn't seem to think I'll have any sort of dating life until I get further along with my weight loss. Personally, I think he's a least a little bit wrong. While it has improved my self confidence, it hasn't' improved the quality of male company in my environment. I only have 1 semester of college left. I think it unlikely that I'm going to find "Mr. Right" in that short (and busy) period of time.