"Sevenfold" Green: Wrath

[an_ardent_rain]

Yugioh "Sevenfold" next bit
Seto/AnzuHe wrote his name on the blackboard in smooth, deadly strokes - as though he had an assassin’s hand

Comments

[the_sweet]

I'm not sure why you WOULDN'T like it; it's certainly post-worthy, and I'm glad you shared this glimpse of it with us. I think "Wrath" was conveyed quite well, not just with Anzu's imagined what she'd like to do to Kaiba, but the breaking of the pencil and her attempt to introduce the textbook to his face

[an_ardent_rain]

Thank you for your comments! You really actually got to the root of it and explained it in a way I don't think I could have. I can write things with depth (which in a lot of ways is the purpose of "Sevenfold"), but seeing beyond the surface? Not my strong point.

I think I didn't like it because it wasn't humor - that is what I feel most comfortable with, and when things aren't funny I tend to get a little insecure about it.

I probably would expand it (if I edited at all), but I'm not sure what I could add without it seeming contrived.

You did see the chapter in livejournal - I try to post here first, generally.

I think posting bits and pieces is a good idea. It helps me, at least - heh. I always find it's a good way to look at each piece separately, and that, in turn, helps me fit them together better.

^^