I think i am losing weight. I never weigh myself and very rarely look in the mirror, so it's an unusual thing for me to notice. When i moved to Germany from Canada i think i might have lost a little bit of weight because the serving sizes are smaller, but probably not very much. I did notice a small change when i started walking to work every day. ( Read more... )

Last weekend I realized I was coming up on my 4 week limit and would need to head back over to Hong Kong to refresh my passport stamp. So Sunday i bumbled over the border and stopped in another small district in the New Territories called Fanling. Unlike Tai Po - the site of my previous HK excursion - this one had a mountain right next to the train ( Read more... )

So, you all know by now that Guangdong province was hit by three typhoons in the past few weeks, only one of which was relatively serious. They dumped a lot of rain, though. The closest i got to disaster was the glass door of the coffee shop blowing out while i was inside. I did splash through a lot of ankle-deep puddles, but for the most part ( Read more... )

I am not sure what happened to me last night, but i woke up like i got hit in the head with a brick. The typhoon really did throw us all for a loop. Something like 12 people died, mostly in Macao/Zhuhai on the western side of the delta (Hong Kong/Shenzhen are east side). One of my teachers showed me a video of a small town where pretty much all the ( Read more... )

I tell you what. I was feeling a little mopey when i wrote that last entry, partly still remnants of the Saturday hangover, partly disillusioned by the latest round of neo-Nazi violence in the US, but mostly just feeling a bit like i had wasted my weekend. So i decided to climb the mountain i can see from outside the front of my hotel. I just ( Read more... )

Still struggling with getting out of bed. It makes me so frustrated. I feel like such a loser when my partner is getting up by 7am to head into school every morning and i can't even get myself up before noon to start my half-assed day of part-time work. And yet at the very same time a part of me is just longing to wrap myself tighter in the sheets ( Read more... )

So i know i said i've been trying to get to bed by 1, and in the past few days i've even been in bed before midnight, but tonight J is away and it's the weekend, goddamnit, so here i am ( Read more... )

So part of the problem is this. I like too much stuff. I was just at drum class and i've pretty much hit the point where i need to put in an hour a day of drills or resign myself to being a drum circle hippie for life. It's the same stage i got to with guitar when i gave it up in favor of electronic music. Even now i can still pick up a guitar and ( Read more... )

I don't know if it's really come out in my writing the last couple weeks but things have been extremely fucked in my head. Last week my new shrink didn't want to send me home because i accidentally let slip part of my plan for killing myself. I was feeling kinda divorced from reality when it spilled. "Derealization", he said. Meanwhile in the ( Read more... )

I've been an odd mess the last couple months. Since February i've been wavering in and out of a pretty bleak depression. It's not particularly dark, and it's not completely debilitating, but it's very fucking frustrating. I'm fulfilling all of my commitments, but not pushing any further. This week i was in the gym fives times, i went to school, i ( Read more... )