how to turn the corner?

[amw]

I am still in the funk that i got into when i posted about clothes, and i know i should not have done that, because clothes continue to be one of the things that send me on massive anxiety spirals. You'd think twentysomething years later i would have gotten over it, but no, i have not. I fucking hate buying clothes, i hate that i can never, ever

Comments

[olamina]

Your description of what the developers job actually is is the BEST description I've ever seen. Succinct and true and perfect. Ugh, I wish I'd come up with that! I will gladly and gleefully quote you and give you full, well-deserved credit

[fflo]

I wish I had something useful to say, other than that sucks and thanks for the food pix.

The other day my friend who's now the Wordle editor ran BLIMP. I'd already been thinking about her care not to trigger people with offensive words (in crosswords as well as in Wordle) when I tried EVICT as my first guess, thinking she probably wouldn't run that, cuz it's just such a shitty thing. And then I realize it was gonna be BLIMP.

I did decide to go ahead and tell her how shitty that word feels to me, even though she gets all this craptastic feedback on Wordle all the time & doesn't need to hear about it from her buddy. But I didn't convey to her how it really set my day off on some spiraling emotional tanking. Which I pulled out of, grateful to say. But I hated being sabotaged like that, and I hate being vulnerable to my own thoughts or experiences doing such a thing to me.

Recovery is good for this sort of thing, as is therapy. Maybe part of why I got out of the tank pretty quick was getting my ass to a recovery meeting that evening

[picosgemeos]

I'm finally catching up with LJ. I hope your mood has improved since this post!

I know what you mean about how comments online can knock us if we are already in a bad mental place. I got into a chat with someone on Facebook about Substack and by the end, he was making it sound like I was a Nazi sympathiser. I had to let it drop as we had many friends in common, but it did leave me feeling like I hadn't expressed myself well.

then i'll die too, unnoticed by everyone, but at least it will have been amongst things i love.

We'll keep your memory alive here on LJ! Online pilgrims will regularly come visit your LJ and pay respect. ;-)