money and identity

[amw]

Something i have been trying to write about for a while but never found the space is this issue of net worth and class

Comments

[mymimikyu]

I've loved following your story and I hope you don't mind me putting my two cents here! Would you consider living in some little town, and working part time? You could live well for a few years off of it, or live comfortable for a while if you also do part time. Especially if you don't want to dive into that upper middle class lifestyle. It's basically what I'm doing, living on savings while putting away my part time income and I think it's working well enough.

[amw]

This is a great idea, and it's an idea i am currently floating. I have lived in a few small towns in my life, long enough to know that i am definitely a big city person. But in these corona times, a lot of what makes big cities good is not open (restaurants, clubs, bars etc), so perhaps taking a while to hunker down somewhere smaller might help me to get a better appreciation for the lifestyle. I suppose sooner or later most i might end up in a small town anyway because cities keep getting less and less affordable.

[mymimikyu]

Agreed, I'm living in the family house in the suburbs, walking distance from only a small gas station/cafe/fast food block and bicycling distance from more shopping and food, but no bars or movies or things like that. Not super fun, however, I'm so happy that we have a house in the middle of a good sized yard, as do the neighbors. We don't have to see or deal with people unless we want to (or have to, for grocery and such). But, you know, pros and cons. I'm just hoping that working from home part time will be a legit option when I enter into the job market in a couple years.

[king_of_apathy]

This made me think about my own relationship to money and background. Like you I grew up middle class, and set to receive more money by accident of birth than many of my peers. There was a time in my late teens and early twenties when that made me very uncomfortable, though that's mostly faded away by now. But it's got me thinking that i'll write up my own entry about it soon.

[dadi]

A few years ago - before 2008 - I'd just have told you to shuttle it somewhere it gets you a decent amount of interest every year without risk and then forget about it until you need it for a reason and continue your normal life. But nowadays safe places where to put money are kind of... not existing any more

[enna_ssu]

That is really good advice, thank you.

[amw]

The thing i find uncomfortable about this is implying that people need to independently amass several hundred thousand, maybe a million in assets in order to not be a burden when they retire. I find that outlook really depressing

[enna_ssu]

Perhaps I misunderstand what your problem here is, but what do you compare this "broken society" to

[belleweather]

I feel similarly about my pension -- I will be able to retire at 57 and make at least what I'm making now, for the rest of my life. I'm the only person in my community who has that freedom; my boyfriend will probably have to work until he dies. I don't work harder than any of those people, I just ended up working (and being really fucking good) at one of the few jobs that still has those kinds of benefits. I think a lot about that

[amw]

I definitely think that having lived in different countries exacerbates all this weirdness around identity and class. It's not even just the difference between one country and the other one, it's also the expat experience vs the local experience, as you have described well in the past when it comes to schools.

I wonder if my discomfort with wealth is related to my discomfort with owning "stuff". And, specifically, if that is a result of having moved around so much that i paradoxically feel less secure when i have more stability in my life. Like, lurching from one place to the next without really knowing what's happening next, it's incredibly stressful, but it's also what i feel like is my default state. When things look like they are going to settle down, when i see those creature comforts on the horizon, then i start panicking because i don't know how to deal with it.