A Smile Full of Light
Title: A Smile Full of Light
Fandom: Heroes
Rating|Genre: g | gen (family)
Characters|Pairing: Elle, Eleanor and Bob Bishop | Eleanor/Bob
Summary: Elle has very few memories of her mother, but sometimes she has a dream that maybe is a real memory.
Word count: 969
Spoilers|Warnings: No
Prompt: 052. Mother at 100_women.
Notes: Just a very short oneshot about Elle’s “unnamed mother”. I don’t pretend to understand how in the world Bob managed to get himself a loving wife, but I suppose there must have been something he did right at some point…
Eleanor Bishop had a smile that was full of light; that was one thing her daughter knew for sure. Elle had very few memories of her mother, but sometimes she had a very vivid dream. It felt so real that it had to be if not a memory then at least based on one.
When she asked Bob if he remembered the day her grandpa died, a sunny day and they had had tulips in a vase on the table, he said: “I don’t know, Elle. That was a long time ago. And I don’t see why it is important; forget about it and focus on the present.”
So she wasn’t sure. The tulips could be from another memory. In her dream, it was a sunny morning and it felt like they had breakfast together, but perhaps it hadn’t happened during breakfast, perhaps it had been during lunch time? Did her parents usually have lunch together? Another stupid, irrelevant question.
In her dream it had been a sunny morning. Her mommy had been talking on the phone, using big words, and she sounded sad.
“Bob”, she said a long moment after she had hung up, “my father is dead.”
“Is he?” Elle’s daddy looked up briefly from the newspaper. “Yes, he was very old. I’m sorry for your loss, Eleanor. I suppose we’ll have to take care of the funeral as soon as possible.”
Elle remembered (at least according to her dream) her mommy turning to her, rolling her eyes, exasperated.
“And there he goes, back to the paper. Thanks for the emotional support. What if I died, would you react the same way?”
Mommy stared at daddy until he lowered the newspaper and Elle could see his face again. She did not know if her parents had spoken of death before, but something about her mother’s tone of voice sounded familiar.
“Don’t be absurd, Eleanor. I hardly knew the man; I only met him a handful of times and he didn’t even recognize us these past couple years. Why should I express a grief I don’t feel?”
Eleanor took a deep breath as if she was going to shout, but when she spoke, her voice was low, almost too soft.
“Because that’s what you do, Bob. Because I feel it.”
Little Elle, in the dream, did not fully understand, but when she was awake she did and she felt her mother’s pain and was sorry for the loss of the man she could not remember at all no matter how hard she tried.
There were no photos from her mother’s childhood.
“You are unreasonable”, said Bob. “I said I was sorry for your loss.”
“Yes, and you didn’t bother to even try to sound like you meant it!”
“Eleanor, I don’t understand you”, Bob replied, but Elle’s mommy didn’t listen anymore; she lifted Elle out of her chair and began walking with her to the kitchen door.
“Where are you going?” Daddy asked, and Elle could see over her mommy’s shoulder that he was confused.
“We’re going to the park. Want to come with us?”
Daddy’s eyes were still confused but they did not meet Elle’s, they were fixed on the back of the woman who was carrying her.
“Why?” he asked.
“Because it is a beautiful day”, mommy said, “and some fresh air would be good for you. Not to mention how good it would be for all of us if you took the opportunity to take care of your daughter for a while.”
“Why”, said daddy, “does she need to be taken care of? Are you going away somewhere?”
“Forget it!”
Mommy, who had been standing still with her back turned to Elle’s dad, began to walk again.
Little Elle, hanging over her mother’s shoulder, thought that she understood the expression of her daddy’s face (when grown up Elle was awake and thought about the dream she wasn’t so sure) when he said:
“Eleanor… I love you… But you know that. I don’t know why I said it.”
Elle’s mother paused for a moment.
“Yeah. I know. And the worst part is that I actually think you mean it.”
When they were outside, mommy put Elle down and took her hand. As they began to walk away from the house, Elle said:
“Daddy is sad.”
“No, darling, he’s not”, her mother replied.
“Daddy is sad”, Elle insisted.
Her mommy was quiet for a long while and then she looked down at Elle with a smile that was, perhaps, even more sad even if it was also full of light. (Awake, grown up, Elle thought that even if everything else in the dream was a fake memory, that part of it was real.)
“Darling, daddy is not really sad, and that’s the problem. No matter how strongly he feels about some things, no matter how hard he tries, there’s a place within him that is empty. And he can’t reach it, and he doesn’t know how to reach other people from it, not by himself. But I am here for him, Elle. And for you. You and I are going to take care of him together, as much as we can.”
“Together”, Elle replied.
Was it, perhaps, shortly after that that her mommy had died? She couldn’t remember. There were lots of things that she couldn’t remember, but she supposed that she had tried to take care of her daddy just like her mother wanted. But she had been very young, and he had been very distant (at least she supposed so; grown up Elle knew that he must have always been the same) and she had not known what to do.
She could only suppose that even if she looked a bit like her mother, she had not inherited her smile that was full of light.
Fandom: Heroes
Rating|Genre: g | gen (family)
Characters|Pairing: Elle, Eleanor and Bob Bishop | Eleanor/Bob
Summary: Elle has very few memories of her mother, but sometimes she has a dream that maybe is a real memory.
Word count: 969
Spoilers|Warnings: No
Prompt: 052. Mother at 100_women.
Notes: Just a very short oneshot about Elle’s “unnamed mother”. I don’t pretend to understand how in the world Bob managed to get himself a loving wife, but I suppose there must have been something he did right at some point…
Eleanor Bishop had a smile that was full of light; that was one thing her daughter knew for sure. Elle had very few memories of her mother, but sometimes she had a very vivid dream. It felt so real that it had to be if not a memory then at least based on one.
When she asked Bob if he remembered the day her grandpa died, a sunny day and they had had tulips in a vase on the table, he said: “I don’t know, Elle. That was a long time ago. And I don’t see why it is important; forget about it and focus on the present.”
So she wasn’t sure. The tulips could be from another memory. In her dream, it was a sunny morning and it felt like they had breakfast together, but perhaps it hadn’t happened during breakfast, perhaps it had been during lunch time? Did her parents usually have lunch together? Another stupid, irrelevant question.
In her dream it had been a sunny morning. Her mommy had been talking on the phone, using big words, and she sounded sad.
“Bob”, she said a long moment after she had hung up, “my father is dead.”
“Is he?” Elle’s daddy looked up briefly from the newspaper. “Yes, he was very old. I’m sorry for your loss, Eleanor. I suppose we’ll have to take care of the funeral as soon as possible.”
Elle remembered (at least according to her dream) her mommy turning to her, rolling her eyes, exasperated.
“And there he goes, back to the paper. Thanks for the emotional support. What if I died, would you react the same way?”
Mommy stared at daddy until he lowered the newspaper and Elle could see his face again. She did not know if her parents had spoken of death before, but something about her mother’s tone of voice sounded familiar.
“Don’t be absurd, Eleanor. I hardly knew the man; I only met him a handful of times and he didn’t even recognize us these past couple years. Why should I express a grief I don’t feel?”
Eleanor took a deep breath as if she was going to shout, but when she spoke, her voice was low, almost too soft.
“Because that’s what you do, Bob. Because I feel it.”
Little Elle, in the dream, did not fully understand, but when she was awake she did and she felt her mother’s pain and was sorry for the loss of the man she could not remember at all no matter how hard she tried.
There were no photos from her mother’s childhood.
“You are unreasonable”, said Bob. “I said I was sorry for your loss.”
“Yes, and you didn’t bother to even try to sound like you meant it!”
“Eleanor, I don’t understand you”, Bob replied, but Elle’s mommy didn’t listen anymore; she lifted Elle out of her chair and began walking with her to the kitchen door.
“Where are you going?” Daddy asked, and Elle could see over her mommy’s shoulder that he was confused.
“We’re going to the park. Want to come with us?”
Daddy’s eyes were still confused but they did not meet Elle’s, they were fixed on the back of the woman who was carrying her.
“Why?” he asked.
“Because it is a beautiful day”, mommy said, “and some fresh air would be good for you. Not to mention how good it would be for all of us if you took the opportunity to take care of your daughter for a while.”
“Why”, said daddy, “does she need to be taken care of? Are you going away somewhere?”
“Forget it!”
Mommy, who had been standing still with her back turned to Elle’s dad, began to walk again.
Little Elle, hanging over her mother’s shoulder, thought that she understood the expression of her daddy’s face (when grown up Elle was awake and thought about the dream she wasn’t so sure) when he said:
“Eleanor… I love you… But you know that. I don’t know why I said it.”
Elle’s mother paused for a moment.
“Yeah. I know. And the worst part is that I actually think you mean it.”
When they were outside, mommy put Elle down and took her hand. As they began to walk away from the house, Elle said:
“Daddy is sad.”
“No, darling, he’s not”, her mother replied.
“Daddy is sad”, Elle insisted.
Her mommy was quiet for a long while and then she looked down at Elle with a smile that was, perhaps, even more sad even if it was also full of light. (Awake, grown up, Elle thought that even if everything else in the dream was a fake memory, that part of it was real.)
“Darling, daddy is not really sad, and that’s the problem. No matter how strongly he feels about some things, no matter how hard he tries, there’s a place within him that is empty. And he can’t reach it, and he doesn’t know how to reach other people from it, not by himself. But I am here for him, Elle. And for you. You and I are going to take care of him together, as much as we can.”
“Together”, Elle replied.
Was it, perhaps, shortly after that that her mommy had died? She couldn’t remember. There were lots of things that she couldn’t remember, but she supposed that she had tried to take care of her daddy just like her mother wanted. But she had been very young, and he had been very distant (at least she supposed so; grown up Elle knew that he must have always been the same) and she had not known what to do.
She could only suppose that even if she looked a bit like her mother, she had not inherited her smile that was full of light.