Anywhere Else But Here (Chapter 24)
Title: Anywhere Else But Here (24/?)
Author: badenoughforyou
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Jalex and others
Summary: Jack has grown up in a world where music is a felony. It was believed to influence kids too much. Jack had never known the beautiful world of music. That is, until the day the beautiful Alex Gaskarth walked into his life and showed him the truth behind music. The beauty everyone had been hiding from him for so long.
Disclaimer: I don't anyone, okay? Title cred goes to Simple Plan.
A/N: Okay, so it's been FOREVERRR since I've updated and I feel hella bad, but I've been very busy, so forgive me. :( Fuck school. Anyway, enjoy. :)
All Alex could see was Jack, broken and lying in a pool of his own blood. Alex couldn’t believe his eyes. No, this couldn’t possibly be real. He couldn’t have possibly lost another person. He felt his legs shaking as he walked towards the boy he loved so much, hands shaking, head spinning. His blood turned to ice when he saw something glint.
Thrown away from Jack’s outstretched hand was a gun, silver and gleaming maliciously in the pale moonlight. How could Alex not have heard? How could he have not felt it? They say when someone you love dies, you just know and it feels like the world has just shattered.
That’s how Alex felt now; completely and utterly broken, never to be put back together again. He stumbled to his knees next to the boy, feeling warmth seep into his jeans. But he didn’t care. He could never care about anything ever again. Not now.
He brushed aside the matted hair on the boy’s head and was intending to kiss him, but he couldn’t. He simply put his head on his chest and sobbed like he’d never sobbed before. He couldn’t take this. He couldn’t take the pain.
Alex was never strong. Who was he kidding? He was nothing without Jack.
He looked at the deadly weapon that had taken his love’s life and lifted it with shaking hands. He felt the trigger, smooth and cold under his touch. He checked the inside. One shiny bullet still remained. He almost smiled at his luck.
He didn’t have to leave Jack after all. He lifted the barrel to his temple, feeling the cool metal. It was almost serene, an escape. He squeezed the trigger, but felt nothing. He heard nothing: Nothing but his name.
“Alex!” He heard. It was Jack. He knew that instantly, but upon looking back at the boy, he was still very much motionless.
“Lex! Wake up!” Jack cried again and suddenly he was being shaken awake. He looked around, dazed. The first thing he saw was the look of complete and utter distress on Jack’s sweet face. He looked as if he’d been crying, his eyes puffy and red.
“Alex…” Jack said, holding him close and biting his lip. “I thought you were dying or something… You were yelling and…” Jack said, voice shaking. Alex came to the realization that he was sweating buckets and his cheeks felt wet from crying.
He breathed in, realizing now that it was a horrible dream. He hugged Jack like he’d never see him again and let the tears back up.
“P-please don’t leave me… I know I’m a nutcase and this whole thing sucks… b-but never leave me, Jack…” Alex cried, barely able to understand himself. Jack held him closer.
“You are nuts… for thinking I would ever give up on you…” Jack said softly, brushing his fingers through Alex’s hair and calming him more. He had no idea what had caused Alex to react the way he did. He had no idea what awful dream he could have had, but he wasn’t about to ask and make him relive it.
Alex’s breathing had returned to normal after a while. He swallowed hard and looked into the doe eyes of the boy opposite him.
“H-how’s Cass?” He asked, feeling his heart start to race again at the thought of her. Jack’s face turned grim. He felt awful. He didn’t want to have to tell Alex.
Jack looked down at the ground and back up at Alex, feeling his lips quivering. He couldn’t bring himself to put it into words.
“She’s dead, isn’t she?” Alex said suddenly, more calmly than he had expected. The look in Jack’s eyes confirmed the dread within. Suddenly Alex felt as if he was just going to puke everywhere. He held onto Jack as he dropped to his knees and started to cry again. He never thought he’d have enough tears for this kind of shit.
But at a certain point, you just can’t cry anymore. You have to do something.
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“Fuck, Jack! I need to talk to Mark. I’m perfectly sane right now, okay?” Alex argued as Jack pleaded with him.
“No, Alex. You have no idea what you’re talking about. None of us do. And chances are, your plans will get us all killed.” Jack said as he pushed Alex back against the hallway wall. Alex just heaved a sigh, feeling his throat constricting.
“Don’t you see this is killing me, Jack?” Alex asked, barely audible, pressing himself to the taller boy, hoping he’d give in.
“You don’t think I feel the same way?” Jack asked, more forcefully than he’d intended. He felt pent up emotions breaking through like a hairline crack on an aquarium. “What the fuck are we going to tell Rian? How the fuck do you think I feel about one of my best friends being dead? Your little rebellion won’t bring her back, Alex. Nothing will…” He said, feeling tears bubbling up. Jack was still at a stage where he was in denial.
“What’s going on?” John asked softly as he stepped out into the hallway. He looked as if he’d aged about ten years. He was so worn and tired looking. It broke Jack’s heart to see someone usually so full of zeal so… dead.
“It’s nothing…” Alex said, brushing off Jack’s outburst. How could he blame him? There was no way.
“Mark wants to see you…” John said, his voice quivering a bit. Jack nodded and took Alex by the hand, feeling like he would fall down if he didn’t.
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They came upon Mark sitting outside the venue, muddy and exhausted. Josh sat beside him, looking as if his world had just been completely destroyed. Mark looked up, and stood, brushing off his jeans.
“I figured… I figured you had seen enough.” Mark said, clearing his throat. Alex’s eyes wandered to a pile of dirt a few yards away. He almost laughed because they had made it so far and he had expected Cassadee to outlive all of them. But he didn’t make a sound.
Jack watched as Alex hauntingly walked over the mound and sat next to it, laying his head on it and sighing.
“Cass… can you hear me?” He asked, to the surprise of everyone else.
Everyone was silent for a while, just listening. In what seemed like hours, they all realized that life can’t be taken for granted. Sometimes we break and sometimes even your best friends can’t save you from the choices you make.
“I’m so sorry…” Alex whispered, not even caring that he was getting filthy. He didn’t care about anything anymore. He felt hollow. “I’m so sorry I-I didn’t see it…” Alex said, swallowing hard.
And everyone remained silent.
“You don’t even know… you don’t know how much you meant to me. Even though I only knew you for such a short time…” Alex said, feeling his words just spill out. “What I’d give to see an old Cass… s-smile… Just one more time.” He said.
He felt a hand on his shoulder as Josh lowered himself next to him.
“I think I loved her more than a lot of things…” Josh said quietly. Alex looked at him and couldn’t help but just pull the British boy close to him. They sat there embracing, feeling the power of emotion.
And Alex could have sworn he heard that tinkling laugh once more.
Author: badenoughforyou
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Jalex and others
Summary: Jack has grown up in a world where music is a felony. It was believed to influence kids too much. Jack had never known the beautiful world of music. That is, until the day the beautiful Alex Gaskarth walked into his life and showed him the truth behind music. The beauty everyone had been hiding from him for so long.
Disclaimer: I don't anyone, okay? Title cred goes to Simple Plan.
A/N: Okay, so it's been FOREVERRR since I've updated and I feel hella bad, but I've been very busy, so forgive me. :( Fuck school. Anyway, enjoy. :)
All Alex could see was Jack, broken and lying in a pool of his own blood. Alex couldn’t believe his eyes. No, this couldn’t possibly be real. He couldn’t have possibly lost another person. He felt his legs shaking as he walked towards the boy he loved so much, hands shaking, head spinning. His blood turned to ice when he saw something glint.
Thrown away from Jack’s outstretched hand was a gun, silver and gleaming maliciously in the pale moonlight. How could Alex not have heard? How could he have not felt it? They say when someone you love dies, you just know and it feels like the world has just shattered.
That’s how Alex felt now; completely and utterly broken, never to be put back together again. He stumbled to his knees next to the boy, feeling warmth seep into his jeans. But he didn’t care. He could never care about anything ever again. Not now.
He brushed aside the matted hair on the boy’s head and was intending to kiss him, but he couldn’t. He simply put his head on his chest and sobbed like he’d never sobbed before. He couldn’t take this. He couldn’t take the pain.
Alex was never strong. Who was he kidding? He was nothing without Jack.
He looked at the deadly weapon that had taken his love’s life and lifted it with shaking hands. He felt the trigger, smooth and cold under his touch. He checked the inside. One shiny bullet still remained. He almost smiled at his luck.
He didn’t have to leave Jack after all. He lifted the barrel to his temple, feeling the cool metal. It was almost serene, an escape. He squeezed the trigger, but felt nothing. He heard nothing: Nothing but his name.
“Alex!” He heard. It was Jack. He knew that instantly, but upon looking back at the boy, he was still very much motionless.
“Lex! Wake up!” Jack cried again and suddenly he was being shaken awake. He looked around, dazed. The first thing he saw was the look of complete and utter distress on Jack’s sweet face. He looked as if he’d been crying, his eyes puffy and red.
“Alex…” Jack said, holding him close and biting his lip. “I thought you were dying or something… You were yelling and…” Jack said, voice shaking. Alex came to the realization that he was sweating buckets and his cheeks felt wet from crying.
He breathed in, realizing now that it was a horrible dream. He hugged Jack like he’d never see him again and let the tears back up.
“P-please don’t leave me… I know I’m a nutcase and this whole thing sucks… b-but never leave me, Jack…” Alex cried, barely able to understand himself. Jack held him closer.
“You are nuts… for thinking I would ever give up on you…” Jack said softly, brushing his fingers through Alex’s hair and calming him more. He had no idea what had caused Alex to react the way he did. He had no idea what awful dream he could have had, but he wasn’t about to ask and make him relive it.
Alex’s breathing had returned to normal after a while. He swallowed hard and looked into the doe eyes of the boy opposite him.
“H-how’s Cass?” He asked, feeling his heart start to race again at the thought of her. Jack’s face turned grim. He felt awful. He didn’t want to have to tell Alex.
Jack looked down at the ground and back up at Alex, feeling his lips quivering. He couldn’t bring himself to put it into words.
“She’s dead, isn’t she?” Alex said suddenly, more calmly than he had expected. The look in Jack’s eyes confirmed the dread within. Suddenly Alex felt as if he was just going to puke everywhere. He held onto Jack as he dropped to his knees and started to cry again. He never thought he’d have enough tears for this kind of shit.
But at a certain point, you just can’t cry anymore. You have to do something.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
“Fuck, Jack! I need to talk to Mark. I’m perfectly sane right now, okay?” Alex argued as Jack pleaded with him.
“No, Alex. You have no idea what you’re talking about. None of us do. And chances are, your plans will get us all killed.” Jack said as he pushed Alex back against the hallway wall. Alex just heaved a sigh, feeling his throat constricting.
“Don’t you see this is killing me, Jack?” Alex asked, barely audible, pressing himself to the taller boy, hoping he’d give in.
“You don’t think I feel the same way?” Jack asked, more forcefully than he’d intended. He felt pent up emotions breaking through like a hairline crack on an aquarium. “What the fuck are we going to tell Rian? How the fuck do you think I feel about one of my best friends being dead? Your little rebellion won’t bring her back, Alex. Nothing will…” He said, feeling tears bubbling up. Jack was still at a stage where he was in denial.
“What’s going on?” John asked softly as he stepped out into the hallway. He looked as if he’d aged about ten years. He was so worn and tired looking. It broke Jack’s heart to see someone usually so full of zeal so… dead.
“It’s nothing…” Alex said, brushing off Jack’s outburst. How could he blame him? There was no way.
“Mark wants to see you…” John said, his voice quivering a bit. Jack nodded and took Alex by the hand, feeling like he would fall down if he didn’t.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
They came upon Mark sitting outside the venue, muddy and exhausted. Josh sat beside him, looking as if his world had just been completely destroyed. Mark looked up, and stood, brushing off his jeans.
“I figured… I figured you had seen enough.” Mark said, clearing his throat. Alex’s eyes wandered to a pile of dirt a few yards away. He almost laughed because they had made it so far and he had expected Cassadee to outlive all of them. But he didn’t make a sound.
Jack watched as Alex hauntingly walked over the mound and sat next to it, laying his head on it and sighing.
“Cass… can you hear me?” He asked, to the surprise of everyone else.
Everyone was silent for a while, just listening. In what seemed like hours, they all realized that life can’t be taken for granted. Sometimes we break and sometimes even your best friends can’t save you from the choices you make.
“I’m so sorry…” Alex whispered, not even caring that he was getting filthy. He didn’t care about anything anymore. He felt hollow. “I’m so sorry I-I didn’t see it…” Alex said, swallowing hard.
And everyone remained silent.
“You don’t even know… you don’t know how much you meant to me. Even though I only knew you for such a short time…” Alex said, feeling his words just spill out. “What I’d give to see an old Cass… s-smile… Just one more time.” He said.
He felt a hand on his shoulder as Josh lowered himself next to him.
“I think I loved her more than a lot of things…” Josh said quietly. Alex looked at him and couldn’t help but just pull the British boy close to him. They sat there embracing, feeling the power of emotion.
And Alex could have sworn he heard that tinkling laugh once more.