I can't eat. My head's starting to have a headache. I want to go walk and get some exercise but I'm too damn anxious. &%$#&%$#

Hell, I'm gonna eat, I don't want to go and deprive myself or something stupid like that. I'm just stressed out and I have a lot on my mind.

This is still bothering me.

What if Sam re-enlists while he's overseas? That would mean he wouldn't come here with the business he co-owns in Michigan. He wouldn't be moving to Florida then. I don't even know if they're gonna be here anytime soon. I haven't asked him about it because I don't want to seem like I'm trying to force the idea on him. But dammit, I want to be ( Read more... )

I'm so nervous about him being deployed. I hate that anxious feeling. I mean, I know how long he'll be gone for, and it's really not that long at all... but I can't help it. I worry all the time about the important people in my life. Ugh.

I hate the fact that I won't be able to see him before he leaves. :(

I read the Sgt. Grit newsletter and this just, well.. see the title of this post.

( Article w/ picture that brought me to tears )

So I don't have to go in to work til 8:30 today. I didn't even realize how nice it is to have an extra 15 minutes of sleep until now. I feel very refreshed. Tired, but still refreshed. I'm also very happy to have found a gas station that carries a cappuccino I actually like. It's French Vanilla. It doesn't come out all watery like some other ( Read more... )

So yeah. Saturday I was supposed to go home. I hated the fact I had to leave. But I did. Got a picture of Sam and I (will post later, maybe), and I wanted a t shirt of his cuz I'm not gonna see him for a while. Absence makes the heart grow fonder right? Well, it's only been 2 days for me since I got home and.. well, that saying is so true. ( Read more... )

Well, good news: I made it home. Bad news? Duh. I'm home. :\

I had such a fantastic time in Colorado with Sam. There's SOOOOOOOOOOO much to talk about, but I'm in kind of a blah mood.. so I'll write what I can and leave the rest for later.

Well, I got in last Tuesday.. as soon as I got out of the rental car I made a beeline straight for Sam ( Read more... )

I'm home. Trip was more than awesome... but I'm too damn tired to go on about it tonight. Will let yall know more in the A.M.

Had a dream where it was the day he was getting deployed. It was weird. I dreamed I saw him and 2 other guys being driven to an AF base in a car by someone.. someone's dad I think. He had his helmet on and goggles. But I was waiting wherever it was that you'd wait at to say goodbye or something. He finally got there, and I was waiting by the door. ( Read more... )