Comments | alcoholit: 26. pre-drunken monopoly, post twilight torture

alcoholit

26. pre-drunken monopoly, post twilight torture - he's pissed.

Jan 04, 2010 12:06

VAMPIRES OF THE BARGE! AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT.

PLEASE. TELL ME THAT YOU DO NOT SPARKLE AND ARE NOT SEXUALLY REPRESSED WEIRD SEXISTS. PLEASE. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, TELL ME YOU DO NOT SPARKLE.

That is all.

p.s. Loki, you're a pathetic little creampuff. Stay out o' my library. The library. Me and Aziraphale's joint owned venture of booky-

the books are never appropriate, i hate twilight, constantly drunk, caps lock bernard, living in fiction, declarations of intent

Comments 130

deathmerciful January 4 2010, 13:23:49 UTC

Am I to understand you believe the immortal damned to have illuminescent property or radiate an aura in the correct light?

alcoholit January 4 2010, 13:26:14 UTC

...uh.

Well, I'm rather hoping NONE of you do that. Got to check.

(The comment has been removed)

alcoholit January 4 2010, 13:45:06 UTC

Vampires. The general population. Nobody should sparkle.

Thread 12

tadwizard January 4 2010, 13:32:38 UTC

I did a thorough investigation. All the vampires here are not sparkly and are even less sexually repressed than I am.

alcoholit January 4 2010, 13:37:33 UTC

Then all is well on the Good Ship Insanity.

irockatduckhunt January 4 2010, 13:52:39 UTC

Oh, Christ. Twilight ain't real.

alcoholit January 4 2010, 13:53:54 UTC

You never know around here. YOU NEVER KNOW.

irockatduckhunt January 4 2010, 13:55:45 UTC

Heads will roll if that's true. literally

Hm. You know how many vampires are roamin' around here exactly?

alcoholit January 4 2010, 13:58:54 UTC

No idea, but this'll probably serve as a good, if slightly indignant, census.

thegooddrjones January 4 2010, 13:54:02 UTC

Oh no. Twilight. God I hate Twilight.

alcoholit January 4 2010, 13:55:07 UTC

Loki tied me up and read it to me.

I could have written something better, and people don't take my manuscripts unless they're written in ten foot braille.

thegooddrjones January 4 2010, 14:23:31 UTC

I'm sorry. That must have been awful.

And I'm fairly sure I could do better as well and I haven't written a story since I was playing with Barbies.

alcoholit January 4 2010, 14:30:39 UTC

It was terrible. I think I've got PTSD.

I'm damn pleased it's not out in my world yet.

Thread 11

young_idealist January 4 2010, 15:59:28 UTC

I am so sorry for Loki. Is it alright if I get him books from the library?

alcoholit January 4 2010, 16:03:12 UTC

Yeah, get what you like, no problem, I just don't want to be TIED UP AGAIN.

young_idealist January 4 2010, 16:05:20 UTC

I completely understand. Did he actually harm you in some lasting way? I didn't realize what he was doing.

alcoholit January 4 2010, 16:06:03 UTC

Noooooo, only mentally scarred me with terrible literature. You know how it is.

Thread 9