Embarassed by a Word.

[aimeejmc]

I have two English classes this semester - Lit Crit and Creative Writing. I like the class Lit Crit - lots of short stories, but not the paper-writing. Creative Writing is ... being taught by a woman who is getting her PhD in Poetry and therefore needs to teach a class or something for it. So we've been doing a lot of poetry. FOr those that know me

Comments

[hilleviw]

If reading the poem evoked such strong feelings and so much thought, doesn't that indicate that using the N word was an effective choice?

And yes, you did right. Everyone there knew you didn't choose the word.

[ex_fashioni]

Honey, the author chose the word for a reason. It's not up to you to edit it for your own comfort.

I'm facing the same thing in the current WIP. It's set during the Civil Rights era and the characters are going to be traveling through the south. I'm going to have to use it in order to remain true to the spirit of the time and make the piece feel as authentic as possible.

And I'm TERRIFIED.

You're not shit for saying it. You're a student, you're learning--even from the uncomfortableness of the experience.

[ste_noni]

What does Doblerize mean? I've seen it used at b.org before but I'm unclear on what it means.

As for saying the N word, you were reading an assignment that was given by your teacher. This is just my opinion, but I actually think it would have been sort of inappropriate to skip it or edit it out. Yes, it's an offensive word, but it's not Aimee's offensive word, it's the author's.

[stephl]

In Say Anything, Lloyd Dobler was at a party and was in charge of all the car keys of the people who were drinking, so they wouldn't drive drunk. Some completely wasted guy came up to him bellowing drunkenly about how he needed his keys, and Lloyd grabbed him and yelled, "You must chill! YOU MUST CHILL!!! I have hidden your keys!"

Doblerize = chill the fuck out, IIRC.

[cariadusclan]

agree with everyone here but i also think that it could have been appropriate to have a discussion about the use of the word and the discomfort you and other students may have had with verbalizing that word. having it be out in the open may have eased the tension a bit. but then, like hilleviw says, the word is meant to evoke emotion. and evoke it did. and does.

[stephl]

That's the one word that white people (or the vast majority of white people) are taught NEVER to use. So even if you're reading it aloud from a poem that someone else wrote, about the Civil Rights movement, no less, of course you're going to balk at it. It doesn't matter that *you* didn't write it yourself; it's a damn radioactive word.

I can think of many words -- many racial epithets -- that are just as bad, and yet people are much less hesitant to use them. So, like hilleviwsaid, I think that choice of word for the poem was used for its power. And I think that reading it aloud was the right thing to do. It would be a disservice to the author to dilute his words.

The world of book-larnin' is a tricky thing, aint it?