[fic] Just Don't Look Back, Chapter 07 - Yugioh, YamixYugi, angst/romance, R, AU
Title: Just Don't Look Back
Chapter: 07
Author: Chey (duelist_gurl163)
Rating: R
Genre: Angst/romance
Pairing: YamixYugi
Archive: Here
Overall warnings: AU, implied sex, insanity, violence
Spoilers: None.
Summary: Before he met Yugi, Yami spent his days panhandling alone. Yugi put his heart into changing Yami’s life, giving him companionship, a home and his love. But even he can’t save Yami from the control of his past, nor the dark path he is set upon.
Disclaimer: Yugioh continues to not belong to me.
- 01 - 02 - 03 - 04 - 05 - 06 -
---
The next morning, Yugi awoke feeling odd. It took him a minute to remember the night before. His confession. Their kiss.
His cheeks went red. Happiness and uncertainty battled inside him as he tested out the thought, I have a boyfriend.
Didn’t he? Technically he and Yami hadn’t come right out and agreed they were dating…Yami hadn’t said much of anything after the kiss, really, other than a quiet, “good night” when Yugi had left. But…they had both agreed to having feelings for each other. That was close enough, wasn’t it?
Unless, sometime overnight, Yami had changed his mind.
Fear replacing his happy feelings, Yugi jumped up and hurried downstairs, not even bothering to change clothes. He found Yami sitting stiffly at the table, Yugi’s mother hovering nearby.
“Good morning Yugi,” she said, causing Yami’s head to shoot up. He and Yugi met eyes, then he looked back down at his glass of orange juice.
“Hi Mom. Um, Yami, can I talk to you?”
Yami nodded and got up, following him back up the stairs. As soon as they reached the landing, they both spoke at once:
“Yugi, about what-”
“Yami, are we-”
They both stopped, and Yugi assumed by Yami’s silence that he was supposed to go first. So he tried again, “Are we…technically dating now? After what happened? I mean, if…if you still feel the same, then dating seems…like the natural thing now, right?”
Yami looked uncomfortable. “I- I guess.”
“You guess what?” Yugi asked nervously. “That we should date? Or that you…feel the same? Because if you don’t-”
Yugi was even offering him an easy way out. All he had to do was say, I’m sorry, last night I was just confused, I think we should only be friends.
Instead, the fool he was, he shook his head. “No. I meant…about dating. But it’s fine. If you think we should…then we can.”
“I just need to know what to tell my friends,” Yugi said, hope returning. “If this is going to be a relationship, then…I think they need to know. But I don’t want to spread any information around that you aren’t comfortable with.”
“It’s fine,” Yami said, swallowing. “It’s fine, you can tell them.”
Yugi smiled shyly at him, and reached out cautiously to take his hand. Then he leaned in and placed a fast kiss on Yami’s lips, causing both their faces to flush, but earning him a quiet smile back.
“I have to go get ready for school,” Yugi said, his heart pounding again as he turned and hurried back to his room.
Left where he was, Yami groaned slightly. Scratch that, he wasn’t a fool. He was a hopeless, happily drowning fool.
- - -
“Yami and I are dating.”
His announcement, probably the biggest announcement of his life so far, was met with blank stares.
“You and Yami are what?!” Honda demanded.
“Dating.”
“As in…you’re a couple?”
Yugi nodded.
“When did this happen?” Anzu asked, eyes wide.
“Last night. I…I’ve been thinking for awhile about how I feel and last night I decided to talk to him,” Yugi said, figuring he’d might as well get the whole story out. “And we talked, and…” He wasn’t sure they were ready to hear about kissing yet. “He feels the same.”
“Isn’t this going kind of fast? You only met him two months ago.”
“But I’ve spent days just talking to him about everything. And we’ve lived together for awhile now and I know his whole history,” Yugi replied to her. “It doesn’t feel like he’s such a stranger.”
“So you’re gay?”
Leave it to Jounouchi to cut straight to the chase. Of course, he was the one who had always loaned Yugi heterosexual smut videos in the past. No wonder he was confused. Yugi shrugged. “I don’t know. I think bi would be the right term. I’m still figuring this out too. I just know…I like Yami as more than a friend. This is what I want, I’m happy.”
As he had expected, he was beginning to see acceptance in their faces. But there would be no celebrating, no slaps on the back, no “hey, that’s great!” He hadn’t expected any, but it still dampened his happiness. He would have at least liked their support.
“Really, this is a good thing,” he said. “I know you had a rocky start with him, but…you’ve seen him in the store since then and you know why he freaked out, so it’s all okay now, right? He cares about me, that’s got to mean something, doesn’t it? And I’ll still have plenty of time to hang out with you guys, things will barely change at all, you’ll see.”
“It isn’t like we can really tell you what to do,” Anzu said. “It’s your life, your choice of…partner.”
“I know, but your support still means a lot,” Yugi said hopefully.
She took a deep breath. “Then I support you. I mean, if you two are happy…then why not?”
He looked over at Jounouchi and Honda, who both nodded in agreement with her.
“Never thought you’d be the first one among us to have a real relationship,” Honda finally said, making them all laugh.
It wasn’t exactly an enthusiastic endorsement, but Yugi was willing to take it.
- - -
A week later found Yami and Yugi sitting on Yami’s bed Monday evening, arms around each others’ shoulders as they cuddled. As long as they kept their voices low, they would be able to hear anybody coming down the stairs in time to assume a more innocent scene. Yugi still wasn’t sure how he would tell his parents.
He snuggled up closer. “Hey, Yami?”
“Hm?”
“I’ve been wondering, what does your mother look like? And your father?”
“Well…” He paused. “I’m not very good at descriptions, what if I showed you a picture?”
“You have pictures?” Yugi asked, sitting up as Yami knelt to rummage through his belongings.
“Only a few. We were allowed to go back into the house for belongings after the aftershocks subsided, but part of it had completely fallen in…we were only able to save a few.” He straightened up, holding an envelope, and shook out the photographs. With his back to Yugi, he shuffled through them and slid one back into the envelope before turning and handing the rest over. “Here…it was taken a long time ago, but you get the idea.”
Yugi took the pictures and smiled at the top one. He took a moment to study the tall woman and rather shorter man, noting similarities between their traits and Yami’s, but his eyes were drawn to the small boy standing between the two adults. Yami’s younger self beamed through missing teeth at the camera. “How old were you?”
“Seven, I think.” His cheeks reddened. “Focus on my parents, alright?”
Yugi shuffled through the stack, grinning particularly broadly at one of a smiling woman holding a baby with unusually coloured hair, and then handed them back. He saw Yami glance at the pictures as he put them away, and noticed the look in his eyes. Once Yami had settled back beside him, Yugi leaned his head on his shoulder and whispered, “You miss your mom, don’t you?”
Yami sighed. “I suppose it isn’t very cool for an eighteen-year-old to say he misses his mother. But after everything, with her being the only family I have…yes, I do.”
“Well, she’ll get out soon and then you can live together again,” Yugi said cheerfully.
Yami didn’t reply, just glanced down at the floor. His voice seemed sad. “Yeah.”
Gently, Yugi stroked a lock of Yami’s hair. “It’ll be alright.”
He smiled and hugged Yugi closer. “I’m glad you believe in that.”
Yugi snuggled against his chest, gazing up into his eyes. “I know it might be too early for me to say this, but I…I want to. I love you,” he whispered.
For a moment Yami closed his eyes, letting the words sink in along with all the feelings they brought. He wanted to remember this feeling forever, wanted to burn it into his memories so that nothing could erase it. “I love you, too,” he started to whisper back.
He only made it as far as “I lo-” At that moment he opened his eyes and looked down to see a corpse staring back at him. Half its face was pasty and streaked with blood, the other half crushed and unrecognizable as human.
He felt his heart begin to pound in his ears.
I love you.
And suddenly he was back at that day, cradling a broken, cold body, sobbing too hard to breathe.
I love you.
The corpse stared back, its single light-brown eye fixated, unseeing, forever.
With a sudden cry, he released the figure and threw himself off the mat, sliding across the floor on his knees, his right hand pressed over his mouth as the room spun and a wave of nausea overtook him.
“Yami!”
He fought back the bitterness in his throat, and slowly the room came back into focus.
“Yami? Are you okay, are you sick? Should I get help?” Yugi was kneeling beside him, one hand on his shoulder.
Slowly he lowered his hand. “Some water…would be good,” he said hoarsely.
Grateful for something helpful to do, Yugi jumped to his feet. “Water, okay. I’ll be right back. Don’t move.”
As Yugi’s footsteps faded up the stairs, Yami curled where he was. What was that? He had been feeling just fine - happy, even. Happy emotions had never caused this before!
Is it because of trying to say…?
Softly, under his breath, he said, “I love y-”
That was as far as he got before he felt cold, creeping sickness in his chest, forcing him to stop.
“Here, I got water,” Yugi said, skidding back into the room and crouching down to hand him the glass. Yami took it, taking a few gulps to clear his throat.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled.
Yugi folded his legs, staying close by, peering at him with concern. “Do you want to tell me what happened?”
“I don’t know what happened.” He set the glass down. “But I can’t…I can’t say those words.”
“What words?” Yugi said, confused. “You mean ‘I love you?’”
Slowly, Yami nodded.
Yugi was silent for a long moment, not knowing what to make of that. He felt worried, confused…slightly disappointed even, because he would have loved to hear those words from Yami. But one look at Yami’s pale face told him this was no act.
“It’s okay,” he finally said. “You don’t have to. I mean…I know that you love me. I guess there’s no reason why you should have to say it if it…causes something like this.”
Yami tried to smile at him, and his voice was calmer as he said, “Thank you for the water,” but there was no way to erase his expression. And it was his expression that worried Yugi most of all.
- - -
“Hey Yugi, what’cha doing?” Jounouchi asked, clapping him on the shoulder. Yugi jumped.
“Jounouchi! Don’t sneak up on me like that.”
“Sorry. What’s on the computer that’s so fascinating?” he said, peering over Yugi’s shoulder at the screen. “Post-traumatic stress disorder…no way, don’t tell me you’re actually doing that science essay a week before it’s due. Your mom’s nagging about procrastination must have finally gotten to you.”
Yugi shook his head. “It’s not for the project, just research for myself.”
Jounouchi pulled up a chair. “Research for what?”
“For Yami. Do you know anything about post-traumatic stress?”
“Sure, they talked about it in that war documentary Hiroki-sensei showed. Soldiers get it.”
“Not just soldiers.” Yugi scrolled down the page. “There are tons of other reasons people have it. Including disasters.”
“Oh…I think I know what this is about now.” Jounouchi leaned against the table. “But what’s the big deal? Yami already told you he had problems from the earthquake, that’s not news.”
“I don’t think he told me the entirety of those problems. I’ve done some research on panic attacks and phobias, and his reactions don’t match up. Then I found this.” He clicked a link. “Flashbacks.”
“You think he has flashbacks?”
Yugi turned toward him. “It’s the only possibility. That’s why he was muttering when he heard the car crash, and that’s why he didn’t hear me at first when he collapsed at the mall. I don’t think he’s aware of what’s happening around him.”
Jounouchi tried to think of a polite way to say his next sentences. “Yug…I still don’t really see why this is a big deal. I guess it ought to be expected that he might’ve had this disorder and if he does, then flashbacks are part of it. He was trapped under a building for hours, that’s going to mess a person up. Why is it a surprise to you?”
“It’s not a surprise, it just raises some questions. He had one last night. We were…” Yugi trailed off, recalling the moment.
“You were what?” Jounouchi asked. Suddenly, his expression turned to one of fascinated shock. “You were…?! Seriously?!”
“No, not that!” Yugi snapped, lowering his voice quickly as his face flared red. “We were cuddling!”
“Okay, well, you were being so cryptic, what else was I supposed to assume?” Jounouchi defended.
“We were just cuddling,” Yugi said, with emphasis on the ‘just.’ His face was still red. “And…I told him I loved him.”
Jounouchi looked uncomfortable. “Yugi, this sounds more like something you should discuss with Anzu. She’s better with this stuff.”
“He freaked out,” Yugi said, as if not hearing Jounouchi’s misgivings.
“He freaked out because you told him you loved him?”
“No. He seemed happy to hear that. He freaked out when he tried to tell me he loved me back. He couldn’t say the words. He was almost sick over it. And for a second, he went into that state where it was like he was watching something only he could see.” Yugi pointed at the screen. “I think it was another flashback.”
“Why would saying ‘I love you’ cause a flashback? Unless the earthquake happened when he was in the middle of confessing his feelings to someone. Talk about bad timing.”
Yugi shrugged. “I don’t know. He’s never mentioned any other relationship. I guess I never asked though.” He gazed thoughtfully at the screen.
“Yugi,” Jounouchi said nervously. “I recognize that look.”
“What look?”
“The look like you’re trying to figure out how to help him. You used to give me and Honda that look all the time.”
“So what? I do want to help him. It hurts to see him so scared and upset,” Yugi said.
“Has he asked for your help?”
“No, but I’m sure he doesn’t like having phobias and flashbacks, so he’d probably appreciate-”
“Yugi, can I just interrupt here?” Jounouchi asked, grimacing slightly. Yugi fell silent. “Look…how long did it take before Honda and I figured out that you wanted to help us and we accepted your friendship?”
“Grade school, up until a year ago.”
“Exactly. Now, all along we might have known that you only had our best interests at heart. We might have even known deep down that accepting your friendship would make life much better. But we weren’t interested and it took a lot of years before we accepted it.”
“What does this have to do with Yami?”
Jounouchi rested his hand on Yugi’s shoulder. “Just…don’t try to force help on him until he asks for it. You might not like his reaction, and I don’t want to see you hurt.”
Slowly, Yugi looked up and nodded. “I know.”
- - -
As the week wore on, Yugi began to notice a change in Yami. The closer it got to Friday, the more depressed he seemed. At first it could have been chalked down to tiredness or nervousness or stress, (all of which Yugi tried to tell himself), but when his mood only seemed to get worse, Yugi began to worry.
“Well, tomorrow’s the big day, isn’t it?” he finally asked Yami on Thursday afternoon.
“Huh?”
“The day your mother gets out? Isn’t it tomorrow?”
“Oh…yeah…it is.” Yami seemed even more upset.
“Yami, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“Come on, I know you better than that.”
“Nothing…just…” He bowed his head and mumbled something.
“What?”
“I…I don’t have enough.”
“Enough what?”
“Enough money. For an apartment. I’ve been calculating it again and again all this week. All the leases on any decent apartments require the first and last month’s payment and a security deposit, and I have to be able to pay for groceries and things to get her set up. I don’t have enough for all of that.”
“You’ve only been working here for a little while. It’s okay if you don’t have enough yet, you’ll have enough soon and she can get a job too, can’t she?”
“Yeah, but what’s she supposed to do in the meantime?” Yami asked.
“She can stay here.”
“No, she can’t. Yugi, your family let me stay and I’m grateful, but they’re not going to take another person in.”
“Well we could at least ask them.”
“No.”
“Then where is she going to go?” Yugi asked reasonably.
“I don’t know. The homeless shelter maybe, we’ve stayed there before. But if she does, I’ll go back with her,” Yami finally replied.
“Yami, you can’t, that isn’t your world anymore-”
“I’m not making her live out there alone.” Yami’s tone was gruff. “So unless by tomorrow I have the money for the lease on an apartment, I’m not staying here. I’ll work here, but I won’t stay.”
“I’ll ask Grandpa to loan you the money. I’ll loan you the money. I’d give you the money for free, it wouldn’t matter-”
“No, no loans, not even for this.”
“He wouldn’t mind, you know. None of us would mind giving you the money.”
“I know. But I’m not taking a loan and certainly not gift money from you guys…after everything you’ve done for me I won’t ask for anything else, you’ve already done too much.”
“Yami…” Yugi began, thinking that in this situation Yami should be able to ignore his pride, but Yami shook his head.
“Yugi, please…don’t. Don’t press this right now, okay?” He looked at Yugi sadly. Yugi looked back, and nodded, touching Yami’s hand for a moment.
“Okay, I won’t.” He gave his palm a caress, and then went back upstairs to do his homework, although he couldn’t concentrate at all.
- - -
That evening, Yami took a shower and announced he was going to bed early. Yugi went to give him a good-night hug and kiss.
“Try not to worry too much.”
Yami shrugged. “Worrying won’t fix anything.” He pulled the blankets up over himself and squeezed Yugi’s hand once. “Good night.”
“Good night.” Yugi got up and stood beside the doorway for a long time, until he thought he was sleeping peacefully. Jounouchi’s words of warning came back to him.
I know he didn’t ask for help, but if he doesn’t know that I helped then he can’t be mad, he reasoned. With this to quiet his conscience, he returned upstairs and called his mother and grandfather into the living room.
“Mom, Grandpa…I have a favor to ask.”
“What is it?”
“Well…um…could Yami’s mother maybe…stay with us?”
“What?” they both asked, looking confused.
“It’s Yami’s mother, she needs a place to stay, and Yami refuses to ask you, so-”
“I thought Yami moved away from his parents because they had no money and that’s why he’s staying here,” Yugi’s mother said, looking suspicious. “Why does his mother suddenly need help?”
Yugi shifted uncomfortably. To help his friends understand Yami better, he’d told them the whole story, but he hadn’t exactly told his family the truth when he convinced them to let Yami stay with them. He’d told them that Yami had to drop out of school because they had no money, and sort of skirted the issue of where his parents were. It had seemed like the best thing to do at the time.
“Well…actually…most of Yami’s family is dead. They were killed in the earthquake a few years ago down south. His mother is his only close relative left.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Yugi’s grandfather said. “But why does she need a place to stay? Doesn’t she have her own home?”
“Um…no. She doesn’t.”
“Why not? Was she evicted?”
“Yeah…yeah, she was.” Yugi seized on this excuse. “And she and Yami don’t have enough money combined for a new place yet, so if she could just stay here a couple days…”
“I don’t believe this.” A new voice joined the conversation.
Yugi turned around and saw Yami standing in the doorway, staring at Yugi with a mixture of hurt and disbelief in his eyes.
“Yami, I…”
“You’re ashamed,” he said incredulously. “You’re ashamed…to tell them. Yugi…I…I can’t believe this.”
“No, Yami, it’s not that-”
“If it wasn’t that then why don’t you tell your family the truth? If you’re going to go behind my back and ask for things I told you not to ask for, why don’t you give them the real story at least? I thought they knew the truth about where my mother was! I thought they welcomed me here in spite of that, but they actually didn’t know anything about us at all, did they?” Yami’s voice was rising.
“Yami, yes, it’s true, I didn’t tell them everything, but not because I was ashamed!” Yugi said, pleading, begging Yami with his eyes not to be angry.
“So, there is more to this?” Yugi’s mother folded her arms. “Yami, maybe you could tell us what’s really going on? Yugi seems to be withholding details. Your mother was evicted?”
“My mother is in jail,” Yami said quietly, his eyes narrowing at the recoil in their expressions, “and has been for the last few months. And we haven’t had a real home in a long time. We’ve been homeless for the last year.”
“Yugi, that isn’t what you told us,” Sugoroku, beginning to look upset as well, turned toward his grandson.
“I’m sorry, I just…really wanted this chance for Yami, and I thought you’d like him more and be more willing to take him in if you didn’t know his past-” Yugi stopped, realizing what he had done as he saw the hurt and confused look on Yami’s face turn to one of bitterness.
“So that’s how it is. You were ashamed of who I am.” Yami’s voice shook.
“No, that came out wrong-”
“You lied to me when you said it didn’t matter that my mother was in jail and you lied when you said you respected me in spite of things other people might think! What else did you lie about? Did you lie when you said you loved me, too?”
Yugi’s family had nothing to say to that accusation. Yugi was in tears.
“Yami, I’m sorry…I’m so sorry, but none of those were lies! I really did mean everything, I’m not ashamed of you, I’m not!”
“You thought they would like me more if I wasn’t really me!” He glared. “So I’ve been two different people all along? Which of those people did you kiss? The real me or the one who you’ve invented that conveniently gets rid of everything shameful about me?”
“Kiss?” Yugi’s mother finally asked.
“Yami, it’s not like that at all!”
“Wait, you kissed him?” Mrs. Mutou was trying her hardest to find a hold in the three-way conversation, directing the question toward Yami.
Yugi ignored her, still looking at Yami desperately. “I love you, Yami, everything about you. There is nothing shameful about you or your family.”
“You’re a couple? When did this happen? What happened to Anzu, I thought you liked her,” his mother said.
“I do like her, she’s my friend. Just my friend.”
“But you were so cute together, and I always thought you liked girls-”
“Mom, this really isn’t the time right now!” Yugi finally said, though not taking his eyes off of Yami.
“Why is your mother in jail?” Yugi’s grandfather asked Yami during a lull as Yugi’s mother’s expression grew more severe.
Yami, his jaw clenched, said, “She was arrested for theft. She was a housekeeper, and was caught stealing things from some houses to sell. And also for prostitution.”
Yugi could see the shock and disgust in his family’s eyes, and tried to intervene, hoping to inspire sympathy. “They’ve had a really hard time, and I love Yami, and I really want to help them-”
“Yugi, you’re sixteen, and you don’t know anything about love, much less what you learned from some drifter off the street.”
“Mom, this isn’t even the point right now. I knew the first day that I cared about him.”
“How could you ever know something like that?” she asked.
“Because, I could just look at him and tell! And I know he feels the same way back! Now please, I just want to help-”
“He lives on the streets and his mother was a thief and a prostitute, how can you expect him to know anything about love or responsibility?” she fired back.
“Leave her out of this!” Yami snarled, cutting in. “She did what she did in an attempt to give me a better life, would a bad person do something like that? You’re a mother yourself, if it came down to doing something illegal or taking care of your son, which would you pick?”
Yugi’s mother fell silent. Yami was panting from the force of shouting. Yugi was struggling to control tears. Yugi’s grandfather, however, still seemed to be assessing the situation. Then he said, “Yami, I’m sorry about this misunderstanding. My opinion is only half the choice, but if your mother needs a place to stay for a few days-”
“No. I told Yugi, no.” Yami’s voice was still low and cold. “He already offered to me and I told him not to ask you. I’m not going to put my mother in debt to you as well.”
Yugi’s mother, having spent the lull glancing between Yami and her son, deep in thought, shook her head. “Yami, you can’t stay here anymore.”
“Mom, no,” Yugi begged, but she ignored him.
“I just don’t think it’s a good idea. Perhaps…I know you don’t have enough, so if we gave you the money-”
Yugi froze, and tried to shake his head at her from behind Yami, trying to warn her not to go on. She didn’t pick up on the signals. “How much do you need? If it’s a manageable amount, we could make up the difference.”
Yami’s eyes flared. “I told you, I don’t want pity handouts.”
“Yami, she didn’t mean it that way, she doesn’t understand-” Yugi hurried to explain.
“Yugi, shut up, you clearly don’t understand either!” Yami snapped. Yugi shrank back, shocked and crushed. “I thought I was given this job because of who I was, because you saw me as hard-working and deserving of it despite my…our…pasts. I thought…” He stopped, turning away from Yugi suddenly and hissing at the floor. “My mistake. I won’t make it again.” Turning, he strode toward the stairs leading to the private entrance.
“Yami, wait!” Yugi took off after him, grabbing his arm at the top of the stairs leading down to the front door.
“Yugi, let me go.” Yami was refusing to look at him.
“No, I’m not. Yami, I’m sorry, I’m sorry about everything, but please don’t leave-”
“I’m not staying in a place I’m only welcome in because the people there don’t know who I really am!”
“Yami, I’m sorry I told them what I did, but I did it for you, because I love you and I just wanted…I just wanted to help somehow. I wanted to do something and I wasn’t thinking.” He waited, hoping Yami would relent. “Yami?”
Yami still refused to meet his eyes and looked away at the wall. “This was a mistake. I knew it was all wrong. I shouldn’t have given in.”
“No. Don’t do this, don’t say that-”
“Yugi, let go of me.” Yami’s voice was so quiet it was almost a whisper, and that was the only reason Yugi let go. Yami wasn’t shouting anymore. This quiet, wounded version of him was a hundred times worse than ever seeing his anger and Yugi knew he had to let go.
“At least…at least let me go get you your things,” Yugi choked.
Yami jerked his head in what Yugi interpreted to be a nod, and Yugi turned and ran to the shop, scrambling for Yami’s belongings. Half-blinded by tears, he tripped and fell, spilling the contents of the cart.
“Oh no…” He began stuffing clothing back in, and felt something made of paper under his foot. Wiping his eyes, he picked it up to see it was the envelope of pictures. It had fallen open. Crouching, he picked up the loose photos. His eyes fell on one that looked unfamiliar.
He ran his sleeve over his face again and blinked to clear his vision before picking up the picture and peering more closely at it. Yami, looking around age twelve or so, smiled out of it with his arm around another smiling boy with short, dark hair and light brown eyes. Yugi flipped the picture over, but found no clue to the other boy’s identity.
Why wasn’t this in with the other pictures he showed me?
There was no time to wonder about it. He slid the pictures back inside, latched the crate, and dragged it back upstairs and down the hall to the front door. “Here.”
Yami merely took it and turned away.
Yugi couldn’t stop himself from speaking. “Y-Yami…?”
Finally, Yami looked back. Yugi saw tears running down his cheeks, and he wanted to reach out and hold him again the way he had before when Yami had cried and looked at him with hurt like that in his face. But before he could, Yami had walked down the stairs and out the door.
Yugi thought about going after him, and then didn’t. He knew when he had crossed the line. So he returned to the living room where his mother was undoubtedly waiting to lecture him for lying. Another fight…but a fight that couldn’t possibly hurt as much as this one did.
X - X - X
Notes: The chapters are getting longer... xD This one was ten pages. Guhh...poor guys.
Good luck to everyone who still has exams left to go, and congrats to everybody who's out of school for the holiday!
Chapter: 07
Author: Chey (duelist_gurl163)
Rating: R
Genre: Angst/romance
Pairing: YamixYugi
Archive: Here
Overall warnings: AU, implied sex, insanity, violence
Spoilers: None.
Summary: Before he met Yugi, Yami spent his days panhandling alone. Yugi put his heart into changing Yami’s life, giving him companionship, a home and his love. But even he can’t save Yami from the control of his past, nor the dark path he is set upon.
Disclaimer: Yugioh continues to not belong to me.
- 01 - 02 - 03 - 04 - 05 - 06 -
---
The next morning, Yugi awoke feeling odd. It took him a minute to remember the night before. His confession. Their kiss.
His cheeks went red. Happiness and uncertainty battled inside him as he tested out the thought, I have a boyfriend.
Didn’t he? Technically he and Yami hadn’t come right out and agreed they were dating…Yami hadn’t said much of anything after the kiss, really, other than a quiet, “good night” when Yugi had left. But…they had both agreed to having feelings for each other. That was close enough, wasn’t it?
Unless, sometime overnight, Yami had changed his mind.
Fear replacing his happy feelings, Yugi jumped up and hurried downstairs, not even bothering to change clothes. He found Yami sitting stiffly at the table, Yugi’s mother hovering nearby.
“Good morning Yugi,” she said, causing Yami’s head to shoot up. He and Yugi met eyes, then he looked back down at his glass of orange juice.
“Hi Mom. Um, Yami, can I talk to you?”
Yami nodded and got up, following him back up the stairs. As soon as they reached the landing, they both spoke at once:
“Yugi, about what-”
“Yami, are we-”
They both stopped, and Yugi assumed by Yami’s silence that he was supposed to go first. So he tried again, “Are we…technically dating now? After what happened? I mean, if…if you still feel the same, then dating seems…like the natural thing now, right?”
Yami looked uncomfortable. “I- I guess.”
“You guess what?” Yugi asked nervously. “That we should date? Or that you…feel the same? Because if you don’t-”
Yugi was even offering him an easy way out. All he had to do was say, I’m sorry, last night I was just confused, I think we should only be friends.
Instead, the fool he was, he shook his head. “No. I meant…about dating. But it’s fine. If you think we should…then we can.”
“I just need to know what to tell my friends,” Yugi said, hope returning. “If this is going to be a relationship, then…I think they need to know. But I don’t want to spread any information around that you aren’t comfortable with.”
“It’s fine,” Yami said, swallowing. “It’s fine, you can tell them.”
Yugi smiled shyly at him, and reached out cautiously to take his hand. Then he leaned in and placed a fast kiss on Yami’s lips, causing both their faces to flush, but earning him a quiet smile back.
“I have to go get ready for school,” Yugi said, his heart pounding again as he turned and hurried back to his room.
Left where he was, Yami groaned slightly. Scratch that, he wasn’t a fool. He was a hopeless, happily drowning fool.
- - -
“Yami and I are dating.”
His announcement, probably the biggest announcement of his life so far, was met with blank stares.
“You and Yami are what?!” Honda demanded.
“Dating.”
“As in…you’re a couple?”
Yugi nodded.
“When did this happen?” Anzu asked, eyes wide.
“Last night. I…I’ve been thinking for awhile about how I feel and last night I decided to talk to him,” Yugi said, figuring he’d might as well get the whole story out. “And we talked, and…” He wasn’t sure they were ready to hear about kissing yet. “He feels the same.”
“Isn’t this going kind of fast? You only met him two months ago.”
“But I’ve spent days just talking to him about everything. And we’ve lived together for awhile now and I know his whole history,” Yugi replied to her. “It doesn’t feel like he’s such a stranger.”
“So you’re gay?”
Leave it to Jounouchi to cut straight to the chase. Of course, he was the one who had always loaned Yugi heterosexual smut videos in the past. No wonder he was confused. Yugi shrugged. “I don’t know. I think bi would be the right term. I’m still figuring this out too. I just know…I like Yami as more than a friend. This is what I want, I’m happy.”
As he had expected, he was beginning to see acceptance in their faces. But there would be no celebrating, no slaps on the back, no “hey, that’s great!” He hadn’t expected any, but it still dampened his happiness. He would have at least liked their support.
“Really, this is a good thing,” he said. “I know you had a rocky start with him, but…you’ve seen him in the store since then and you know why he freaked out, so it’s all okay now, right? He cares about me, that’s got to mean something, doesn’t it? And I’ll still have plenty of time to hang out with you guys, things will barely change at all, you’ll see.”
“It isn’t like we can really tell you what to do,” Anzu said. “It’s your life, your choice of…partner.”
“I know, but your support still means a lot,” Yugi said hopefully.
She took a deep breath. “Then I support you. I mean, if you two are happy…then why not?”
He looked over at Jounouchi and Honda, who both nodded in agreement with her.
“Never thought you’d be the first one among us to have a real relationship,” Honda finally said, making them all laugh.
It wasn’t exactly an enthusiastic endorsement, but Yugi was willing to take it.
- - -
A week later found Yami and Yugi sitting on Yami’s bed Monday evening, arms around each others’ shoulders as they cuddled. As long as they kept their voices low, they would be able to hear anybody coming down the stairs in time to assume a more innocent scene. Yugi still wasn’t sure how he would tell his parents.
He snuggled up closer. “Hey, Yami?”
“Hm?”
“I’ve been wondering, what does your mother look like? And your father?”
“Well…” He paused. “I’m not very good at descriptions, what if I showed you a picture?”
“You have pictures?” Yugi asked, sitting up as Yami knelt to rummage through his belongings.
“Only a few. We were allowed to go back into the house for belongings after the aftershocks subsided, but part of it had completely fallen in…we were only able to save a few.” He straightened up, holding an envelope, and shook out the photographs. With his back to Yugi, he shuffled through them and slid one back into the envelope before turning and handing the rest over. “Here…it was taken a long time ago, but you get the idea.”
Yugi took the pictures and smiled at the top one. He took a moment to study the tall woman and rather shorter man, noting similarities between their traits and Yami’s, but his eyes were drawn to the small boy standing between the two adults. Yami’s younger self beamed through missing teeth at the camera. “How old were you?”
“Seven, I think.” His cheeks reddened. “Focus on my parents, alright?”
Yugi shuffled through the stack, grinning particularly broadly at one of a smiling woman holding a baby with unusually coloured hair, and then handed them back. He saw Yami glance at the pictures as he put them away, and noticed the look in his eyes. Once Yami had settled back beside him, Yugi leaned his head on his shoulder and whispered, “You miss your mom, don’t you?”
Yami sighed. “I suppose it isn’t very cool for an eighteen-year-old to say he misses his mother. But after everything, with her being the only family I have…yes, I do.”
“Well, she’ll get out soon and then you can live together again,” Yugi said cheerfully.
Yami didn’t reply, just glanced down at the floor. His voice seemed sad. “Yeah.”
Gently, Yugi stroked a lock of Yami’s hair. “It’ll be alright.”
He smiled and hugged Yugi closer. “I’m glad you believe in that.”
Yugi snuggled against his chest, gazing up into his eyes. “I know it might be too early for me to say this, but I…I want to. I love you,” he whispered.
For a moment Yami closed his eyes, letting the words sink in along with all the feelings they brought. He wanted to remember this feeling forever, wanted to burn it into his memories so that nothing could erase it. “I love you, too,” he started to whisper back.
He only made it as far as “I lo-” At that moment he opened his eyes and looked down to see a corpse staring back at him. Half its face was pasty and streaked with blood, the other half crushed and unrecognizable as human.
He felt his heart begin to pound in his ears.
I love you.
And suddenly he was back at that day, cradling a broken, cold body, sobbing too hard to breathe.
I love you.
The corpse stared back, its single light-brown eye fixated, unseeing, forever.
With a sudden cry, he released the figure and threw himself off the mat, sliding across the floor on his knees, his right hand pressed over his mouth as the room spun and a wave of nausea overtook him.
“Yami!”
He fought back the bitterness in his throat, and slowly the room came back into focus.
“Yami? Are you okay, are you sick? Should I get help?” Yugi was kneeling beside him, one hand on his shoulder.
Slowly he lowered his hand. “Some water…would be good,” he said hoarsely.
Grateful for something helpful to do, Yugi jumped to his feet. “Water, okay. I’ll be right back. Don’t move.”
As Yugi’s footsteps faded up the stairs, Yami curled where he was. What was that? He had been feeling just fine - happy, even. Happy emotions had never caused this before!
Is it because of trying to say…?
Softly, under his breath, he said, “I love y-”
That was as far as he got before he felt cold, creeping sickness in his chest, forcing him to stop.
“Here, I got water,” Yugi said, skidding back into the room and crouching down to hand him the glass. Yami took it, taking a few gulps to clear his throat.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled.
Yugi folded his legs, staying close by, peering at him with concern. “Do you want to tell me what happened?”
“I don’t know what happened.” He set the glass down. “But I can’t…I can’t say those words.”
“What words?” Yugi said, confused. “You mean ‘I love you?’”
Slowly, Yami nodded.
Yugi was silent for a long moment, not knowing what to make of that. He felt worried, confused…slightly disappointed even, because he would have loved to hear those words from Yami. But one look at Yami’s pale face told him this was no act.
“It’s okay,” he finally said. “You don’t have to. I mean…I know that you love me. I guess there’s no reason why you should have to say it if it…causes something like this.”
Yami tried to smile at him, and his voice was calmer as he said, “Thank you for the water,” but there was no way to erase his expression. And it was his expression that worried Yugi most of all.
- - -
“Hey Yugi, what’cha doing?” Jounouchi asked, clapping him on the shoulder. Yugi jumped.
“Jounouchi! Don’t sneak up on me like that.”
“Sorry. What’s on the computer that’s so fascinating?” he said, peering over Yugi’s shoulder at the screen. “Post-traumatic stress disorder…no way, don’t tell me you’re actually doing that science essay a week before it’s due. Your mom’s nagging about procrastination must have finally gotten to you.”
Yugi shook his head. “It’s not for the project, just research for myself.”
Jounouchi pulled up a chair. “Research for what?”
“For Yami. Do you know anything about post-traumatic stress?”
“Sure, they talked about it in that war documentary Hiroki-sensei showed. Soldiers get it.”
“Not just soldiers.” Yugi scrolled down the page. “There are tons of other reasons people have it. Including disasters.”
“Oh…I think I know what this is about now.” Jounouchi leaned against the table. “But what’s the big deal? Yami already told you he had problems from the earthquake, that’s not news.”
“I don’t think he told me the entirety of those problems. I’ve done some research on panic attacks and phobias, and his reactions don’t match up. Then I found this.” He clicked a link. “Flashbacks.”
“You think he has flashbacks?”
Yugi turned toward him. “It’s the only possibility. That’s why he was muttering when he heard the car crash, and that’s why he didn’t hear me at first when he collapsed at the mall. I don’t think he’s aware of what’s happening around him.”
Jounouchi tried to think of a polite way to say his next sentences. “Yug…I still don’t really see why this is a big deal. I guess it ought to be expected that he might’ve had this disorder and if he does, then flashbacks are part of it. He was trapped under a building for hours, that’s going to mess a person up. Why is it a surprise to you?”
“It’s not a surprise, it just raises some questions. He had one last night. We were…” Yugi trailed off, recalling the moment.
“You were what?” Jounouchi asked. Suddenly, his expression turned to one of fascinated shock. “You were…?! Seriously?!”
“No, not that!” Yugi snapped, lowering his voice quickly as his face flared red. “We were cuddling!”
“Okay, well, you were being so cryptic, what else was I supposed to assume?” Jounouchi defended.
“We were just cuddling,” Yugi said, with emphasis on the ‘just.’ His face was still red. “And…I told him I loved him.”
Jounouchi looked uncomfortable. “Yugi, this sounds more like something you should discuss with Anzu. She’s better with this stuff.”
“He freaked out,” Yugi said, as if not hearing Jounouchi’s misgivings.
“He freaked out because you told him you loved him?”
“No. He seemed happy to hear that. He freaked out when he tried to tell me he loved me back. He couldn’t say the words. He was almost sick over it. And for a second, he went into that state where it was like he was watching something only he could see.” Yugi pointed at the screen. “I think it was another flashback.”
“Why would saying ‘I love you’ cause a flashback? Unless the earthquake happened when he was in the middle of confessing his feelings to someone. Talk about bad timing.”
Yugi shrugged. “I don’t know. He’s never mentioned any other relationship. I guess I never asked though.” He gazed thoughtfully at the screen.
“Yugi,” Jounouchi said nervously. “I recognize that look.”
“What look?”
“The look like you’re trying to figure out how to help him. You used to give me and Honda that look all the time.”
“So what? I do want to help him. It hurts to see him so scared and upset,” Yugi said.
“Has he asked for your help?”
“No, but I’m sure he doesn’t like having phobias and flashbacks, so he’d probably appreciate-”
“Yugi, can I just interrupt here?” Jounouchi asked, grimacing slightly. Yugi fell silent. “Look…how long did it take before Honda and I figured out that you wanted to help us and we accepted your friendship?”
“Grade school, up until a year ago.”
“Exactly. Now, all along we might have known that you only had our best interests at heart. We might have even known deep down that accepting your friendship would make life much better. But we weren’t interested and it took a lot of years before we accepted it.”
“What does this have to do with Yami?”
Jounouchi rested his hand on Yugi’s shoulder. “Just…don’t try to force help on him until he asks for it. You might not like his reaction, and I don’t want to see you hurt.”
Slowly, Yugi looked up and nodded. “I know.”
- - -
As the week wore on, Yugi began to notice a change in Yami. The closer it got to Friday, the more depressed he seemed. At first it could have been chalked down to tiredness or nervousness or stress, (all of which Yugi tried to tell himself), but when his mood only seemed to get worse, Yugi began to worry.
“Well, tomorrow’s the big day, isn’t it?” he finally asked Yami on Thursday afternoon.
“Huh?”
“The day your mother gets out? Isn’t it tomorrow?”
“Oh…yeah…it is.” Yami seemed even more upset.
“Yami, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
“Come on, I know you better than that.”
“Nothing…just…” He bowed his head and mumbled something.
“What?”
“I…I don’t have enough.”
“Enough what?”
“Enough money. For an apartment. I’ve been calculating it again and again all this week. All the leases on any decent apartments require the first and last month’s payment and a security deposit, and I have to be able to pay for groceries and things to get her set up. I don’t have enough for all of that.”
“You’ve only been working here for a little while. It’s okay if you don’t have enough yet, you’ll have enough soon and she can get a job too, can’t she?”
“Yeah, but what’s she supposed to do in the meantime?” Yami asked.
“She can stay here.”
“No, she can’t. Yugi, your family let me stay and I’m grateful, but they’re not going to take another person in.”
“Well we could at least ask them.”
“No.”
“Then where is she going to go?” Yugi asked reasonably.
“I don’t know. The homeless shelter maybe, we’ve stayed there before. But if she does, I’ll go back with her,” Yami finally replied.
“Yami, you can’t, that isn’t your world anymore-”
“I’m not making her live out there alone.” Yami’s tone was gruff. “So unless by tomorrow I have the money for the lease on an apartment, I’m not staying here. I’ll work here, but I won’t stay.”
“I’ll ask Grandpa to loan you the money. I’ll loan you the money. I’d give you the money for free, it wouldn’t matter-”
“No, no loans, not even for this.”
“He wouldn’t mind, you know. None of us would mind giving you the money.”
“I know. But I’m not taking a loan and certainly not gift money from you guys…after everything you’ve done for me I won’t ask for anything else, you’ve already done too much.”
“Yami…” Yugi began, thinking that in this situation Yami should be able to ignore his pride, but Yami shook his head.
“Yugi, please…don’t. Don’t press this right now, okay?” He looked at Yugi sadly. Yugi looked back, and nodded, touching Yami’s hand for a moment.
“Okay, I won’t.” He gave his palm a caress, and then went back upstairs to do his homework, although he couldn’t concentrate at all.
- - -
That evening, Yami took a shower and announced he was going to bed early. Yugi went to give him a good-night hug and kiss.
“Try not to worry too much.”
Yami shrugged. “Worrying won’t fix anything.” He pulled the blankets up over himself and squeezed Yugi’s hand once. “Good night.”
“Good night.” Yugi got up and stood beside the doorway for a long time, until he thought he was sleeping peacefully. Jounouchi’s words of warning came back to him.
I know he didn’t ask for help, but if he doesn’t know that I helped then he can’t be mad, he reasoned. With this to quiet his conscience, he returned upstairs and called his mother and grandfather into the living room.
“Mom, Grandpa…I have a favor to ask.”
“What is it?”
“Well…um…could Yami’s mother maybe…stay with us?”
“What?” they both asked, looking confused.
“It’s Yami’s mother, she needs a place to stay, and Yami refuses to ask you, so-”
“I thought Yami moved away from his parents because they had no money and that’s why he’s staying here,” Yugi’s mother said, looking suspicious. “Why does his mother suddenly need help?”
Yugi shifted uncomfortably. To help his friends understand Yami better, he’d told them the whole story, but he hadn’t exactly told his family the truth when he convinced them to let Yami stay with them. He’d told them that Yami had to drop out of school because they had no money, and sort of skirted the issue of where his parents were. It had seemed like the best thing to do at the time.
“Well…actually…most of Yami’s family is dead. They were killed in the earthquake a few years ago down south. His mother is his only close relative left.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Yugi’s grandfather said. “But why does she need a place to stay? Doesn’t she have her own home?”
“Um…no. She doesn’t.”
“Why not? Was she evicted?”
“Yeah…yeah, she was.” Yugi seized on this excuse. “And she and Yami don’t have enough money combined for a new place yet, so if she could just stay here a couple days…”
“I don’t believe this.” A new voice joined the conversation.
Yugi turned around and saw Yami standing in the doorway, staring at Yugi with a mixture of hurt and disbelief in his eyes.
“Yami, I…”
“You’re ashamed,” he said incredulously. “You’re ashamed…to tell them. Yugi…I…I can’t believe this.”
“No, Yami, it’s not that-”
“If it wasn’t that then why don’t you tell your family the truth? If you’re going to go behind my back and ask for things I told you not to ask for, why don’t you give them the real story at least? I thought they knew the truth about where my mother was! I thought they welcomed me here in spite of that, but they actually didn’t know anything about us at all, did they?” Yami’s voice was rising.
“Yami, yes, it’s true, I didn’t tell them everything, but not because I was ashamed!” Yugi said, pleading, begging Yami with his eyes not to be angry.
“So, there is more to this?” Yugi’s mother folded her arms. “Yami, maybe you could tell us what’s really going on? Yugi seems to be withholding details. Your mother was evicted?”
“My mother is in jail,” Yami said quietly, his eyes narrowing at the recoil in their expressions, “and has been for the last few months. And we haven’t had a real home in a long time. We’ve been homeless for the last year.”
“Yugi, that isn’t what you told us,” Sugoroku, beginning to look upset as well, turned toward his grandson.
“I’m sorry, I just…really wanted this chance for Yami, and I thought you’d like him more and be more willing to take him in if you didn’t know his past-” Yugi stopped, realizing what he had done as he saw the hurt and confused look on Yami’s face turn to one of bitterness.
“So that’s how it is. You were ashamed of who I am.” Yami’s voice shook.
“No, that came out wrong-”
“You lied to me when you said it didn’t matter that my mother was in jail and you lied when you said you respected me in spite of things other people might think! What else did you lie about? Did you lie when you said you loved me, too?”
Yugi’s family had nothing to say to that accusation. Yugi was in tears.
“Yami, I’m sorry…I’m so sorry, but none of those were lies! I really did mean everything, I’m not ashamed of you, I’m not!”
“You thought they would like me more if I wasn’t really me!” He glared. “So I’ve been two different people all along? Which of those people did you kiss? The real me or the one who you’ve invented that conveniently gets rid of everything shameful about me?”
“Kiss?” Yugi’s mother finally asked.
“Yami, it’s not like that at all!”
“Wait, you kissed him?” Mrs. Mutou was trying her hardest to find a hold in the three-way conversation, directing the question toward Yami.
Yugi ignored her, still looking at Yami desperately. “I love you, Yami, everything about you. There is nothing shameful about you or your family.”
“You’re a couple? When did this happen? What happened to Anzu, I thought you liked her,” his mother said.
“I do like her, she’s my friend. Just my friend.”
“But you were so cute together, and I always thought you liked girls-”
“Mom, this really isn’t the time right now!” Yugi finally said, though not taking his eyes off of Yami.
“Why is your mother in jail?” Yugi’s grandfather asked Yami during a lull as Yugi’s mother’s expression grew more severe.
Yami, his jaw clenched, said, “She was arrested for theft. She was a housekeeper, and was caught stealing things from some houses to sell. And also for prostitution.”
Yugi could see the shock and disgust in his family’s eyes, and tried to intervene, hoping to inspire sympathy. “They’ve had a really hard time, and I love Yami, and I really want to help them-”
“Yugi, you’re sixteen, and you don’t know anything about love, much less what you learned from some drifter off the street.”
“Mom, this isn’t even the point right now. I knew the first day that I cared about him.”
“How could you ever know something like that?” she asked.
“Because, I could just look at him and tell! And I know he feels the same way back! Now please, I just want to help-”
“He lives on the streets and his mother was a thief and a prostitute, how can you expect him to know anything about love or responsibility?” she fired back.
“Leave her out of this!” Yami snarled, cutting in. “She did what she did in an attempt to give me a better life, would a bad person do something like that? You’re a mother yourself, if it came down to doing something illegal or taking care of your son, which would you pick?”
Yugi’s mother fell silent. Yami was panting from the force of shouting. Yugi was struggling to control tears. Yugi’s grandfather, however, still seemed to be assessing the situation. Then he said, “Yami, I’m sorry about this misunderstanding. My opinion is only half the choice, but if your mother needs a place to stay for a few days-”
“No. I told Yugi, no.” Yami’s voice was still low and cold. “He already offered to me and I told him not to ask you. I’m not going to put my mother in debt to you as well.”
Yugi’s mother, having spent the lull glancing between Yami and her son, deep in thought, shook her head. “Yami, you can’t stay here anymore.”
“Mom, no,” Yugi begged, but she ignored him.
“I just don’t think it’s a good idea. Perhaps…I know you don’t have enough, so if we gave you the money-”
Yugi froze, and tried to shake his head at her from behind Yami, trying to warn her not to go on. She didn’t pick up on the signals. “How much do you need? If it’s a manageable amount, we could make up the difference.”
Yami’s eyes flared. “I told you, I don’t want pity handouts.”
“Yami, she didn’t mean it that way, she doesn’t understand-” Yugi hurried to explain.
“Yugi, shut up, you clearly don’t understand either!” Yami snapped. Yugi shrank back, shocked and crushed. “I thought I was given this job because of who I was, because you saw me as hard-working and deserving of it despite my…our…pasts. I thought…” He stopped, turning away from Yugi suddenly and hissing at the floor. “My mistake. I won’t make it again.” Turning, he strode toward the stairs leading to the private entrance.
“Yami, wait!” Yugi took off after him, grabbing his arm at the top of the stairs leading down to the front door.
“Yugi, let me go.” Yami was refusing to look at him.
“No, I’m not. Yami, I’m sorry, I’m sorry about everything, but please don’t leave-”
“I’m not staying in a place I’m only welcome in because the people there don’t know who I really am!”
“Yami, I’m sorry I told them what I did, but I did it for you, because I love you and I just wanted…I just wanted to help somehow. I wanted to do something and I wasn’t thinking.” He waited, hoping Yami would relent. “Yami?”
Yami still refused to meet his eyes and looked away at the wall. “This was a mistake. I knew it was all wrong. I shouldn’t have given in.”
“No. Don’t do this, don’t say that-”
“Yugi, let go of me.” Yami’s voice was so quiet it was almost a whisper, and that was the only reason Yugi let go. Yami wasn’t shouting anymore. This quiet, wounded version of him was a hundred times worse than ever seeing his anger and Yugi knew he had to let go.
“At least…at least let me go get you your things,” Yugi choked.
Yami jerked his head in what Yugi interpreted to be a nod, and Yugi turned and ran to the shop, scrambling for Yami’s belongings. Half-blinded by tears, he tripped and fell, spilling the contents of the cart.
“Oh no…” He began stuffing clothing back in, and felt something made of paper under his foot. Wiping his eyes, he picked it up to see it was the envelope of pictures. It had fallen open. Crouching, he picked up the loose photos. His eyes fell on one that looked unfamiliar.
He ran his sleeve over his face again and blinked to clear his vision before picking up the picture and peering more closely at it. Yami, looking around age twelve or so, smiled out of it with his arm around another smiling boy with short, dark hair and light brown eyes. Yugi flipped the picture over, but found no clue to the other boy’s identity.
Why wasn’t this in with the other pictures he showed me?
There was no time to wonder about it. He slid the pictures back inside, latched the crate, and dragged it back upstairs and down the hall to the front door. “Here.”
Yami merely took it and turned away.
Yugi couldn’t stop himself from speaking. “Y-Yami…?”
Finally, Yami looked back. Yugi saw tears running down his cheeks, and he wanted to reach out and hold him again the way he had before when Yami had cried and looked at him with hurt like that in his face. But before he could, Yami had walked down the stairs and out the door.
Yugi thought about going after him, and then didn’t. He knew when he had crossed the line. So he returned to the living room where his mother was undoubtedly waiting to lecture him for lying. Another fight…but a fight that couldn’t possibly hurt as much as this one did.
X - X - X
Notes: The chapters are getting longer... xD This one was ten pages. Guhh...poor guys.
Good luck to everyone who still has exams left to go, and congrats to everybody who's out of school for the holiday!