Come to LA, we're all gay here. ^_^ We have gay (bi) churches and synagoges and everything else. Gay thrift shops and gay this and gay that. Probably even gay cats and dogs. And no one thinks twice about it.
my realization that I, at least, was ambivalently attractedbellatrysJuly 18 2006, 19:40:56 UTC
involved our college's senior year theatrical production of "Into the Woods" and a soprano's solo and me having to go out onto the fire stairs to catch my breath...
Aha! My first realization involved a really nice picture of Roma Downey in a white shirt and jeans, all lounging and having long hair and being hot, which assaulted me while I was being a good little Christian girl and looking up Touched by an Angel websites. (It wasn't fair, dammit! :D) I had to close the browser and go play a few very long games of Solitaire during which I really wasn't concentrating and um...yeah, I've been there. XD
remember, I've long said that I think everyone *is* a little bit bibellatrysJuly 21 2006, 04:22:45 UTC
and that the continuum scale rather than "either-or" makes the most sense (I've *met* a couple people who insist that they're TOTALLY straight and not attracted in the least, ever, to ANYONE of the same sex in any way - but generally speaking, I think they do protest too much their straightness, given other things they've said/done - and the fact that they feel this need to make sure that we all know that THEY'RE TOTALLY NOT GAY AT ALL, NOSSIRREEBOB! cough*melgibson*cough)
What, after all, is the whole bishonen thing about (swoon!), and its analogue, the "manly" heroine - or the whole androgynous fashion thing, esp. the 18th c, when simultaneously, women were allowed on stage, and writers started writing women-dressed-as-men, *kissing* men, taking the scandalousness of Shakespearean gender-bending to a new level - while men wore long hair and makeup and lace...? Whole swathes of pop culture past have revolved around the humorous idea that the heroine can put on trousers and a macho hat and be *just as hot a guy* as she was a girl,
( ... )
I have no useful advice for coming out in the Bible Belt. Nor for coming out to parents, which I still (*wrinkles nose at self*) haven't actually done myself...I have been getting better at coming out to random people, though, without having to resort to nonsequiturial phrases like, "Nice weather we're having, and I'm gay." Practice makes...if not perfect, at least better. :) But it helps that most people up here are cool about it, and it's different in Tennessee...
but I'm afraid to come out because I've only recently realized myself and I don't want to sound like I'm just jumping on the bandwagon,
I think that's the sort of thing one is only afraid that other people will think about oneself, not something people actually end up thinking. :)
because, didn't you know, there's more hope for bisexuals than for gays because they're at least half normal
*sigh* If it weren't for all the squicky misperceptions, I'd say bisexuals get the best of both worlds. :)
I'm not in the closet and I'm not out of it.The closet is never an
( ... )
*sigh* If it weren't for all the squicky misperceptions, I'd say bisexuals get the best of both worlds. :)
Haha. Well...sometimes I think we do. XD Though it's not like I chose this, but it is kind of handy. Although, you know, the window of available partners is really not that much bigger, because lots of straight guys and gay girls are squicked out by the thought, and then of course there's the ridiculously large contingent of people who persistently believe that we're just confused/greedy/afraid to come all the way out. But...yeah, we do get to appreciate a little more of humanity. :)
And there's nothing wrong with deciding not to come out to someone.Ahhhhhh, that's nice to hear. ::phew:: I still worry that when I make an executive decision not to come out to the guy on the corner with the shotgun shouting about hellbound sodomites, I'm being, oh, ashamed or cowardly or something. But that's a wonderful bit of information to know, coming from someone a little
( ... )
Although, you know, the window of available partners is really not that much bigger, because lots of straight guys and gay girls are squicked out by the thought, and then of course there's the ridiculously large contingent of people who persistently believe that we're just confused/greedy/afraid to come all the way out.
Think of it as a way of conveniently eliminating the not-cool people from your pool of potential partners before you even start. :D
I still worry that when I make an executive decision not to come out to the guy on the corner with the shotgun shouting about hellbound sodomites, I'm being, oh, ashamed or cowardly or something. But that's a wonderful bit of information to know, coming from someone a little more practised at this whole gay thing than I am. :) Thank you! ::glomp::*glomps back* :) I think not coming out to the guy on the corner with the shotgun (scary much? *shudder*) is the only sensible choice. Even sans the shotgun, I wouldn't want to do it; you're not going to change his mind, and you put your
( ... )
IIRC, you came out to me in an email, within the first month or so of our school acquaintance. There may have been mentions of Jadzia, or we might have been discussing the relative merits of various actors and actresses in the LOTR films. But I distinctly remember you phrasing it as, "I'm sort of bisexual, but more attracted to my own gender." I had just--like two days before that--read an article in a magazine in the SUBtext bookstore by a lesbian girl saying that she would sometimes say that to people, because of it sounding less threatening, instead of saying straight off I AM GAY, NADIIN. So, I immediately coded your response as, "Okay, she's probably actually gay, not only bi," which did turn out to be pretty true. And then of course we decided that you could have Jadzia, I would have Julian, and everyone would be happy (so long as we both got to snog Janeway and philosophize about Data
( ... )
:D I totally want to move here and join the church, if only for the bishop and Reverend Susan (the priest at the church I went to).
And Bishop Gene is a hobbit. :D I met him yesterday, and he is. All short and round and clever and cheerful and fond of food. Very Tolkien-like. And um...one suspects one should have more respect for the Bishop. >_>
I suppose I would be lying if I said I was surprised ;)
Seriously though....it won't make a difference to the people that really matter, and if they are truly surprised, they obviously didn't know you that well. All I can say is that Jesus loves you, and I'm with you (and I'll be praying for you too).
*waves 'I *heart* Rosie' banner*
Chris and I were just having a discussion about bisexuality on Monday (after went to Phantom of the Opera ZOMGZ0RS!!!), and he said he never actually knew anyone who was bisexual...and your face popped into my head.
*hugs* I really miss you tons, and I wish I could be with you right now so we could just sit down with a couple pints of Ben & Jerry's and watch some Voyager or DS9...and you could try to bring me over to the dark side of the Jadzia vs. Ezri debate :)
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On a side note, because this idea just occured to me and I want to tell someone, I'm thinking of starting a GSA in my school.
AAAAAAAAA.
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...Bellatrys, ambivalent?
...HOPE! XD
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What, after all, is the whole bishonen thing about (swoon!), and its analogue, the "manly" heroine - or the whole androgynous fashion thing, esp. the 18th c, when simultaneously, women were allowed on stage, and writers started writing women-dressed-as-men, *kissing* men, taking the scandalousness of Shakespearean gender-bending to a new level - while men wore long hair and makeup and lace...? Whole swathes of pop culture past have revolved around the humorous idea that the heroine can put on trousers and a macho hat and be *just as hot a guy* as she was a girl, ( ... )
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but I'm afraid to come out because I've only recently realized myself and I don't want to sound like I'm just jumping on the bandwagon,
I think that's the sort of thing one is only afraid that other people will think about oneself, not something people actually end up thinking. :)
because, didn't you know, there's more hope for bisexuals than for gays because they're at least half normal
*sigh* If it weren't for all the squicky misperceptions, I'd say bisexuals get the best of both worlds. :)
I'm not in the closet and I'm not out of it.The closet is never an ( ... )
Reply
::falls about giggling::
*sigh* If it weren't for all the squicky misperceptions, I'd say bisexuals get the best of both worlds. :)
Haha. Well...sometimes I think we do. XD Though it's not like I chose this, but it is kind of handy. Although, you know, the window of available partners is really not that much bigger, because lots of straight guys and gay girls are squicked out by the thought, and then of course there's the ridiculously large contingent of people who persistently believe that we're just confused/greedy/afraid to come all the way out. But...yeah, we do get to appreciate a little more of humanity. :)
And there's nothing wrong with deciding not to come out to someone.Ahhhhhh, that's nice to hear. ::phew:: I still worry that when I make an executive decision not to come out to the guy on the corner with the shotgun shouting about hellbound sodomites, I'm being, oh, ashamed or cowardly or something. But that's a wonderful bit of information to know, coming from someone a little ( ... )
Reply
Think of it as a way of conveniently eliminating the not-cool people from your pool of potential partners before you even start. :D
I still worry that when I make an executive decision not to come out to the guy on the corner with the shotgun shouting about hellbound sodomites, I'm being, oh, ashamed or cowardly or something. But that's a wonderful bit of information to know, coming from someone a little more practised at this whole gay thing than I am. :) Thank you! ::glomp::*glomps back* :) I think not coming out to the guy on the corner with the shotgun (scary much? *shudder*) is the only sensible choice. Even sans the shotgun, I wouldn't want to do it; you're not going to change his mind, and you put your ( ... )
Reply
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And Bishop Gene is a hobbit. :D I met him yesterday, and he is. All short and round and clever and cheerful and fond of food. Very Tolkien-like. And um...one suspects one should have more respect for the Bishop. >_>
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Seriously though....it won't make a difference to the people that really matter, and if they are truly surprised, they obviously didn't know you that well. All I can say is that Jesus loves you, and I'm with you (and I'll be praying for you too).
*waves 'I *heart* Rosie' banner*
Chris and I were just having a discussion about bisexuality on Monday (after went to Phantom of the Opera ZOMGZ0RS!!!), and he said he never actually knew anyone who was bisexual...and your face popped into my head.
*hugs*
I really miss you tons, and I wish I could be with you right now so we could just sit down with a couple pints of Ben & Jerry's and watch some Voyager or DS9...and you could try to bring me over to the dark side of the Jadzia vs. Ezri debate :)
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...Jadzia, all the way, if you ask me. :)
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...EZRI F0REVAH ZOMG! ::throws confetti::
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