Comment to NY Times blog

[aenodia]

I posted the following comment to a blog at the NY Times Bad News Delivered Badlywhich related to the article Doctor and Patient - Before the Diagnosis, a Dance of EvasionMy husband has lived with Bladder Cancer since 2001. Last year the urologist had to tell him that the cancer had gone up into the ureters and kidneys on both sides. I remember

Comments

[amaebi]

I wonder whether medical personnel are typically trained in communication, let alone giving bad news. Maybe they are, now, as opposed to the Bad Old Days of deliberate training in callousness.

I was struck by the gentleness and patience of the palliative care team who met with my church secretary's family, back in August-- but also by what came across as a lean toward letting G. decide to wind down. I didn't know whether it was a professional inclination based on being in the business or based on G.'s medical status, or whether they wanted to make sure G. had clear support if he chose to let go.

I am so sorry that you two have such bad news to deal with, over and over, and I salute the gallantry you both show.

[aenodia]

After reading some of the rest of the comments it became clear that communication with patients is one of 6 core curriculum items. So the medical schools are expected to teach it. Some people may not have it in them to be compassionate.

Some days I think we just face the bad news with numbness as we have had so much in the past two years. There have been good things too but now they are overshadowed by the current state of affairs.

[annearchy]

I was not directly involved with my mother's medical care in 2005, when she began her long decline. I would not be surprised if my sisters who were involved heard similar evasions, though IMO it helped that we have three medical professionals (2 doctors and a nurse) in the family; they did the heavy lifting in terms of dealing with the doctors and trying to find out exactly what they thought was going on.

*hugs to J&D*

[oakwind]

We think about you both often. What energy I can I send to both of you as well. Things have been very difficult for you and wayfinder in these last many years now. I wish for good things, pleasure, fun, and good times for you.