i love peanuts. last night i studied for my midterm till like 3 in the morning for my 8am class... but when i woke up it was 9:30. that shit fucking hurt. every time i eat a snickers i say in my head, "hungry? why wait... grab a snickers." it never fails. i wonder about the diet patch. hmm. i'm sleepy. nighty night.

as much as i hate being alone. i love the freedom from bullshit. how does someone fuel off of manipulation? feeding themselves lies, getting high off of drama. it's a fucking joke. undermining the entire species of the web which you fucking built, leaves a chuckle, which no one minds spitting in your face. deserving of your own, playing with a fib ( Read more... )

i hate living. i hate waking up. i hate opening my eyes and looking in the mirror. i hate going to school. i hate waking up early. i hate studying. i hate food. i hate eating. i hate smoking. i hate bitches. i hate being cold. i hate obsessions. i hate compulsions. i hate cleaning urinals. i hate being ripped off. i hate sex. i hate lovers. i hate ( Read more... )

i just got 98% fat free chocolate brownie breyers ice cream. and it sucked. i also got whipped cream. that was decent. today i took a nap and woke up like all sweatin and shit. and chase was tryin to wake me up and i swear i felt like i was all drugged up sweating, and hot. then hilary woke me up and she was bein really ill with everyone. it freaks ( Read more... )

hilary's pregnant my last update deleted fuck. i'm excited. chase new he told her like a week ago... he's like push mommy get the babies out. he says there's two. that would be insane. i have to go to work and close. i hate long nites. i dream about everyone at night. love ya later. peace

i moved across the street. our house is bigger and nicer. you know what is a fucked word.... nice. i don't like school. it sucks. my job is fun. chase is sweet. hilary's sweeter. andrew's awesome. i don't ever want to leave my house. my room is nice too. my new phone number is 910 892-7658 but it's not hooked up yet. it will be in like a week er so ( Read more... )

for anyone who passes this by, i got my pc fixed. i can use this shit. i am lonely. i miss my friends. i'll smoke a joint to that one. i heard that.

i miss your face. fingertips pushed away.  lonely for your touch.

m*e*l*t

b*a*n*a*n*a

promise me you won't fuck it up. if i could take everything back i would. slice my fuckin throat. honestly it would make everything so much simpler. maybe not at first, but eventually, there would be less to think about. more time to spend sitting in tears. what a great fucking feeling. ultimate bliss, which i, of all people do not deserve. ( Read more... )

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