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[serawench]

So, I'm nearing the end of my first month of an outpatient treatment program - I start week four on Tuesday night (Monday is a holiday here). While therapy itself is interesting, I'm still nowhere near actually connecting to my emotions when I speak about my history.

Comments

[whirlwitch]

Congratulations for standing up for yourself with regard to your relationship. That takes guts!

I hope your family interviews go well. And good luck with finding a new doctor, I know how much of a pain that is. I've got one, but he's so far away that I have to take three busses to get there.

My house is a gigantic mess too, if that's any consolation. :)

I'm up too late, so I'll just say good night and I hope things start looking up soon.

(((hugs)))

[serve_the_lord]

It sounds like you're taking really good steps to taking care of yourself. You're setting boundaries for your family, you're working on getting better, and those are all wonderful things. It must be terrifying to think about having your family there for the interviews - I hope it goes well.

I'm glad that you're making plans to talk about your suicidal ideations in group - I sincerely hope that it helps.

My house is an atrocious wreck as well. I can't seem to find the energy to clean it, so I kind of understand how it feels.

Take care of yourself.

[sistahraven]

I have similar issues in expressing how I feel in therapy, and *especially* in group. I can talk about what I went through clinically, and very emotionless. The emotions take a long time to really connect to what I've been through. I can even logically describe the emotions, but they don't really come out.

Good for you in standing up for yourself in your relationship! It's not easy to come to the realization that someone isn't treating you as you deserve, and I'm glad you were able to see that 3 days wouldn't magically change 8 years of history - it's so easy to fall into the "honeymoon" trap! Kudos to you for spotting it and stepping out of it.

It sounds like you're doing a fantastic job of navigating some seriously treacherous waters. That takes an enormous amount of strength, resolve, and resiliency :)

[graylove]

I get really disconnected from my emotions when I talk about what happened too. Sometimes I'm able to cry, but most of the time my body's defenses don't allow me to actually react to what I'm talking about.