New Fic - Give me your reason to believe 5/?
TITLE : Give me your Reason to Believe
AUTHOR: ladyeigh (caliburn.kira)
RATING: R (NC-17 at the end)
PAIRING: VAM (Ville Valo/Bam Margera), Waycest (Mikey/Gerard)
POV: Third person
SUMMARY: Gerard and Ville have a nicotine flavoured talk....
DISCLAIMER: Not mine, didn’t happen and didn’t see anything… promise
NOTES: To Mytornromance Happy Birthday!!
This is the sequel to the long fic that I wrote for hergerbabe 'Taking Back the Life you Stole', not neccessary to have read it, but it might help!
The Fic that came first...
Or else you can read it on the community from here
chapter 1
chapter 2
chapter 3
chapter 4
The sun was warm on the polished wood, a pleasant heat through their bare feet as Ville and Gerard walked a little away from the house. Gerard had closed the sliding glass door behind him as he followed the Finn, recognising that going outside to smoke only helped if you didn’t then stand in an open entranceway! Ville had hauled two chairs next to each other, kitty corner with their backs to the sun. Immediately lighting a cigarette Ville filled his lungs and coughed slightly as he exhaled.
“You OK?”
“Cutting down seems to make me more wheezy, not less!”
“That’s odd.”
“That’s not odd my friend, it’s fucking weird!”
Gerard lit his own cigarette and leant back in the comfortable wooden chair, part of an elegantly carved set that sat on the recently varnished deck. The silence of the estate was almost complete, a slight wind rustling the only sound apart from the two men themselves. They sat in companionable quiet, letting the nicotine permeate them as they finished and re-lit.
“You doing alright?”
Ville started slightly at the query, he’d been a thousand miles - or twenty-five metres away - missing his lover’s arms even though he had left them so recently. He turned to look at the other singer, a look of contentment on his face that Gerard had not seen for too long.
“I’m getting there… we’re getting there!”
“You seem better, but then I don’t think either of us were that great in New York!”
“That I would agree with; lonely, scared and fucked off - not my finest hour!”
“The shots look good though.”
“They certainly do! How are you doing?”
“Getting there. I mean, hell - I don’t know what I mean. The recording is going well; I’m more stable that I’ve been in months, maybe ever.”
“You and Mikey?”
“Rock solid, and he’s everything to me. I actually love him more everyday that I wake up beside him - and everyday that I wake up without him!”
“Sounds good.”
“It’s incredible. I honestly thought I’d never feel this happy, almost had myself convinced that I didn’t deserve it after everything I’d done.”
“Karma isn’t that fickle a lover.”
“Karma is a whoring bitch Ville. For so long I felt like I was just stumbling around taking pain… fumbling in the dark. Mikey and MCR were the only lights and I nearly fucked that sideways too.”
“Sometimes you need that shot to make a change, take a chance.”
“A shot of ephedrine you mean?!”
Ville smiled at the reference, a knowing smirk.
“Yes, exactly. As long as its not the cyanide you drink!”
Gerard laughed then, nodding at the slightly older man.
“I still dream of it sometimes, that day. I think we all do, those of us that were there, that were even peripherally involved. I dream of falling and taking the plunge, taking charge over my fate rather than meekly accepting it.”
Ville realised where Gee’s mind had drifted.
“The Towers?”
“I saw them fall, saw the jumpers, it…”
“I know.”
Ville reached out a hand for Gerard to take. This was different from before, not a ragged mess but smoothly filed and clipped nails and soft skin with only the calluses of a musician rather than the hardened skin of neglect.
“You seem brighter, as though a weight has gone.”
“Sort of. I guess I’ve just kept on screwing my head on straight until it finally faced the right direction! Mikey… he’s listened, cajoled and then ordered - exactly when I’ve needed it.”
“I saw… the DVD was not that subtle.”
“Press haven’t picked anything up. We’re family - misconstrued perhaps but, we get away with it when you guys can’t.”
“Yeah. There is still so much ‘skater and rock star’ bullshit.”
“Like Bam not coming to the launch?”
“That was a request. Mind you after his last music party.”
“Knuckle dusters?”
“Yeah. He’s been blasé but he called me… he was totally freaked out by the whole thing.”
“I know. He called Mikey about something else and… yeah.”
“Between the two of us we’ve not exactly had the best time with legal crap.”
“Yeah, what’s happening with all that?”
“Seppo and the lawyers are all over it… and I’m spending the majority of my time either here or camped out in Lily or Migé’s spare rooms. Well, saying that I’ve crashed with Jonne, Lauri, Jussi and Jyrki… even Seppo’s been invaded.”
“What are you going to do?”
“Sell the apartment I suppose. I really don’t think I, we, can stay there for much longer.”
“You’ve always danced around it…”
“Apart from Loveline - I got so told off for that!”
“Really?”
“Yes. ‘Cannot discuss on ongoing investigations’, even on the other side of the bloody Atlantic!”
“So?”
“I lost it. Entirely. Got back from a gig in Moscow - alone. I’d had a couple of beers on the trip and I got home exhausted. All I wanted to do was call Bam and sleep. I managed to speak to him for a few minutes but the whole time-zone thing, impossible. Anyway, I knew that he’d call me back after a couple of hours so I went to get ready for bed. Then the neighbourhood fuckwit decided to kick off.”
“How so? All you said on the phone was a muttering about flowerpots and assholes.”
“Wagner at full blast through the walls, this after I got into an interesting conversation with Mikko’s aiti in the park.”
“Mikko’s aiti?”
“Oh, sorry. Lily’s mom! She still says Mikko so it’s kind of automatic to make the link in my head.”
“Like calling Ray’s mom Mrs Toro?”
Ville worked out the relationship quickly and nodded.
“Yup!”
“So she talked to you?”
“Linde dragged me out to the park to get some fresh air. Well, to be honest he doesn’t play fair and I didn’t have a chance to say no.”
“Um…”
“No, not in a bad way. Lily sent Olivia to knock on the door. So I opened up to a pleading four year old and a dread-locked guitarist with a shit eating grin on his face!”
“Nice.”
“I haven’t ever managed to say no to that child - I don’t think any of us have apart from her parents.”
“Well, what else are uncles for!”
“My point exactly! Anyway, Aiti Lindström wanted to see me, check that I was alright, that Bam was OK…”
“She knows?”
“Bam and I are about the worst kept secret in the history of music, also - she’s Linde’s mom, practically my mom. I’ve known her since I was thirteen!”
“Oh. One of those friends mom’s.”
“Uh-huh. Anyway my neighbour had been spreading rumours. That I threw wild and raucous parties, that I’m an addict, a junkie and an alcoholic. That I keep them awake - you get the gist.”
“Yes,”
“Since I spend every moment I can in West Chester and after Minneapolis I’m not alone but with the guys I’m not sure what he thinks is going on.”
“So this night?”
“I went and knocked on the door to ask for some quiet. He turned it up so I tried again. This time he just started in; Bam, HIM, my life, that I was a sodomite, disgusting, a traitor to Finland and a coward. He had seen me come home by myself and kept asking if my faggot boyfriend had seen the light and dumped my worthless ass…”
“Holy shit Ville.”
“I saw red. I mean a total red haze descended. He slammed the door in my face so I just picked up this terracotta urn from the steps and threw it into and through his door.”
Gerard’s eyes widened, trying to marry up the image of the slender Finn with that of the Incredible Hulk that he dropped into his mind.
“Then the bastard called the police.”
AUTHOR: ladyeigh (caliburn.kira)
RATING: R (NC-17 at the end)
PAIRING: VAM (Ville Valo/Bam Margera), Waycest (Mikey/Gerard)
POV: Third person
SUMMARY: Gerard and Ville have a nicotine flavoured talk....
DISCLAIMER: Not mine, didn’t happen and didn’t see anything… promise
NOTES: To Mytornromance Happy Birthday!!
This is the sequel to the long fic that I wrote for hergerbabe 'Taking Back the Life you Stole', not neccessary to have read it, but it might help!
The Fic that came first...
Or else you can read it on the community from here
chapter 1
chapter 2
chapter 3
chapter 4
The sun was warm on the polished wood, a pleasant heat through their bare feet as Ville and Gerard walked a little away from the house. Gerard had closed the sliding glass door behind him as he followed the Finn, recognising that going outside to smoke only helped if you didn’t then stand in an open entranceway! Ville had hauled two chairs next to each other, kitty corner with their backs to the sun. Immediately lighting a cigarette Ville filled his lungs and coughed slightly as he exhaled.
“You OK?”
“Cutting down seems to make me more wheezy, not less!”
“That’s odd.”
“That’s not odd my friend, it’s fucking weird!”
Gerard lit his own cigarette and leant back in the comfortable wooden chair, part of an elegantly carved set that sat on the recently varnished deck. The silence of the estate was almost complete, a slight wind rustling the only sound apart from the two men themselves. They sat in companionable quiet, letting the nicotine permeate them as they finished and re-lit.
“You doing alright?”
Ville started slightly at the query, he’d been a thousand miles - or twenty-five metres away - missing his lover’s arms even though he had left them so recently. He turned to look at the other singer, a look of contentment on his face that Gerard had not seen for too long.
“I’m getting there… we’re getting there!”
“You seem better, but then I don’t think either of us were that great in New York!”
“That I would agree with; lonely, scared and fucked off - not my finest hour!”
“The shots look good though.”
“They certainly do! How are you doing?”
“Getting there. I mean, hell - I don’t know what I mean. The recording is going well; I’m more stable that I’ve been in months, maybe ever.”
“You and Mikey?”
“Rock solid, and he’s everything to me. I actually love him more everyday that I wake up beside him - and everyday that I wake up without him!”
“Sounds good.”
“It’s incredible. I honestly thought I’d never feel this happy, almost had myself convinced that I didn’t deserve it after everything I’d done.”
“Karma isn’t that fickle a lover.”
“Karma is a whoring bitch Ville. For so long I felt like I was just stumbling around taking pain… fumbling in the dark. Mikey and MCR were the only lights and I nearly fucked that sideways too.”
“Sometimes you need that shot to make a change, take a chance.”
“A shot of ephedrine you mean?!”
Ville smiled at the reference, a knowing smirk.
“Yes, exactly. As long as its not the cyanide you drink!”
Gerard laughed then, nodding at the slightly older man.
“I still dream of it sometimes, that day. I think we all do, those of us that were there, that were even peripherally involved. I dream of falling and taking the plunge, taking charge over my fate rather than meekly accepting it.”
Ville realised where Gee’s mind had drifted.
“The Towers?”
“I saw them fall, saw the jumpers, it…”
“I know.”
Ville reached out a hand for Gerard to take. This was different from before, not a ragged mess but smoothly filed and clipped nails and soft skin with only the calluses of a musician rather than the hardened skin of neglect.
“You seem brighter, as though a weight has gone.”
“Sort of. I guess I’ve just kept on screwing my head on straight until it finally faced the right direction! Mikey… he’s listened, cajoled and then ordered - exactly when I’ve needed it.”
“I saw… the DVD was not that subtle.”
“Press haven’t picked anything up. We’re family - misconstrued perhaps but, we get away with it when you guys can’t.”
“Yeah. There is still so much ‘skater and rock star’ bullshit.”
“Like Bam not coming to the launch?”
“That was a request. Mind you after his last music party.”
“Knuckle dusters?”
“Yeah. He’s been blasé but he called me… he was totally freaked out by the whole thing.”
“I know. He called Mikey about something else and… yeah.”
“Between the two of us we’ve not exactly had the best time with legal crap.”
“Yeah, what’s happening with all that?”
“Seppo and the lawyers are all over it… and I’m spending the majority of my time either here or camped out in Lily or Migé’s spare rooms. Well, saying that I’ve crashed with Jonne, Lauri, Jussi and Jyrki… even Seppo’s been invaded.”
“What are you going to do?”
“Sell the apartment I suppose. I really don’t think I, we, can stay there for much longer.”
“You’ve always danced around it…”
“Apart from Loveline - I got so told off for that!”
“Really?”
“Yes. ‘Cannot discuss on ongoing investigations’, even on the other side of the bloody Atlantic!”
“So?”
“I lost it. Entirely. Got back from a gig in Moscow - alone. I’d had a couple of beers on the trip and I got home exhausted. All I wanted to do was call Bam and sleep. I managed to speak to him for a few minutes but the whole time-zone thing, impossible. Anyway, I knew that he’d call me back after a couple of hours so I went to get ready for bed. Then the neighbourhood fuckwit decided to kick off.”
“How so? All you said on the phone was a muttering about flowerpots and assholes.”
“Wagner at full blast through the walls, this after I got into an interesting conversation with Mikko’s aiti in the park.”
“Mikko’s aiti?”
“Oh, sorry. Lily’s mom! She still says Mikko so it’s kind of automatic to make the link in my head.”
“Like calling Ray’s mom Mrs Toro?”
Ville worked out the relationship quickly and nodded.
“Yup!”
“So she talked to you?”
“Linde dragged me out to the park to get some fresh air. Well, to be honest he doesn’t play fair and I didn’t have a chance to say no.”
“Um…”
“No, not in a bad way. Lily sent Olivia to knock on the door. So I opened up to a pleading four year old and a dread-locked guitarist with a shit eating grin on his face!”
“Nice.”
“I haven’t ever managed to say no to that child - I don’t think any of us have apart from her parents.”
“Well, what else are uncles for!”
“My point exactly! Anyway, Aiti Lindström wanted to see me, check that I was alright, that Bam was OK…”
“She knows?”
“Bam and I are about the worst kept secret in the history of music, also - she’s Linde’s mom, practically my mom. I’ve known her since I was thirteen!”
“Oh. One of those friends mom’s.”
“Uh-huh. Anyway my neighbour had been spreading rumours. That I threw wild and raucous parties, that I’m an addict, a junkie and an alcoholic. That I keep them awake - you get the gist.”
“Yes,”
“Since I spend every moment I can in West Chester and after Minneapolis I’m not alone but with the guys I’m not sure what he thinks is going on.”
“So this night?”
“I went and knocked on the door to ask for some quiet. He turned it up so I tried again. This time he just started in; Bam, HIM, my life, that I was a sodomite, disgusting, a traitor to Finland and a coward. He had seen me come home by myself and kept asking if my faggot boyfriend had seen the light and dumped my worthless ass…”
“Holy shit Ville.”
“I saw red. I mean a total red haze descended. He slammed the door in my face so I just picked up this terracotta urn from the steps and threw it into and through his door.”
Gerard’s eyes widened, trying to marry up the image of the slender Finn with that of the Incredible Hulk that he dropped into his mind.
“Then the bastard called the police.”