Today I (unfortunately) confirmed my reasons for not doing any sort of activities that involve me standing up on stage: I apparently have a physical reaction to anxiety. There is nothing I'm actually nervous or worried about...and, yet, I'm sick to my stomach to the point of throwing up and could not stop crying for twenty minutes ( Read more... )

People think that I'm a good girl just because I'm a christian. The truth of the matter is, I'm just as bad as everyone around me. I fail at things, I do things I know I shouldn't, and I pretty much fall short of expectations every single day. The difference is that, when I bow my head and pray for God to forgive me, not only does He, but he also ( Read more... )

Only souls that have no self live for their "significant other", giving themselves completely in a one-way relationship. People need to be sure about themselves, as nothing in life stays the same. Its always changing without warning, making left turns when there's no sign of a cliff. People need to know who they are, what their dreams are and ( Read more... )

"This song is ending...but the story goes on forever."
---Ood.

...even me.

Thank you Lord.

Thank you.

...But I don't want to die.

God help me.

Please.

Saw "Alice" and enjoyed it.
Another winner for Burton/Depp/Elfman.

...and yet, right now, I feel so depressed.

Its like I want to just throw up, I'm so sick with myself.

A disgust that burns though my heart and my brain; chokes me, sitting there, in my throat.

I want to cry and throw up, then curl up and die.

I lounge on the couch, periodically getting up to wander from room to room. I rifle through the kitchen’s cupboards and the fridge, even though I know there is nothing in there. This is all just restless motions, as it is Sunday, and I am trying to keep my mind from wandering into earthly, hormonal thoughts.

It is a struggle.

This morning was the launch of the last scheduled night shuttle launch. It was so beautiful; it lit up the sky in layers of beautiful oranges and yellows, framed in the dark and navy blues of the night. As the shuttle curved up into space, it looked like a flaming arrow, shot up into the heavens and, as it faded away into our atmosphere, the stars ( Read more... )

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