1 - Why? Because of the "Great Thing"

[40yearslater]

There is a reason, although I'm unable to express it in a way that will make any sense. I can only say it's because there's this "great thing" that is eating away at me; that is prodding me to keep at it, but it won't tell me

Comments

[ba1126]

You may want to try therapy and see if they can help you figure out your feelings. I think we all look back on our 'mistakes' and wish we had done better, but if this is spoiling your life NOW, it should be looked at. Best of luck!

[40yearslater]

Thank you. Actually, therapy has been done and done and done. But I don't find it to be helpful. It's always talking talking talking about the past, how you feel about the past. It's like pulling teeth to move on to how to do better today. Which is what I want to do. This time this journal is my self-therapy and I hope to spend previous little time rehashing except for how it's affecting me now so that I can figure out what changes I can make now ... and how.

[lookintomyeyes]

If your therapists were talking about the past, I'd like to suggest they were doing it backwards.

If you can, Id recommend checking out Glasser's books on Choice Therapy.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glasser%27s_choice_theory

It should be able to get you identifying which area(s) of your life and feeling 'lesser', and begin doing things to make yourself happier.

(Its a good book, it helped me when I had to make the choice to enact strict boundaries on my parents.)

[televisionmouth]

Thankyou for recommending this. Been trying to find it. Found a copy on amazon, but don't have the money right now due to illness, but I will put it on my list to read.