[June 17th] [Red Dwarf] A Spinning Fan
Title: A Spinning Fan
Day/Theme: June 17. a waking dream
Series: Red Dwarf
Character/Pairing: Lister/Rimmer eventually
Rating: PGish
Word Count: 789
Summary: It was inspired by this sentence: 41. Real: One day Lister woke up in a psychiatric ward and a doctor told him it was all a dream brought on by excessive drinking.
shivvlan and eviltigerlily discussed it.
I told them I wouldn't write it. Then my muse stepped in. Will end up as a multi-chaptered fic. It shouldn't be too long, though.
---
Lister groaned softly and pulled himself to awakeness. The light was bright, unfamiliar and it hurt his eyes.
“Where am I?” He asked, then winced. Ow. Was he drunk or something? He couldn’t remember drinking last night, but drink tended to mess with his memory.
“Ah, good. You’re awake!” Someone sounding suspiciously like Kryten spoke quietly to someone else for a bit, but Lister couldn’t make out the words. “Relax, Dave. You’ve made a lot of progress today.”
“What?” Lister sat up, winced, and tried to look around. The light was too bright to see anything, though. “What’s happening?”
“Lie back down, Dave. You aren’t ready to be up yet.”
“Yes, I am! Tell me where I am!” Lister stood up, wobbled, and regained his balance. By now he could see the room. It looked like a hospital ward. “What happened?”
“Sit down and I’ll tell you.” A man looking suspiciously like human Kryten walked over with a clipboard. He was dressed in a doctor’s coat and had a stethoscope.
“Okay…” Lister sat down, still tensed. The last thing he could remember was arguing with Rimmer again. Had he gotten drunk after that or something?
“You’ve been very, very sick, Dave. Ever since that car accident, you’ve been here, in the Unity Hospital.” The Kryten/Doctor looked at him with pity in his eyes. “You’ve been in a coma for-“
“Don’t tell him that!” Another doctor came in. “He just woke up!”
Lister’s eyes widened. What was Holly doing with a body? Nevermind that, wasn’t he supposed to be on the Red Dwarf?
He stood up again. “I’m leaving. Now. Where are my clothes?”
The not-Holly hurried over and pushed him back down. “You’re still weak. Rest some more. Everything will be explained soon.”
“Explain now.” Lister stood back up. This was not right. He was supposed to be on the Red Dwarf.
Holly/Not Holly sighed. “Kryten, go ahead.”
Kryten/Not Kryten nodded. “Thank you, sir. As I was saying, Dave, you’ve been in a coma for the past five years. We think you’ve been living in a world of your own devising, but there’s no way of knowing. Anyway, you’re still in England. Now, Dave, would you lie down again? You still aren’t well.”
“No.” This was wrong. This was very, very wrong. He had gotten drunk on his twenty-fifth birthday, but not that drunk. “You’re wrong.”
“No, I’m not, Dave. Lie back down.”
“Stop calling me Dave! You aren’t Kryten. You don’t know me.”
Not-Kryten stared. “How did you know my name?”
Lister cursed. “This is wrong. I’m leavin’. Where are my clothing?”
Not-Holly put his hand on Lister’s arm. “You are not leaving, Lister. Lie back down. You aren’t well. You’re panicking.”
“I can bloody well panic whenever I choose! Give me my clothing!”
“No. You’re disturbing the other patients. Lie down.”
For the first time, Lister noticed his roommates. His was the bed on the far left in the room, and his first roommate to the right was sleeping. Only he wasn’t. One of his eyes was cracked open, and his fingers clenched and unclenched the sheets.
It was Rimmer. He looked different, but he was Rimmer.
Lister almost stopped looking there, but a small scream from the other end of the room attracted his attention.
It was Cat. Only, he wasn’t wearing a fancy suit, and his hair was in mad-scientist mode. He was standing on the bed, clutching the bed-sheets, and pointing at Lister. “You’re alive!”
Lister raised an eyebrow. Okay, now he knew that this wasn’t real. No way would the Cat submit to wearing hospital scrubs. Then the Cat yowled and bounded to the corner, exhibiting all of the grace the real Cat had.
Lister shook his head, almost/not-quite convinced. If this was real, Rimmer would speak up right about now -
“So we have a psych ward mate again. Charmed to meet you.” Rimmer carefully sat up, faked a yawn, and held out a hand. “I’m Arnold-” Lister cut in.
“Rimmer, I know. Go back to sleep. I can’t deal with you right now.”
“How did you know...?” Rimmer withdrew his hand and sniffed haughtily. “Nice to meet you, too.”
“Smeg this. Give me my clothing.”
“They don’t give us clothing! Yowww!” The Cat called from the corner, and proceeded to leap back onto the bed.
Lister put his head in his hands. “Sure. Whatever. I give up.”
Not-Kryten nodded. “Good. Rest well, and we’ll explain the rest later, Dave.” He left, and not-Holly followed.
Lister groaned and sat down. “I am never drinking again.”
Not-Rimmer nodded. “Capital idea! I-“ Lister interrupted again.
“Stuff it, Rimmer.” Then he laid down and tried to sleep. Maybe it would be all normal in the morning.
---
Day/Theme: June 17. a waking dream
Series: Red Dwarf
Character/Pairing: Lister/Rimmer eventually
Rating: PGish
Word Count: 789
Summary: It was inspired by this sentence: 41. Real: One day Lister woke up in a psychiatric ward and a doctor told him it was all a dream brought on by excessive drinking.
shivvlan and eviltigerlily discussed it.
I told them I wouldn't write it. Then my muse stepped in. Will end up as a multi-chaptered fic. It shouldn't be too long, though.
---
Lister groaned softly and pulled himself to awakeness. The light was bright, unfamiliar and it hurt his eyes.
“Where am I?” He asked, then winced. Ow. Was he drunk or something? He couldn’t remember drinking last night, but drink tended to mess with his memory.
“Ah, good. You’re awake!” Someone sounding suspiciously like Kryten spoke quietly to someone else for a bit, but Lister couldn’t make out the words. “Relax, Dave. You’ve made a lot of progress today.”
“What?” Lister sat up, winced, and tried to look around. The light was too bright to see anything, though. “What’s happening?”
“Lie back down, Dave. You aren’t ready to be up yet.”
“Yes, I am! Tell me where I am!” Lister stood up, wobbled, and regained his balance. By now he could see the room. It looked like a hospital ward. “What happened?”
“Sit down and I’ll tell you.” A man looking suspiciously like human Kryten walked over with a clipboard. He was dressed in a doctor’s coat and had a stethoscope.
“Okay…” Lister sat down, still tensed. The last thing he could remember was arguing with Rimmer again. Had he gotten drunk after that or something?
“You’ve been very, very sick, Dave. Ever since that car accident, you’ve been here, in the Unity Hospital.” The Kryten/Doctor looked at him with pity in his eyes. “You’ve been in a coma for-“
“Don’t tell him that!” Another doctor came in. “He just woke up!”
Lister’s eyes widened. What was Holly doing with a body? Nevermind that, wasn’t he supposed to be on the Red Dwarf?
He stood up again. “I’m leaving. Now. Where are my clothes?”
The not-Holly hurried over and pushed him back down. “You’re still weak. Rest some more. Everything will be explained soon.”
“Explain now.” Lister stood back up. This was not right. He was supposed to be on the Red Dwarf.
Holly/Not Holly sighed. “Kryten, go ahead.”
Kryten/Not Kryten nodded. “Thank you, sir. As I was saying, Dave, you’ve been in a coma for the past five years. We think you’ve been living in a world of your own devising, but there’s no way of knowing. Anyway, you’re still in England. Now, Dave, would you lie down again? You still aren’t well.”
“No.” This was wrong. This was very, very wrong. He had gotten drunk on his twenty-fifth birthday, but not that drunk. “You’re wrong.”
“No, I’m not, Dave. Lie back down.”
“Stop calling me Dave! You aren’t Kryten. You don’t know me.”
Not-Kryten stared. “How did you know my name?”
Lister cursed. “This is wrong. I’m leavin’. Where are my clothing?”
Not-Holly put his hand on Lister’s arm. “You are not leaving, Lister. Lie back down. You aren’t well. You’re panicking.”
“I can bloody well panic whenever I choose! Give me my clothing!”
“No. You’re disturbing the other patients. Lie down.”
For the first time, Lister noticed his roommates. His was the bed on the far left in the room, and his first roommate to the right was sleeping. Only he wasn’t. One of his eyes was cracked open, and his fingers clenched and unclenched the sheets.
It was Rimmer. He looked different, but he was Rimmer.
Lister almost stopped looking there, but a small scream from the other end of the room attracted his attention.
It was Cat. Only, he wasn’t wearing a fancy suit, and his hair was in mad-scientist mode. He was standing on the bed, clutching the bed-sheets, and pointing at Lister. “You’re alive!”
Lister raised an eyebrow. Okay, now he knew that this wasn’t real. No way would the Cat submit to wearing hospital scrubs. Then the Cat yowled and bounded to the corner, exhibiting all of the grace the real Cat had.
Lister shook his head, almost/not-quite convinced. If this was real, Rimmer would speak up right about now -
“So we have a psych ward mate again. Charmed to meet you.” Rimmer carefully sat up, faked a yawn, and held out a hand. “I’m Arnold-” Lister cut in.
“Rimmer, I know. Go back to sleep. I can’t deal with you right now.”
“How did you know...?” Rimmer withdrew his hand and sniffed haughtily. “Nice to meet you, too.”
“Smeg this. Give me my clothing.”
“They don’t give us clothing! Yowww!” The Cat called from the corner, and proceeded to leap back onto the bed.
Lister put his head in his hands. “Sure. Whatever. I give up.”
Not-Kryten nodded. “Good. Rest well, and we’ll explain the rest later, Dave.” He left, and not-Holly followed.
Lister groaned and sat down. “I am never drinking again.”
Not-Rimmer nodded. “Capital idea! I-“ Lister interrupted again.
“Stuff it, Rimmer.” Then he laid down and tried to sleep. Maybe it would be all normal in the morning.
---