I didn't nap yesterday and I couldn't sleep last night, couldn't sleep couldn't sleep couldn't sleep then some jerkwad out front at 6am started slamming what sounded like the back doors of a empty fullsize van which I tried to ignore then at 7am almost sharp they started a GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING WOOD CHIPPER. Right in front of our house. A fucking ( Read more... )

I've started calling Penny my kookaburra because the last week or so has consisted of HYSTERICAL LAUGHTER at absolutely everything. Not that I'm complaining, mind you, but it's weird. She also slept a stretch of 6.5 hours last night, which is TOTALLY AMAZING for her. She normally goes 1-3 hours at a time, and the night previous she was up at 3am ( Read more... )

As God is my witness, I saw a fancy dressed bottle blonde walking a BUNNY on a leash down a sidewalk. Hop hop sniff, hop sniff ( Read more... )

Thanks to all the rain a couple weeks ago and the hot weather the past week, my daffodils are already several inches high. Pretty but stupid, perfect for Southern California

Sometimes I feel like I've been playing dumb so long that I'm no longer playing.

Similac sent me a packet in the mail congratulating me on my pregnancy and included prenatal coupons. Do they know something I don't?!

I put De La Soul's Three Feet High and Rising on the stereo today. Penny started smiling and laughing. Quick poll:

Poll

Mama's all fine and good, until Daddy's in sight. Then there is absolutely nothing Mama can do to win Baby's love back. It is Daddy or nothing. And usually Daddy is trying to work, and cannot cuddle and play. Oh, woe is Baby. She tells everyone who will listen how distraught she is.

Growing up I had a speech impediment. I still do, occasionally; my Rs come out as AHs or Ws, what my mother generously called a Boston accent. In reality my bad days sound more Elmer Fudd than Matt Damon. My tongue twists over Rs and Ws and Ls: one of the hardest words to say is world, followed closely by wolf. I have to stop and think about ( Read more... )

Two times two times

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