Child Of Grace: Chapter 36 - Solitary Serenade
ZeldaQueen: And yet even more goddammed angsting and summarizing. God, I hate this Sue!
Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
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Chapter 36: Solitary Serenade
Alright, so we start off with a flashback/recap of the cliffhanger of the last chapter. I honestly fail to see the point of any cliffhangers in this thing. They’re less threatening than those of a Goosebumps book (apologies to Goosebumps, don’t mean to insult the series). So yeah. As we all expect, this leads the way to Snape going on about how poor little Holly is an abused kitten, sucks for her. Holly, of course, spends this entire conversation dragging her feet and acting sick and once again, I can not understand at all why she’s so upset. Like I said, she doesn’t seem the least bit ashamed of the abuse or embarrassed that her problems are being handled by someone else or something believable like that. As for Snape, I’m divided. On one hand, I find it unbelievably grating that he (along with EVERY OTHER GODDAMMED CHARACTER) is centering his life around the angst of this little bitch, who has done pretty much nothing to deserve this much attention. Seriously, Harry Potter did more than her and he didn’t get this much fucking scrutiny in his life. On the other hand though, we do get glimpses of Snape actually calling Holly out on being a dolt, so yeah.
Anyway, this entire thing is just painful and boring and stupid and banal and if I must suffer, so must you I know you’d hate to miss it, so here we go!
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"Do you have anything you wish to say, Miss Potter?" he inquired, voice holding a peculiar note.
ZeldaQueen: (Snape) “Anything along the lines of ‘I am an irredeemable Mary Sue’?”
"No, nothing I wish to say, sir," she replied without even opening her eyes.
ZeldaQueen: Wow, what a bitch. This guy is going out of character just to see that she’s alright and she isn’t cooperating in the slightest. Anyway, doesn’t she complain elsewhere that NOBODY CARES ABOUT HER SUFFERING, yet here we have people caring and she’s complaining.
BITCH, MAKE UP YOUR MIND!
The Potions master made an odd sound, half-way between a snort and a growl. "Perhaps I should rephrase then, Miss Potter. I will speak, and you will listen."
ZeldaQueen: Go Snape! Curse her tits off!
He crossed his arms over his chest. "Several Prefects approached me with concerns about your home life, as did an Auror, Mr. Shacklebolt. I believe you know his niece Titania."
ZeldaQueen: Yet again, why the fuck are so many people focusing their lives around this one problem? Also, if the Ministry and Dumbledore are nosing into her business as much as we’ve been led to believe, why haven’t they noticed it before this? Why…just why? I hate this fic
Holly's eyelids slid open, and she looked at him carefully. She fought the urge to shift in her seat, doing her utmost to formulate a response. However, she was apparently taking too long as her teacher continued.
ZeldaQueen: This exposition is taking too long! Get on with it!
"Auror Shacklebolt has graciously agreed to let me deal with this matter," he stated, tone suggesting just how ungracious the other man had been.
ZeldaQueen: Really? I never could have figured that out!
"If I do not, he most assuredly will. Something I cannot allow since it will inevitably enter the Ministry into the equation."
ZeldaQueen: Okay, what’s up with the Ministry here? On one hand, we’re told that they’re Evil Folks who will somehow slander and persecute Holly and won’t give her a moment’s peace and force her to live with the Dursleys. Now we’re told that since they’re aware of her abusive homelife, they’re all gung-ho to take steps to deal with the situation. This is…somehow treated as a bad thing? What? I’m so confused!
He let her stew for moment.
ZeldaQueen: He then stirred, added a few spices, and offered the remains to Mrs. Lovette. It was their understanding the Sue Pies were sickeningly sweet, but good for an occasional guilty pleasure
"Now, as to the matter at hand," the man went on smoothly, "your relatives care leaves much to be desired. It does not take a genius to see you're undernourished and underweight. Far too small for your age.
ZeldaQueen: And no one noticed this before now? It’s all she goes on about!
Holly scowled at that, but he simply ignored her.
ZeldaQueen: Okay, what the hell? He’s pointing out that she’s underweight, something which seems to hardly be her fault, and she gets pissed? What’s up with that?
"I am also aware of past complaints filed by your primary school, suspicions of neglect. Strangely, there never seemed to be any follow-up by the Muggle authorities. Perhaps Vernon Dursley's connections at work," Professor Snape mused.
ZeldaQueen: Yes, because we all know that drill companies are so influential in regards to the media and police. Look suethor, the fact that Vernon’s job was so boring and pointless was a joke in the book! It was meant to show how boring and pointless and superficial the family was! Shut up!
"That does not even cover the incident last August with that… woman. This all seems to suggest some form of abuse."
ZeldaQueen: *tiredly* “Suggest”. Right, with all the flinching and angsting and…let’s just leave it at that
The girl opened her mouth but was cut off.
ZeldaQueen: “Did I ever tell you how I got these scars?” the Joker casually asked, as the Sue writhed in pain
"Do not deny it, Miss Potter," he inserted tersely.
ZeldaQueen: I don’t think “inserted” is the verb you’re looking for
Her Head of House regarded her for a moment, face shrewd and calculating.
ZeldaQueen: (Snape) “Now I only have to hold out for a few more seconds, before that poisoned spork I got from Balthazar is ready”
"By this stage it does not matter.
ZeldaQueen: (Snape) “You are a Sue and the sporkers are calling for your sparkly head on a platter”
It will be very easy to gather all the evidence I need, and regardless, you will be removed from their care."
ZeldaQueen: (Snape) “And then, you will be shoved down the Pit of Sues, where there is no escape. Why am I talking like this again?”
"Professor?" Holly nearly jumped to her feet. "How? Won't that involve the Ministry? I have to go back!"
ZeldaQueen: (Sue) “How will I angst otherwise?”
Seriously, how stupid is she? Doesn’t she go on about how smart Dumbledore and Snape and her teachers are? Doesn’t she think they’ve figured this out already?
"You do not," the Potions master insisted rather firmly.
ZeldaQueen: (Snape) “Into the Pit you go! Please give my regards to Rose Potter and Ariana Black”
"And there are ways around the Ministry."
ZeldaQueen: Sideways, backways, top ways, and roundabout
This time, Holly did rise.
ZeldaQueen: What, is she ascending to a higher plane of existence or something?
And now standing, her nose was sadly only chest-level. She craned her head to stare directly in his eyes, expression grim but defiant.
ZeldaQueen: Snape promptly shoved her back into her seat. “Do not even dream of intimidating me, you silly girl,” he snarled. “I have lost the love of my life, watched the deaths of countless innocents, stole secrets from under Voldemort’s flat nose, fought off thousands of Sues, and been hit on by a blind idiot. If you ever try to act threatening towards me again, I will stab out your pretty little eyes with a spork and leave you for the HMS STFU to do with as they please”
"But I have to return! What about the… erm…" She hesitated, not certain how much he knew about the blood protections.
ZeldaQueen: ‘Cause you know, Snape’s stupid and certainly isn’t privy to stuff like that, and definitely can’t figure it out on his own like she could. How the fuck did she even figure it out, again?
The very reason she had to stay with the Dursleys.
ZeldaQueen: Angst
"I know about the blood wards, you foolish girl," Snape put in heatedly, looking for all the world like he wanted nothing more to grab her by the shoulders and shake sense into her.
ZeldaQueen: *very heartened* Do it Snape! Do it now! I’ll help!
He settled for towering over her, even if the effect was somewhat unintentional.
ZeldaQueen: Unintentional? Hardly
"Do you honestly believe the headmaster will allow you to remain there? Did you not for a moment stop to think that the protections work properly or even at all given their behaviour towards you?"
ZeldaQueen: Okay…well that sort of makes sense. The blood magic was just as reliant on Petunia’s love for Harry and Lily. Although I have two questions. The first I shall ask in a bit. The second, why the fuck didn’t Dumbledore realize this sooner??? He’s been keeping tabs on Holly, hasn’t he? Why wouldn’t he notice before this, “Oh that’s not working and she’s being abused, better try something else”.
IDIOTS! ALL OF THEM! HURRY SNAPE, ESCAPE WHILE YOU’RE REMOTELY CANON!!!
Holly blinked. "Well… I… that is to say… it had possibly occurred to me." She shifted her weight helplessly, head dropping. "I know that I can't go back there, Professor, but I still need that protection."
ZeldaQueen: He just said the blood protection doesn’t work! My God, this bint is stupid!!!
He fought to keep his hands from inching forward.
ZeldaQueen: Yes! Strangle her! Please!
"The blood wards do not work at all, idiot child! They no longer exist!" he practically shouted but somehow restrained himself.
ZeldaQueen: Don’t restrain yourself! Scream away! You’re right, she’s an idiot!
"Whatever protection existed has now dissolved completely. It is gone."
"Then… but… what am I supposed to do now?" she asked, doing her best to not tremble.
ZeldaQueen: (Sue) “Curses! He’s starting to free himself from my spell! I’d best act like a wounded gazelle, to garner sympathy!”
"I don't..." The girl swallowed thickly as she tried to fight the sudden lump in her throat.
She shook her head, mind a jumble of information that she was desperately trying to sort.
ZeldaQueen: Given what we’ve seen of her intelligence, that sorting shouldn’t last too long
Holly had only stayed with the Dursleys this long because of the blood wards.
ZeldaQueen: *holds head in hands* Once again, how long has she known about the blood wards? And why not run away before then?
She needed it to protect her from Voldemort, when and not if he returned. But if what her professor said was true, then it hadn't meant anything. All this time she had put up with them had done her no good. It was worthless, completely worthless. It had all been for nothing. Nothing at all.
ZeldaQueen: Translation - BLAHHHHH, WANGSTWANGSTWANGSTWANGSTWANGST!!!! POOR ME, I SUFFERED ABUSE! IT WAS ALL FOR NOTHING! IT’S NOT LIKE I EVER TRIED TO IMPROVE THE SITUATION OR ANYTHING AND IT’S NOT LIKE PEOPLE ARE WORKING NOW TO FIX THE QUALITY OF MY LIVING! OH WOE IS ME, DAMMIT!
Maker, she was such an idiot.
ZeldaQueen: Yes, yes she is. And am I the only one who sees her go on about “Maker” and imagines her cursing at those items from the Harvest Moon series?
She should have realised sooner. Blaise had been right all along, but her best friend wasn't here at the moment. He couldn't help her through this. She was on her own, something Holly should be rather used to because of the Dursleys.
ZeldaQueen: THEN WHY IS SHE ANGSTING ABOUT IT? For all she goes on about how she’s used to being alone and betrayed and hated on, she sure does bitch and moan when it happens to her!
And how everything came back to them. To that family. But not her family. She was just a relative. An inconvenient and unwanted addition. A heavy and bothersome burden they couldn't wait to get rid of, to throw away with the rest of the rubbish.
ZeldaQueen: Hold on, I just know the world’s smallest violin is around here, somewhere
Holly's hands shook as she clenched them into fists. There was a burning behind her eyes and in her throat. The girl felt the sudden urge to cry in that instant, to let her tears run free and never stop. And even years later she wasn't entirely sure why she didn't. Maybe she was simply too shell-shocked for it. Or perhaps it was what her Head of House did next.
ZeldaQueen: He put on a skirt and danced the hula
He placed his hands on her shoulders and very gently lowered her back into her seat. A bottle was pressed to her lips, and she drank automatically, instantly fleeing a tingling calm spread throughout her body.
ZeldaQueen: Yes! He poisoned her! GO SNAPE!!!
Holly shook her head again to clear her thoughts, vaguely hearing him give a sigh and the scrap of another chair across the floor as he sat down in front of her. She blinked, only to see his dark eyes gazing back at her.
Snape spoke after a moment. "I have made arrangements.
ZeldaQueen: - of flowers. Turns out the Potion’s master has a talent for that sort of thing
You will not be going back, Miss Potter. I can assure you of that." He said the last softly, normal sneer gone from his voice.
ZeldaQueen: Goodbye, vaguely cannon Snape. You shall be missed.
"Mr. Zabini is most insistent that you simply stay with him for the foreseeable future. I am inclined to agree." He allowed that to sink in for a minute. "And that is why I approached Erendiria Zabini on this matter. She was most eager to foster you until you come of age."
ZeldaQueen: I think the suethor missed the entire point of the Dumbledore’s explanation about why Harry didn’t get a foster family. Whatever
Despite the Calming draught, Holly's eyebrows rose nearly even with her hairline.
ZeldaQueen: Either she’s got one hell of a high set of eyebrows or really stretchy skin
"Sir?"
He seemed mildly amused at her confusion but thankfully explained, "Fostering is a long and established tradition in our world, most especially for Muggleborns.
ZeldadQueen: And Muggles. Muggles have foster families too!
It has fallen out of favour in the last century or so, given the increase in anti-Muggle sentiment. However, it is still practiced." The man smirked, obviously very pleased with himself.
ZeldaQueen: Is he secretly planning on sending her into the foster care of a chimera or something? *is hopeful*
"Fostering?" Holly repeated, synapses sluggish as she tried to wrap her brain around such a novel concept. "What does that actually mean?"
ZeldaQueen: “Such a novel concept”?!? YOU IDIOT, HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW ABOUT THIS? AREN’T YOU SUPPOSED TO BE WELL-READ???
"A fostering is in many ways similar to an apprenticeship, though they are most assuredly not the same thing." He paused, taking in her still confused expression, and sighed again.
ZeldaQueen: What? How on Earth would she possibly be confused by the explanation “It’s the same as, but different from”? [/sarcasm]
"Think of it as a temporary adoption, one where a child goes to live with a Wizarding family for a space of time. This is how Muggleborns were once introduced to our world, how they learned its intricacies and customs."
ZeldaQueen: There’s more shit in that explanation than in the Agean stables
She nodded slowly, sitting back in her seat. "I think that I understand, but won't people find this odd? I mean," Holly clarified, "we're doing this to keep the Ministry from becoming involved, but won't this make them suspicious?"
ZeldaQueen: Why would the Ministry care? The Ministry didn’t give two figs about Harry’s life until the fifth book onward. And even then, it was only because he was causing them trouble
The Potions master considered her question with an appraising air. "In centuries past, it was a great honour to foster children; many still consider it to be. And given that it is common knowledge you live with Muggles, no one will think twice of a Wizarding family wanting to foster you."
ZeldaQueen: STOP SUEING THIS UP! IT’S A COMMON CONCEPT!!!
He added with a hint of what she thought was disdain, "You have actually received numerous offers in the past, though Dumbledore as your intermediary dealt with those."
She tilted her head at that but let it by without comment.
ZeldaQueen: Yes, time to bash Dumbledore. Pay no heed to the fact that the suethor was merely copying his canon self, which actually had reasonable motivations for his actions
"Nevertheless," Professor Snape continued, "this is a perfect excuse. It effectively removes you from your relatives' custody without needing to involve the Ministry. It will be as though you are a member of the Zabini family. Legally and magically, you will be their responsibility until the fostering ends or you come of age. For all intents and purposes, they will be your guardians. They will have the final say in all that you do."
ZeldaQueen: That’s going to make the ceaseless flirting between herself and Blaise mighty awkward
Holly swallowed hard.
ZeldaQueen: That’s what she said
A family, even a foster one, sounded wonderful. And the Zabinis were very fond of her already. Perhaps this could really work.
ZeldaQueen: That’s right, all that angsting for nothing. God, this fic sucks!
"And… and the Dursleys?" she asked with a false lightness. "What will happen to them?"
ZeldaQueen: They’ll probably be tortured by Tom Riddle Jr., Malfoy, Blaise, and Holly
"I am aware that prosecution is out of the question at this present time, but we will most assuredly deal with your relatives at some point in the future." His dark eyes glittered malevolently in the faint light, a promise of retribution. "There are ways other than the Ministry to enact justice."
ZeldaQueen: Yep, looks like I’m pretty much right
Holly wisely decided not to ask, instead casting her mind for another topic.
ZeldaQueen: Yes Holly, just ignore the unpleasant implications of that
"The fostering… when will it take effect? I assume that you still need the Dursleys' permission for it in the first place, but I don't think that will be a problem. They're eager to be rid of me."
ZeldaQueen: As evidenced by the fact that they took her in and cared for her for thirteen years…what.
"Quite likely," Snape responded, sneer evident on his lips.
ZeldaQueen: STOP SNEERING!!!
"Lady Zabini and I will be visiting your relatives later this month or possibly in May, after she has recovered from the birth of her child. You need not even be present when the agreement is signed."
"What about Professor Dumbledore?" Holly questioned as something occurred to her. "What are you going to tell him?"
ZeldaQueen: I really don’t get what’s up with Dumbledore here. Why would he care? He only sent Harry to live with the Dursleys because of the blood protection. If he is told it doesn’t work, why would he mind if Holly’s sent to live with someone else?
"I do not need his permission to arrange a fostering for a student in my own House," the man inserted with a faintly snide tone. "As for the true reason for your leaving… the headmaster already knows. I informed him myself just a few days ago. He also agreed to let me settle this matter."
ZeldaQueen: So…what’s the conflict here, again?
The girl's heart thumped in her chest. "He already knows? And Re-Professor Lupin?"
"Lupin is undoubtedly aware of your situation as well."
ZeldaQueen: Why does Lupin matter?
"I see," she commented, inner calm fading as her insides squirmed.
Thankfully, the professor didn't say anything else, and they sat in silence for a several minutes. The Potions master was unreadable behind his usual mask. Holly, on the other hand, was too deep in thought to care what she looked like.
ZeldaQueen: GET ON WITH IT!
"I believe that covers everything," Professor Snape finally said as he rose to his feet. "I will meet with you again once the fostering is formally arranged, Miss Potter."
ZeldaQueen: Right. I formally propose we organize a manhunt for the conflict of this series. It’ll be fun! Just like searching for Mel’s Hole or the Chimera House.
Holly likewise stood, studying him as he moved to the door. Her eyes narrowed as she considered how smoothly he had dealt with the entire matter. It was all too easy for this to have been the first time.
ZeldaQueen: That’s because the suethor was organizing it all
"You've done this before, haven't you?" the girl realised in burst of clarity. "Set up a fostering to get a student away from their family.
ZeldaQueen: I swear, if it turns out that it’s Tom Riddle…
Snape stiffened. "Yes, I have," he acknowledged softly, releasing the spells on his door. "And I will most likely do it again in the future."
ZeldaQueen: SNAPE IS NOT A WOOBIE! HE WOULDN’T CARE!
Holly didn't know what to say to that, quietly standing for a few heartbeats before looking at him again. "Thank you, Professor," she said, trying her best to convene her complete sincerity.
ZeldaQueen: Shouldn’t be too hard. The Sue’s sincerity is about as deep as a tablespoon
He inclined my head. "I could hardly allow one of my charges to come to harm. Further, Kingsley Shacklebolt would mount my head on his wall for anything less."
ZeldaQueen: Ha ha! Isn’t Kingsley in charge of finding Sirius? Why would he stick his nose into this so much?
Holly somehow managed not to snigger.
ZeldaQueen: Yes, because that’s so funny. *rolls eyes*
She instead nodded and quickly left, feeling his eyes on her as she walked out the door and down the hallway.
ZeldaQueen: Snape’s death trap went off right on schedule and Holly’s head splattered against the wall. “Now, perhaps, my students can regrow their spines,” Snape muttered. “I must get Filch to clean up this mess”
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So yeah. After all of that, we get a scene change and a time jump. We’re now told that it’s “Ostara”, which I can only assume is supposed to be the Easter substitute. Oh wait, it’s the Spring Equinox. My bad. Anyway, Blaise is sitting on pins and needles as his mother will be giving birth soon, and he wants to be there for the delivery. Holly, meanwhile, reflects on how she’s going to be spending the Easter (it’s Easter, dammit!) break at Hogwarts. As usual, she’s a brat and says that she’s only staying because the Ministry, Dumbledore, and Snape won’t let her leave, because Sirius is on the loose. You know Holly, if you’d have CAUGHT PETTIGREW WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE, you wouldn’t have to put up with this! You’ll get no sympathy from me. Oh, and Holly adds that she can’t blame them, “no matter how she desperately wanted to”. Gah…
So we jump to Blaise and Holly in Charms class and we get Percy delivering a note to Blaise about how his mother has gone into labor and to come to his office and would Holly be so kind as to escort him? We also get a rip-off of the sixth book, with him adding a postscript of “I rather dislike Blood Pops”. If he doesn’t like them, why would he use that name as the password?
Now we’re at Dumbledore’s office and Dumbledore uses Floo Powder to send Blaise home for the birth of his brother. Erm, are students allowed to go home for that? Well anyway, he’s off. After he leaves, Dumbledore assures Holly that Mrs. Zabini will be fine, and I don’t care. Seriously, I have less emotion stocked in them than the Cullens. Bring back the Weasleys. They’re awesome.
Dumbledore conjures a dining table and a house elf, who lays a tea tray on the table. No idea why Dumbledore doesn’t just summon the tray himself, but whatever. Oh, and the house elf is named “Peachy”. No, I have no idea.
They start drinking tea and bashing the Ministry, as Dumbledore explains that he would have let Holly go along, but Fudge wouldn’t let her leave the castle. First of all, and I repeat, it’s Holly’s own fault she has to put up with this. There are probably a million ways she could, as of this instant, provide evidence that Sirius is innocent and Pettigrew isn’t. She could have had Pettigrew captured weeks ago. Thus, I don’t feel sorry at all about this. Second of all, let’s think about this. Fudge is essentially being bashed for trying to keep Holly alive. And this isn’t really for political reasons, it’s not like the sixth book. Fudge honestly thinks that she’s in danger and is trying to keep her safe. And he’s being mocked and ridiculed for it. I…that’s just horrible. Finally, since when has Dumbledore seriously let the Ministry order him around if he thinks what he wants to do is right?
The Fudge-bashing continues as we hear that Fudge wants Dementors in the castle itself, and yet again, why would Dumbledore even entertain that notion? Holly, meanwhile, angsts about how horrible Dementors are and how she wouldn’t be able to fight them off. Always “MEMEME!!!” with her, isn’t it? And that is, in fact, the case, because Dumbledore assures Holly that the Dementors will never be let in the school and words it like it’s all a favor for her specifically.
Dumbledore then brings up that stupid fostering thing. He says that it’s fortunate that Snape thought of it when he did, and I’m wondering why they didn’t do this sooner. I’d think that if anyone could be justified as keeping an eye on Holly’s living conditions, it’s Dumbledore. After all, the books showed twice that he knew what was going on with the Dursleys. So if that’s the case, why wouldn’t he already know they’re abusing her and have planned for this sooner? It’s not like they were being subtle!
Anyway, the entire thing about it being fortunate just paves the way for more Ministry bashing, as we’re told that “the Minister would have either placed you in Auror custody or sent someone to stay with you at your relatives' home. Perhaps even prevented you from returning to Hogwarts in September” and…I can only conclude that this is related to the whole Sirius thing, because Holly’s main concern is how, if someone from the Ministry stayed with the Dursleys, they would find out she was being abused. I…*scratches head* I don’t know why that would be so bad. Oh wait, then we get this.
“The girl felt her insides go cold, the implications sinking in. Had someone come to stay with her, they wouldn't have been able to miss the Dursleys' attitude towards her. From there, it would have been very easy to find out about their less than amicable behaviour in the past. On the other hand, being removed by the Ministry would have been just as bad, if not worse. She had no delusions that they would have let her have contact much less visits from her friends. She would have been all but locked in a cage. A gilded and elegantly decorated one but a cage nonetheless.”
ZeldaQueen: List time!
First of all, what does Holly think happens when people are taken out of the custody of abusive guardians? Does she think the Ministry will have her just wander around the building? No, THEY’LL SEND HER TO ANOTHER FAMILY, JUST LIKE THIS STUPID FOSTERING THING!!!
Second, why is she so certain that she won’t be allowed to contact anyone? Is this more of the “Ohhhh Slytherins have an undeserved bad reputation and are hated on” thing? If so, that’s stupid. Like I said, Lucius is working in the Ministry still, and has a very good standing with Fudge. Heck, he could probably convince Fudge to let him take in Holly! The Ministry would not care!
Third of all, I hate this Sue and this fic and the suethor. Just thought I’d toss that out there.
So Dumbledore mentions that he went to see the Dursleys and Holly flips her shit. No, I don’t know why that freaks her out so much, since it’s not like she’s going back. Dumbledore says that they quickly agreed to the fostering and Holly bitterly says that the probably couldn’t wait to be rid of her and once again, I ask this question, which I was saving from the sporking, earlier…
WHY THE FUCK DID THEY TAKE HER IN IN THE FIRST PLACE IF THEY HATE HER SO MUCH???
Holly decides to brush off Dumbledore at this and Dumbledore is pathetic and keeps apologizing about how he couldn’t send her off to see Blaise’s mom giving birth, even though I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t be allowed anyway.
In our next section, we find out that Blaise’s little brother was born and his name is “Xavier Avogadro Zabini”. Looks like the Stu manifested early. And how dare you sully the X-men like that? Blaise comes back the next day with photos, even though he’s from a pureblood family who supports the Old Ways and only goes on about why Muggles suck, so why he’d use a Muggle-based thing like photographs, I have no idea. All of the girls coo over the baby because girls all are like the, ya know, and Luna talks about how he is not at risk for “gaya infection”. Is it just me, or does the suethor make Luna seem…out there? I mean, even more than canon? Maybe it’s because the suethor keeps making up the stupidest stuff for her to go on about. Holly, meanwhile, angsts about how she missed the birth, even though she’s going to be living with the fucking Zabinis in a short time.
We then go to Quidditch, which cannot be summarized, mostly because the suethor has already done so.
“The Quidditch final was the last weekend in April, Gryffindor versus Slytherin. But in the end, it was really not that much of a match at all. Slytherin had won all of their games by a considerable margin so far, and it came as no surprise when they defeated the Lions by two hundred points, assuring them the cup. Her good mood wasn't even dampened when Oliver Wood called foul on the fact that she had a Firebolt and about a dozen other things in an attempt to get her thrown from the game. Madam Hooch finally just told him off and shooed him away with a threat of a detention if he kept it up. Wood grouchily stomped away, and the Weasley twins later told her that he was seen sporting a set of antlers in the Common Room, which they assuredly had nothing to do with at all. Nor was it their fault that Wood sudden felt the urge to proclaim the Serpents' many virtues any time a Slytherin came near him.”
ZeldaQueen: Don’t you just love the suethor’s attention to detail? Also…
OLIVER WOOD WAS NOT A PETULANT SORE LOSER! STOP SPITTING ON HIS CHARACTER! AND NO MATTER HOW SILLY THEY THOUGHT HIS STRATEGIES WERE, FRED AND GEORGE STOOD UP AND SUPPORTED HIM! I HATE YOU! STOP TAKING THE WEASLEYS AND FORCING THEM TO HATE ON THEIR FRIENDS JUST TO SUPPORT YOUR MARY SUE!!!
On another note, the arrogance is overwhelming. Oh, but of course the Slytherins won! The Gryffindors suck and never had a chance! And the Slytherins' "many" virtues? I hate you, suethor.
And…now we’re in May. The fuck? When did we get here? Well, whatever! It’s almost exams time, and because Holly’s noncanon teachers, Professors Rosetta and Vector, are so Mary Sue great, they’re the first to bring up studying for finals. Trelawny and Hagrid are appropriately pissed on by being singled out as the only teachers who have not yet set exams. Trelawny is apparently too busy predicting Holly’s death and I really think the suethor is stretching that bit of characterization to a breaking point. Hagrid’s reason is that he’s upset about Buckbeak, who’s been slated for execution. The suethor drops that last point in the most un-emphasized and casual ways I’ve ever seen.
“The latter was preoccupied with Buckbeak, who was now set to die. Hagrid along with Ron and Hermione were researching for the appeal, but things did not look good, according to Neville. Holly felt a thread of remorse at hearing that and quietly promised to visit the man in the future to cheer him up”
ZeldaQueen: This is all of the foreshadowing we’ve had since… *goes to check* last chapter, in which we got our usual "Hermione was researching defenses for Buckbeak and Hagrid was a weepy baby" updates. I don't think we were even told that Buckbeak had his trial and lost the appeal. This is really frightening. She knows that Buckbeak is going to die. She keeps going on about how she sympathizes with those who are picked on and bullied and abused like she was. She knows that Buckbeak is not dangerous and was provoked. She knows that Lucius Malfoy, who she is buddy-buddy with and who will certainly listen to, is the person who pushed this forward. Oh yeah, that’s a point that the suethor keeps ignoring - we’ve had exactly one mention thus far that Lucius was involved with the order for Buckbeak’s execution. And even then, it was hidden in the suethor reminding us that there were other people demanding it, including Neville’s grandmother.
And we see that Ron and Hermione are spending all of their very limited spare time trying to save Buckbeak, all while they’re at odds over the Scabbers thing. And Holly isn’t doing a damned thing, despite going on about how she’s perfectly fine with abusing the Time Turner to do whatever she likes.
And to cap it all off, we get Holly crying crocodile tears over this all. She feels “a thread of remorse” that an innocent animal will be dying, even though she is tight with the right people and has the time to find evidence and probably would be a million times better with more resources than Harry to save Buckbeak.
I repeat. WHY AM I SUPPOSED TO LIKE HER MORE???
Oh, but forget about that! We’ve got to angst about Holly and how Remus is too busy for her anti-Dementor classes and how she can’t spend enough time with Tom and Sirius and how she feels so god dammed guilty that she hasn’t been talking to her sociopath boyfriend, even though she can’t care less that an intelligent and beloved pet is going to be killed.
Oh, and she thinks that Sirius is “obsessed” with finding Pettigrew and angsts about how he needs to meet with Lupin, but there just isn’t time for her to explain to Lupin about how Sirius is innocent. I…BY GOD, THIS IS STUPID!
On a totally pointless note, the group is traipsing around in that stupid secret passageway they found in the last story arc, since clearly it’s not like there’s other stuff they could be doing, and find that one of the tunnels leads back to the Chamber of Secrets. Which means that they had it well within their power to stop the Basilisk long before Ginny was kidnapped or other people were attacked and they just ignored it. They, of course, treat it like a merry discovery and ignore those implications.
We jump ahead to finals, with Holly “breez[ing]” through them and laughing at Hermione for having a nervous breakdown in Lupin’s test, over her McGonagall boggart. Bitch. Oh, and she only notes several strange adults hanging around the front of the castle and somehow misses that one of them is Fudge and another is a fucking executioner. I’m starting to think that she’s deliberately ignoring this stuff because she doesn’t want to be bothered faking sorrow over it. Holly still gets a note from Hagrid, informing her about how Buckbeak is getting the Queen of Hearts treatment. She decides to visit him, as it’s “the least she could do”. I’m sure that if canon didn’t call for it to be important to the plot, she wouldn’t even do that much.
Onward to Divination finals, and this is what we get.
“Holly didn't even bother to bluff her way through, knowing that the woman wouldn't believe her unless she said something tragic. She settled for claiming that Buckbeak would be sentenced to die but would miraculously escape, possibly mauling several people on his way out. Trelawney lapped it up eagerly, giving her top marks”
ZeldaQueen: List time!
First of all, you made it up. Thus, you did bluff, you rotten, little liar. At least Harry tried to see what was going on.
Second of all, way to completely miss the fridge brilliance of Harry’s prediction - that he stuck with what really would happen (Buckbeak would be fine and fly away) rather than what seemed likely (that Buckbeak would be killed). Instead, Holly views the entire thing as a joke. Which brings us to…
Third of all, Holly has been frighteningly dismissive of Buckbeak’s impending death and outright rude towards Hagrid’s sadness and despair over it. Am I the only one who sees what incredibly bad taste her joke prediction is? Especially since she could have done anything in the world. Harry only picked Buckbeak because he honestly was upset about the execution and it was what was on his mind.
Fourth of all, why would Trelawny lap that up? Buckbeak survives in it. Wouldn’t she have only been pleased if he had a bloody death?
So yeah, Holly finishes the exam and tries her damnedest not to laugh at Trelawny, because her trick was just so funny of course, when we get the prediction. This freaks out Holly, who goes running back to tell Sirius about it. She arrives just in time to see him, Blaise, and Malfoy looking at the Marauders’ Map. Peter Pettigrew is in Hagid’s Hut and…why? If he left the grounds, why the fuck would he come back? What the hell is this, I don’t even…GAH!
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AN: Yes, I gave Blaise's little brother a very bizarre name, but then, everyone in his family has an odd one. I named him after both a famous professor and a scientist to go with the intellectual theme of Blaise and Dante.
ZeldaQueen: X-MEN DON’T COUNT!
On a more serious note, why would the pureblood, Old Name Zabinis name their son after famous Muggle people?
Also, I am finally finished with college! Hooray! I now just have to finish grad school. Not-so-hooray!
ZeldaQueen: I still can’t believe you’re a college senior. It’s people like you and Stephenie Meyer who are lowering the literary bar
And I've already started on the next chapter. I am trying to finish it before my sister and I leave for our week in the Bahamas at in the middle of May.
ZeldaQueen: Shoot me
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Onward to: Chapter 37: Cave Canem
Back to: Chapter 35: C'est la Vie
Return to: Table of Contents
Projection Room Voices: Starting Media in 3...2...1...
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Chapter 36: Solitary Serenade
Alright, so we start off with a flashback/recap of the cliffhanger of the last chapter. I honestly fail to see the point of any cliffhangers in this thing. They’re less threatening than those of a Goosebumps book (apologies to Goosebumps, don’t mean to insult the series). So yeah. As we all expect, this leads the way to Snape going on about how poor little Holly is an abused kitten, sucks for her. Holly, of course, spends this entire conversation dragging her feet and acting sick and once again, I can not understand at all why she’s so upset. Like I said, she doesn’t seem the least bit ashamed of the abuse or embarrassed that her problems are being handled by someone else or something believable like that. As for Snape, I’m divided. On one hand, I find it unbelievably grating that he (along with EVERY OTHER GODDAMMED CHARACTER) is centering his life around the angst of this little bitch, who has done pretty much nothing to deserve this much attention. Seriously, Harry Potter did more than her and he didn’t get this much fucking scrutiny in his life. On the other hand though, we do get glimpses of Snape actually calling Holly out on being a dolt, so yeah.
Anyway, this entire thing is just painful and boring and stupid and banal and if I must suffer, so must you I know you’d hate to miss it, so here we go!
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"Do you have anything you wish to say, Miss Potter?" he inquired, voice holding a peculiar note.
ZeldaQueen: (Snape) “Anything along the lines of ‘I am an irredeemable Mary Sue’?”
"No, nothing I wish to say, sir," she replied without even opening her eyes.
ZeldaQueen: Wow, what a bitch. This guy is going out of character just to see that she’s alright and she isn’t cooperating in the slightest. Anyway, doesn’t she complain elsewhere that NOBODY CARES ABOUT HER SUFFERING, yet here we have people caring and she’s complaining.
BITCH, MAKE UP YOUR MIND!
The Potions master made an odd sound, half-way between a snort and a growl. "Perhaps I should rephrase then, Miss Potter. I will speak, and you will listen."
ZeldaQueen: Go Snape! Curse her tits off!
He crossed his arms over his chest. "Several Prefects approached me with concerns about your home life, as did an Auror, Mr. Shacklebolt. I believe you know his niece Titania."
ZeldaQueen: Yet again, why the fuck are so many people focusing their lives around this one problem? Also, if the Ministry and Dumbledore are nosing into her business as much as we’ve been led to believe, why haven’t they noticed it before this? Why…just why? I hate this fic
Holly's eyelids slid open, and she looked at him carefully. She fought the urge to shift in her seat, doing her utmost to formulate a response. However, she was apparently taking too long as her teacher continued.
ZeldaQueen: This exposition is taking too long! Get on with it!
"Auror Shacklebolt has graciously agreed to let me deal with this matter," he stated, tone suggesting just how ungracious the other man had been.
ZeldaQueen: Really? I never could have figured that out!
"If I do not, he most assuredly will. Something I cannot allow since it will inevitably enter the Ministry into the equation."
ZeldaQueen: Okay, what’s up with the Ministry here? On one hand, we’re told that they’re Evil Folks who will somehow slander and persecute Holly and won’t give her a moment’s peace and force her to live with the Dursleys. Now we’re told that since they’re aware of her abusive homelife, they’re all gung-ho to take steps to deal with the situation. This is…somehow treated as a bad thing? What? I’m so confused!
He let her stew for moment.
ZeldaQueen: He then stirred, added a few spices, and offered the remains to Mrs. Lovette. It was their understanding the Sue Pies were sickeningly sweet, but good for an occasional guilty pleasure
"Now, as to the matter at hand," the man went on smoothly, "your relatives care leaves much to be desired. It does not take a genius to see you're undernourished and underweight. Far too small for your age.
ZeldaQueen: And no one noticed this before now? It’s all she goes on about!
Holly scowled at that, but he simply ignored her.
ZeldaQueen: Okay, what the hell? He’s pointing out that she’s underweight, something which seems to hardly be her fault, and she gets pissed? What’s up with that?
"I am also aware of past complaints filed by your primary school, suspicions of neglect. Strangely, there never seemed to be any follow-up by the Muggle authorities. Perhaps Vernon Dursley's connections at work," Professor Snape mused.
ZeldaQueen: Yes, because we all know that drill companies are so influential in regards to the media and police. Look suethor, the fact that Vernon’s job was so boring and pointless was a joke in the book! It was meant to show how boring and pointless and superficial the family was! Shut up!
"That does not even cover the incident last August with that… woman. This all seems to suggest some form of abuse."
ZeldaQueen: *tiredly* “Suggest”. Right, with all the flinching and angsting and…let’s just leave it at that
The girl opened her mouth but was cut off.
ZeldaQueen: “Did I ever tell you how I got these scars?” the Joker casually asked, as the Sue writhed in pain
"Do not deny it, Miss Potter," he inserted tersely.
ZeldaQueen: I don’t think “inserted” is the verb you’re looking for
Her Head of House regarded her for a moment, face shrewd and calculating.
ZeldaQueen: (Snape) “Now I only have to hold out for a few more seconds, before that poisoned spork I got from Balthazar is ready”
"By this stage it does not matter.
ZeldaQueen: (Snape) “You are a Sue and the sporkers are calling for your sparkly head on a platter”
It will be very easy to gather all the evidence I need, and regardless, you will be removed from their care."
ZeldaQueen: (Snape) “And then, you will be shoved down the Pit of Sues, where there is no escape. Why am I talking like this again?”
"Professor?" Holly nearly jumped to her feet. "How? Won't that involve the Ministry? I have to go back!"
ZeldaQueen: (Sue) “How will I angst otherwise?”
Seriously, how stupid is she? Doesn’t she go on about how smart Dumbledore and Snape and her teachers are? Doesn’t she think they’ve figured this out already?
"You do not," the Potions master insisted rather firmly.
ZeldaQueen: (Snape) “Into the Pit you go! Please give my regards to Rose Potter and Ariana Black”
"And there are ways around the Ministry."
ZeldaQueen: Sideways, backways, top ways, and roundabout
This time, Holly did rise.
ZeldaQueen: What, is she ascending to a higher plane of existence or something?
And now standing, her nose was sadly only chest-level. She craned her head to stare directly in his eyes, expression grim but defiant.
ZeldaQueen: Snape promptly shoved her back into her seat. “Do not even dream of intimidating me, you silly girl,” he snarled. “I have lost the love of my life, watched the deaths of countless innocents, stole secrets from under Voldemort’s flat nose, fought off thousands of Sues, and been hit on by a blind idiot. If you ever try to act threatening towards me again, I will stab out your pretty little eyes with a spork and leave you for the HMS STFU to do with as they please”
"But I have to return! What about the… erm…" She hesitated, not certain how much he knew about the blood protections.
ZeldaQueen: ‘Cause you know, Snape’s stupid and certainly isn’t privy to stuff like that, and definitely can’t figure it out on his own like she could. How the fuck did she even figure it out, again?
The very reason she had to stay with the Dursleys.
ZeldaQueen: Angst
"I know about the blood wards, you foolish girl," Snape put in heatedly, looking for all the world like he wanted nothing more to grab her by the shoulders and shake sense into her.
ZeldaQueen: *very heartened* Do it Snape! Do it now! I’ll help!
He settled for towering over her, even if the effect was somewhat unintentional.
ZeldaQueen: Unintentional? Hardly
"Do you honestly believe the headmaster will allow you to remain there? Did you not for a moment stop to think that the protections work properly or even at all given their behaviour towards you?"
ZeldaQueen: Okay…well that sort of makes sense. The blood magic was just as reliant on Petunia’s love for Harry and Lily. Although I have two questions. The first I shall ask in a bit. The second, why the fuck didn’t Dumbledore realize this sooner??? He’s been keeping tabs on Holly, hasn’t he? Why wouldn’t he notice before this, “Oh that’s not working and she’s being abused, better try something else”.
IDIOTS! ALL OF THEM! HURRY SNAPE, ESCAPE WHILE YOU’RE REMOTELY CANON!!!
Holly blinked. "Well… I… that is to say… it had possibly occurred to me." She shifted her weight helplessly, head dropping. "I know that I can't go back there, Professor, but I still need that protection."
ZeldaQueen: He just said the blood protection doesn’t work! My God, this bint is stupid!!!
He fought to keep his hands from inching forward.
ZeldaQueen: Yes! Strangle her! Please!
"The blood wards do not work at all, idiot child! They no longer exist!" he practically shouted but somehow restrained himself.
ZeldaQueen: Don’t restrain yourself! Scream away! You’re right, she’s an idiot!
"Whatever protection existed has now dissolved completely. It is gone."
"Then… but… what am I supposed to do now?" she asked, doing her best to not tremble.
ZeldaQueen: (Sue) “Curses! He’s starting to free himself from my spell! I’d best act like a wounded gazelle, to garner sympathy!”
"I don't..." The girl swallowed thickly as she tried to fight the sudden lump in her throat.
She shook her head, mind a jumble of information that she was desperately trying to sort.
ZeldaQueen: Given what we’ve seen of her intelligence, that sorting shouldn’t last too long
Holly had only stayed with the Dursleys this long because of the blood wards.
ZeldaQueen: *holds head in hands* Once again, how long has she known about the blood wards? And why not run away before then?
She needed it to protect her from Voldemort, when and not if he returned. But if what her professor said was true, then it hadn't meant anything. All this time she had put up with them had done her no good. It was worthless, completely worthless. It had all been for nothing. Nothing at all.
ZeldaQueen: Translation - BLAHHHHH, WANGSTWANGSTWANGSTWANGSTWANGST!!!! POOR ME, I SUFFERED ABUSE! IT WAS ALL FOR NOTHING! IT’S NOT LIKE I EVER TRIED TO IMPROVE THE SITUATION OR ANYTHING AND IT’S NOT LIKE PEOPLE ARE WORKING NOW TO FIX THE QUALITY OF MY LIVING! OH WOE IS ME, DAMMIT!
Maker, she was such an idiot.
ZeldaQueen: Yes, yes she is. And am I the only one who sees her go on about “Maker” and imagines her cursing at those items from the Harvest Moon series?
She should have realised sooner. Blaise had been right all along, but her best friend wasn't here at the moment. He couldn't help her through this. She was on her own, something Holly should be rather used to because of the Dursleys.
ZeldaQueen: THEN WHY IS SHE ANGSTING ABOUT IT? For all she goes on about how she’s used to being alone and betrayed and hated on, she sure does bitch and moan when it happens to her!
And how everything came back to them. To that family. But not her family. She was just a relative. An inconvenient and unwanted addition. A heavy and bothersome burden they couldn't wait to get rid of, to throw away with the rest of the rubbish.
ZeldaQueen: Hold on, I just know the world’s smallest violin is around here, somewhere
Holly's hands shook as she clenched them into fists. There was a burning behind her eyes and in her throat. The girl felt the sudden urge to cry in that instant, to let her tears run free and never stop. And even years later she wasn't entirely sure why she didn't. Maybe she was simply too shell-shocked for it. Or perhaps it was what her Head of House did next.
ZeldaQueen: He put on a skirt and danced the hula
He placed his hands on her shoulders and very gently lowered her back into her seat. A bottle was pressed to her lips, and she drank automatically, instantly fleeing a tingling calm spread throughout her body.
ZeldaQueen: Yes! He poisoned her! GO SNAPE!!!
Holly shook her head again to clear her thoughts, vaguely hearing him give a sigh and the scrap of another chair across the floor as he sat down in front of her. She blinked, only to see his dark eyes gazing back at her.
Snape spoke after a moment. "I have made arrangements.
ZeldaQueen: - of flowers. Turns out the Potion’s master has a talent for that sort of thing
You will not be going back, Miss Potter. I can assure you of that." He said the last softly, normal sneer gone from his voice.
ZeldaQueen: Goodbye, vaguely cannon Snape. You shall be missed.
"Mr. Zabini is most insistent that you simply stay with him for the foreseeable future. I am inclined to agree." He allowed that to sink in for a minute. "And that is why I approached Erendiria Zabini on this matter. She was most eager to foster you until you come of age."
ZeldaQueen: I think the suethor missed the entire point of the Dumbledore’s explanation about why Harry didn’t get a foster family. Whatever
Despite the Calming draught, Holly's eyebrows rose nearly even with her hairline.
ZeldaQueen: Either she’s got one hell of a high set of eyebrows or really stretchy skin
"Sir?"
He seemed mildly amused at her confusion but thankfully explained, "Fostering is a long and established tradition in our world, most especially for Muggleborns.
ZeldadQueen: And Muggles. Muggles have foster families too!
It has fallen out of favour in the last century or so, given the increase in anti-Muggle sentiment. However, it is still practiced." The man smirked, obviously very pleased with himself.
ZeldaQueen: Is he secretly planning on sending her into the foster care of a chimera or something? *is hopeful*
"Fostering?" Holly repeated, synapses sluggish as she tried to wrap her brain around such a novel concept. "What does that actually mean?"
ZeldaQueen: “Such a novel concept”?!? YOU IDIOT, HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW ABOUT THIS? AREN’T YOU SUPPOSED TO BE WELL-READ???
"A fostering is in many ways similar to an apprenticeship, though they are most assuredly not the same thing." He paused, taking in her still confused expression, and sighed again.
ZeldaQueen: What? How on Earth would she possibly be confused by the explanation “It’s the same as, but different from”? [/sarcasm]
"Think of it as a temporary adoption, one where a child goes to live with a Wizarding family for a space of time. This is how Muggleborns were once introduced to our world, how they learned its intricacies and customs."
ZeldaQueen: There’s more shit in that explanation than in the Agean stables
She nodded slowly, sitting back in her seat. "I think that I understand, but won't people find this odd? I mean," Holly clarified, "we're doing this to keep the Ministry from becoming involved, but won't this make them suspicious?"
ZeldaQueen: Why would the Ministry care? The Ministry didn’t give two figs about Harry’s life until the fifth book onward. And even then, it was only because he was causing them trouble
The Potions master considered her question with an appraising air. "In centuries past, it was a great honour to foster children; many still consider it to be. And given that it is common knowledge you live with Muggles, no one will think twice of a Wizarding family wanting to foster you."
ZeldaQueen: STOP SUEING THIS UP! IT’S A COMMON CONCEPT!!!
He added with a hint of what she thought was disdain, "You have actually received numerous offers in the past, though Dumbledore as your intermediary dealt with those."
She tilted her head at that but let it by without comment.
ZeldaQueen: Yes, time to bash Dumbledore. Pay no heed to the fact that the suethor was merely copying his canon self, which actually had reasonable motivations for his actions
"Nevertheless," Professor Snape continued, "this is a perfect excuse. It effectively removes you from your relatives' custody without needing to involve the Ministry. It will be as though you are a member of the Zabini family. Legally and magically, you will be their responsibility until the fostering ends or you come of age. For all intents and purposes, they will be your guardians. They will have the final say in all that you do."
ZeldaQueen: That’s going to make the ceaseless flirting between herself and Blaise mighty awkward
Holly swallowed hard.
ZeldaQueen: That’s what she said
A family, even a foster one, sounded wonderful. And the Zabinis were very fond of her already. Perhaps this could really work.
ZeldaQueen: That’s right, all that angsting for nothing. God, this fic sucks!
"And… and the Dursleys?" she asked with a false lightness. "What will happen to them?"
ZeldaQueen: They’ll probably be tortured by Tom Riddle Jr., Malfoy, Blaise, and Holly
"I am aware that prosecution is out of the question at this present time, but we will most assuredly deal with your relatives at some point in the future." His dark eyes glittered malevolently in the faint light, a promise of retribution. "There are ways other than the Ministry to enact justice."
ZeldaQueen: Yep, looks like I’m pretty much right
Holly wisely decided not to ask, instead casting her mind for another topic.
ZeldaQueen: Yes Holly, just ignore the unpleasant implications of that
"The fostering… when will it take effect? I assume that you still need the Dursleys' permission for it in the first place, but I don't think that will be a problem. They're eager to be rid of me."
ZeldaQueen: As evidenced by the fact that they took her in and cared for her for thirteen years…what.
"Quite likely," Snape responded, sneer evident on his lips.
ZeldaQueen: STOP SNEERING!!!
"Lady Zabini and I will be visiting your relatives later this month or possibly in May, after she has recovered from the birth of her child. You need not even be present when the agreement is signed."
"What about Professor Dumbledore?" Holly questioned as something occurred to her. "What are you going to tell him?"
ZeldaQueen: I really don’t get what’s up with Dumbledore here. Why would he care? He only sent Harry to live with the Dursleys because of the blood protection. If he is told it doesn’t work, why would he mind if Holly’s sent to live with someone else?
"I do not need his permission to arrange a fostering for a student in my own House," the man inserted with a faintly snide tone. "As for the true reason for your leaving… the headmaster already knows. I informed him myself just a few days ago. He also agreed to let me settle this matter."
ZeldaQueen: So…what’s the conflict here, again?
The girl's heart thumped in her chest. "He already knows? And Re-Professor Lupin?"
"Lupin is undoubtedly aware of your situation as well."
ZeldaQueen: Why does Lupin matter?
"I see," she commented, inner calm fading as her insides squirmed.
Thankfully, the professor didn't say anything else, and they sat in silence for a several minutes. The Potions master was unreadable behind his usual mask. Holly, on the other hand, was too deep in thought to care what she looked like.
ZeldaQueen: GET ON WITH IT!
"I believe that covers everything," Professor Snape finally said as he rose to his feet. "I will meet with you again once the fostering is formally arranged, Miss Potter."
ZeldaQueen: Right. I formally propose we organize a manhunt for the conflict of this series. It’ll be fun! Just like searching for Mel’s Hole or the Chimera House.
Holly likewise stood, studying him as he moved to the door. Her eyes narrowed as she considered how smoothly he had dealt with the entire matter. It was all too easy for this to have been the first time.
ZeldaQueen: That’s because the suethor was organizing it all
"You've done this before, haven't you?" the girl realised in burst of clarity. "Set up a fostering to get a student away from their family.
ZeldaQueen: I swear, if it turns out that it’s Tom Riddle…
Snape stiffened. "Yes, I have," he acknowledged softly, releasing the spells on his door. "And I will most likely do it again in the future."
ZeldaQueen: SNAPE IS NOT A WOOBIE! HE WOULDN’T CARE!
Holly didn't know what to say to that, quietly standing for a few heartbeats before looking at him again. "Thank you, Professor," she said, trying her best to convene her complete sincerity.
ZeldaQueen: Shouldn’t be too hard. The Sue’s sincerity is about as deep as a tablespoon
He inclined my head. "I could hardly allow one of my charges to come to harm. Further, Kingsley Shacklebolt would mount my head on his wall for anything less."
ZeldaQueen: Ha ha! Isn’t Kingsley in charge of finding Sirius? Why would he stick his nose into this so much?
Holly somehow managed not to snigger.
ZeldaQueen: Yes, because that’s so funny. *rolls eyes*
She instead nodded and quickly left, feeling his eyes on her as she walked out the door and down the hallway.
ZeldaQueen: Snape’s death trap went off right on schedule and Holly’s head splattered against the wall. “Now, perhaps, my students can regrow their spines,” Snape muttered. “I must get Filch to clean up this mess”
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So yeah. After all of that, we get a scene change and a time jump. We’re now told that it’s “Ostara”, which I can only assume is supposed to be the Easter substitute. Oh wait, it’s the Spring Equinox. My bad. Anyway, Blaise is sitting on pins and needles as his mother will be giving birth soon, and he wants to be there for the delivery. Holly, meanwhile, reflects on how she’s going to be spending the Easter (it’s Easter, dammit!) break at Hogwarts. As usual, she’s a brat and says that she’s only staying because the Ministry, Dumbledore, and Snape won’t let her leave, because Sirius is on the loose. You know Holly, if you’d have CAUGHT PETTIGREW WHEN YOU HAD THE CHANCE, you wouldn’t have to put up with this! You’ll get no sympathy from me. Oh, and Holly adds that she can’t blame them, “no matter how she desperately wanted to”. Gah…
So we jump to Blaise and Holly in Charms class and we get Percy delivering a note to Blaise about how his mother has gone into labor and to come to his office and would Holly be so kind as to escort him? We also get a rip-off of the sixth book, with him adding a postscript of “I rather dislike Blood Pops”. If he doesn’t like them, why would he use that name as the password?
Now we’re at Dumbledore’s office and Dumbledore uses Floo Powder to send Blaise home for the birth of his brother. Erm, are students allowed to go home for that? Well anyway, he’s off. After he leaves, Dumbledore assures Holly that Mrs. Zabini will be fine, and I don’t care. Seriously, I have less emotion stocked in them than the Cullens. Bring back the Weasleys. They’re awesome.
Dumbledore conjures a dining table and a house elf, who lays a tea tray on the table. No idea why Dumbledore doesn’t just summon the tray himself, but whatever. Oh, and the house elf is named “Peachy”. No, I have no idea.
They start drinking tea and bashing the Ministry, as Dumbledore explains that he would have let Holly go along, but Fudge wouldn’t let her leave the castle. First of all, and I repeat, it’s Holly’s own fault she has to put up with this. There are probably a million ways she could, as of this instant, provide evidence that Sirius is innocent and Pettigrew isn’t. She could have had Pettigrew captured weeks ago. Thus, I don’t feel sorry at all about this. Second of all, let’s think about this. Fudge is essentially being bashed for trying to keep Holly alive. And this isn’t really for political reasons, it’s not like the sixth book. Fudge honestly thinks that she’s in danger and is trying to keep her safe. And he’s being mocked and ridiculed for it. I…that’s just horrible. Finally, since when has Dumbledore seriously let the Ministry order him around if he thinks what he wants to do is right?
The Fudge-bashing continues as we hear that Fudge wants Dementors in the castle itself, and yet again, why would Dumbledore even entertain that notion? Holly, meanwhile, angsts about how horrible Dementors are and how she wouldn’t be able to fight them off. Always “MEMEME!!!” with her, isn’t it? And that is, in fact, the case, because Dumbledore assures Holly that the Dementors will never be let in the school and words it like it’s all a favor for her specifically.
Dumbledore then brings up that stupid fostering thing. He says that it’s fortunate that Snape thought of it when he did, and I’m wondering why they didn’t do this sooner. I’d think that if anyone could be justified as keeping an eye on Holly’s living conditions, it’s Dumbledore. After all, the books showed twice that he knew what was going on with the Dursleys. So if that’s the case, why wouldn’t he already know they’re abusing her and have planned for this sooner? It’s not like they were being subtle!
Anyway, the entire thing about it being fortunate just paves the way for more Ministry bashing, as we’re told that “the Minister would have either placed you in Auror custody or sent someone to stay with you at your relatives' home. Perhaps even prevented you from returning to Hogwarts in September” and…I can only conclude that this is related to the whole Sirius thing, because Holly’s main concern is how, if someone from the Ministry stayed with the Dursleys, they would find out she was being abused. I…*scratches head* I don’t know why that would be so bad. Oh wait, then we get this.
“The girl felt her insides go cold, the implications sinking in. Had someone come to stay with her, they wouldn't have been able to miss the Dursleys' attitude towards her. From there, it would have been very easy to find out about their less than amicable behaviour in the past. On the other hand, being removed by the Ministry would have been just as bad, if not worse. She had no delusions that they would have let her have contact much less visits from her friends. She would have been all but locked in a cage. A gilded and elegantly decorated one but a cage nonetheless.”
ZeldaQueen: List time!
First of all, what does Holly think happens when people are taken out of the custody of abusive guardians? Does she think the Ministry will have her just wander around the building? No, THEY’LL SEND HER TO ANOTHER FAMILY, JUST LIKE THIS STUPID FOSTERING THING!!!
Second, why is she so certain that she won’t be allowed to contact anyone? Is this more of the “Ohhhh Slytherins have an undeserved bad reputation and are hated on” thing? If so, that’s stupid. Like I said, Lucius is working in the Ministry still, and has a very good standing with Fudge. Heck, he could probably convince Fudge to let him take in Holly! The Ministry would not care!
Third of all, I hate this Sue and this fic and the suethor. Just thought I’d toss that out there.
So Dumbledore mentions that he went to see the Dursleys and Holly flips her shit. No, I don’t know why that freaks her out so much, since it’s not like she’s going back. Dumbledore says that they quickly agreed to the fostering and Holly bitterly says that the probably couldn’t wait to be rid of her and once again, I ask this question, which I was saving from the sporking, earlier…
WHY THE FUCK DID THEY TAKE HER IN IN THE FIRST PLACE IF THEY HATE HER SO MUCH???
Holly decides to brush off Dumbledore at this and Dumbledore is pathetic and keeps apologizing about how he couldn’t send her off to see Blaise’s mom giving birth, even though I’m pretty sure she wouldn’t be allowed anyway.
In our next section, we find out that Blaise’s little brother was born and his name is “Xavier Avogadro Zabini”. Looks like the Stu manifested early. And how dare you sully the X-men like that? Blaise comes back the next day with photos, even though he’s from a pureblood family who supports the Old Ways and only goes on about why Muggles suck, so why he’d use a Muggle-based thing like photographs, I have no idea. All of the girls coo over the baby because girls all are like the, ya know, and Luna talks about how he is not at risk for “gaya infection”. Is it just me, or does the suethor make Luna seem…out there? I mean, even more than canon? Maybe it’s because the suethor keeps making up the stupidest stuff for her to go on about. Holly, meanwhile, angsts about how she missed the birth, even though she’s going to be living with the fucking Zabinis in a short time.
We then go to Quidditch, which cannot be summarized, mostly because the suethor has already done so.
“The Quidditch final was the last weekend in April, Gryffindor versus Slytherin. But in the end, it was really not that much of a match at all. Slytherin had won all of their games by a considerable margin so far, and it came as no surprise when they defeated the Lions by two hundred points, assuring them the cup. Her good mood wasn't even dampened when Oliver Wood called foul on the fact that she had a Firebolt and about a dozen other things in an attempt to get her thrown from the game. Madam Hooch finally just told him off and shooed him away with a threat of a detention if he kept it up. Wood grouchily stomped away, and the Weasley twins later told her that he was seen sporting a set of antlers in the Common Room, which they assuredly had nothing to do with at all. Nor was it their fault that Wood sudden felt the urge to proclaim the Serpents' many virtues any time a Slytherin came near him.”
ZeldaQueen: Don’t you just love the suethor’s attention to detail? Also…
OLIVER WOOD WAS NOT A PETULANT SORE LOSER! STOP SPITTING ON HIS CHARACTER! AND NO MATTER HOW SILLY THEY THOUGHT HIS STRATEGIES WERE, FRED AND GEORGE STOOD UP AND SUPPORTED HIM! I HATE YOU! STOP TAKING THE WEASLEYS AND FORCING THEM TO HATE ON THEIR FRIENDS JUST TO SUPPORT YOUR MARY SUE!!!
On another note, the arrogance is overwhelming. Oh, but of course the Slytherins won! The Gryffindors suck and never had a chance! And the Slytherins' "many" virtues? I hate you, suethor.
And…now we’re in May. The fuck? When did we get here? Well, whatever! It’s almost exams time, and because Holly’s noncanon teachers, Professors Rosetta and Vector, are so Mary Sue great, they’re the first to bring up studying for finals. Trelawny and Hagrid are appropriately pissed on by being singled out as the only teachers who have not yet set exams. Trelawny is apparently too busy predicting Holly’s death and I really think the suethor is stretching that bit of characterization to a breaking point. Hagrid’s reason is that he’s upset about Buckbeak, who’s been slated for execution. The suethor drops that last point in the most un-emphasized and casual ways I’ve ever seen.
“The latter was preoccupied with Buckbeak, who was now set to die. Hagrid along with Ron and Hermione were researching for the appeal, but things did not look good, according to Neville. Holly felt a thread of remorse at hearing that and quietly promised to visit the man in the future to cheer him up”
ZeldaQueen: This is all of the foreshadowing we’ve had since… *goes to check* last chapter, in which we got our usual "Hermione was researching defenses for Buckbeak and Hagrid was a weepy baby" updates. I don't think we were even told that Buckbeak had his trial and lost the appeal. This is really frightening. She knows that Buckbeak is going to die. She keeps going on about how she sympathizes with those who are picked on and bullied and abused like she was. She knows that Buckbeak is not dangerous and was provoked. She knows that Lucius Malfoy, who she is buddy-buddy with and who will certainly listen to, is the person who pushed this forward. Oh yeah, that’s a point that the suethor keeps ignoring - we’ve had exactly one mention thus far that Lucius was involved with the order for Buckbeak’s execution. And even then, it was hidden in the suethor reminding us that there were other people demanding it, including Neville’s grandmother.
And we see that Ron and Hermione are spending all of their very limited spare time trying to save Buckbeak, all while they’re at odds over the Scabbers thing. And Holly isn’t doing a damned thing, despite going on about how she’s perfectly fine with abusing the Time Turner to do whatever she likes.
And to cap it all off, we get Holly crying crocodile tears over this all. She feels “a thread of remorse” that an innocent animal will be dying, even though she is tight with the right people and has the time to find evidence and probably would be a million times better with more resources than Harry to save Buckbeak.
I repeat. WHY AM I SUPPOSED TO LIKE HER MORE???
Oh, but forget about that! We’ve got to angst about Holly and how Remus is too busy for her anti-Dementor classes and how she can’t spend enough time with Tom and Sirius and how she feels so god dammed guilty that she hasn’t been talking to her sociopath boyfriend, even though she can’t care less that an intelligent and beloved pet is going to be killed.
Oh, and she thinks that Sirius is “obsessed” with finding Pettigrew and angsts about how he needs to meet with Lupin, but there just isn’t time for her to explain to Lupin about how Sirius is innocent. I…BY GOD, THIS IS STUPID!
On a totally pointless note, the group is traipsing around in that stupid secret passageway they found in the last story arc, since clearly it’s not like there’s other stuff they could be doing, and find that one of the tunnels leads back to the Chamber of Secrets. Which means that they had it well within their power to stop the Basilisk long before Ginny was kidnapped or other people were attacked and they just ignored it. They, of course, treat it like a merry discovery and ignore those implications.
We jump ahead to finals, with Holly “breez[ing]” through them and laughing at Hermione for having a nervous breakdown in Lupin’s test, over her McGonagall boggart. Bitch. Oh, and she only notes several strange adults hanging around the front of the castle and somehow misses that one of them is Fudge and another is a fucking executioner. I’m starting to think that she’s deliberately ignoring this stuff because she doesn’t want to be bothered faking sorrow over it. Holly still gets a note from Hagrid, informing her about how Buckbeak is getting the Queen of Hearts treatment. She decides to visit him, as it’s “the least she could do”. I’m sure that if canon didn’t call for it to be important to the plot, she wouldn’t even do that much.
Onward to Divination finals, and this is what we get.
“Holly didn't even bother to bluff her way through, knowing that the woman wouldn't believe her unless she said something tragic. She settled for claiming that Buckbeak would be sentenced to die but would miraculously escape, possibly mauling several people on his way out. Trelawney lapped it up eagerly, giving her top marks”
ZeldaQueen: List time!
First of all, you made it up. Thus, you did bluff, you rotten, little liar. At least Harry tried to see what was going on.
Second of all, way to completely miss the fridge brilliance of Harry’s prediction - that he stuck with what really would happen (Buckbeak would be fine and fly away) rather than what seemed likely (that Buckbeak would be killed). Instead, Holly views the entire thing as a joke. Which brings us to…
Third of all, Holly has been frighteningly dismissive of Buckbeak’s impending death and outright rude towards Hagrid’s sadness and despair over it. Am I the only one who sees what incredibly bad taste her joke prediction is? Especially since she could have done anything in the world. Harry only picked Buckbeak because he honestly was upset about the execution and it was what was on his mind.
Fourth of all, why would Trelawny lap that up? Buckbeak survives in it. Wouldn’t she have only been pleased if he had a bloody death?
So yeah, Holly finishes the exam and tries her damnedest not to laugh at Trelawny, because her trick was just so funny of course, when we get the prediction. This freaks out Holly, who goes running back to tell Sirius about it. She arrives just in time to see him, Blaise, and Malfoy looking at the Marauders’ Map. Peter Pettigrew is in Hagid’s Hut and…why? If he left the grounds, why the fuck would he come back? What the hell is this, I don’t even…GAH!
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AN: Yes, I gave Blaise's little brother a very bizarre name, but then, everyone in his family has an odd one. I named him after both a famous professor and a scientist to go with the intellectual theme of Blaise and Dante.
ZeldaQueen: X-MEN DON’T COUNT!
On a more serious note, why would the pureblood, Old Name Zabinis name their son after famous Muggle people?
Also, I am finally finished with college! Hooray! I now just have to finish grad school. Not-so-hooray!
ZeldaQueen: I still can’t believe you’re a college senior. It’s people like you and Stephenie Meyer who are lowering the literary bar
And I've already started on the next chapter. I am trying to finish it before my sister and I leave for our week in the Bahamas at in the middle of May.
ZeldaQueen: Shoot me
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Onward to: Chapter 37: Cave Canem
Back to: Chapter 35: C'est la Vie
Return to: Table of Contents