(no subject)
They say that you should never have to bury a child. They weren't lying.
Yesterday Jonathan dug the hole for Zach's grave and then he came back to shower and get us for his burial. After the ceremony was over Andrew said he wanted to help put the dirt back in and Jonathan said "I saw this coming". So Andrew went over behind Jonathan and "helped" hold the shovel to put the dirt back in (which hindered Jonathan's movements but he didn't complain about it). After about a minute Andrew, in a slight whine, asked how long it was going to take and without missing a beat Jonathan said "About twice as long as it normally would". Father of the year, right there.
Having my kids there helped. I didn't expect anything from them except that they'd be themselves and that would be enough to get me through and it was. They are such a joy, and so funny. It's hard, because on the one hand it reminds me of what I've lost in Zach's death, but on the other, I am still so very blessed to have had him at all. It was also good having Reina and Tom there. They wrangled for us (Tom especially went chasing after Luke several times). It was good having their support. They've been family for so long that they are family.
Anyway, we're leaving for PA in a few hours. The family there is very stressed with all the drama surrounding Nanny. Pappy (who can't really take care of himself) wants her to come home and it's just not good. I'm really not up for much more than what's on my own plate, but I am looking forward to seeing Nanny again. She slept most of the time we were there last.
Yesterday Jonathan dug the hole for Zach's grave and then he came back to shower and get us for his burial. After the ceremony was over Andrew said he wanted to help put the dirt back in and Jonathan said "I saw this coming". So Andrew went over behind Jonathan and "helped" hold the shovel to put the dirt back in (which hindered Jonathan's movements but he didn't complain about it). After about a minute Andrew, in a slight whine, asked how long it was going to take and without missing a beat Jonathan said "About twice as long as it normally would". Father of the year, right there.
Having my kids there helped. I didn't expect anything from them except that they'd be themselves and that would be enough to get me through and it was. They are such a joy, and so funny. It's hard, because on the one hand it reminds me of what I've lost in Zach's death, but on the other, I am still so very blessed to have had him at all. It was also good having Reina and Tom there. They wrangled for us (Tom especially went chasing after Luke several times). It was good having their support. They've been family for so long that they are family.
Anyway, we're leaving for PA in a few hours. The family there is very stressed with all the drama surrounding Nanny. Pappy (who can't really take care of himself) wants her to come home and it's just not good. I'm really not up for much more than what's on my own plate, but I am looking forward to seeing Nanny again. She slept most of the time we were there last.