(no subject)
today has been a pretty horrible day, which is partly my fault.
joey and i went to state farm to sign up for my insurance and it ended up being almost $1000 every six months. how the fuck am i going to pay that? there's no way. i could get rid of collision coverage and then just pay like 380 every six months, but with my luck and my life, something terrible will happen and i'll hit something and be royally screwed. i also don't need another reason to be terrified of driving.
we went to get lunch at the restaurant after because we were starving and explained everything to my dad. of course he said nothing. ya know, i don't know one single person my age who pays for their own car insurance...or they're phone bill for that matter. i can't decide what i hate more: the fact that my parents don't care about me enough to help me out like everyone else's parents or the fact that everyone i know are bums and should really man the fuck up and pay for shit themselves and eave their poor struggling parents alone when it comes to money.
anyway, i had to pay like $500 today and i have to pay the rest of the insurance in 2 months. FUCK. i have no money. literally. no fucking money. and neither does joey. i have to have him put my taxes and fees for the dmv on his credit card. we are so screwed right now. by friday, we will both have between $0 and $2 in our bank accounts and we don't get paid til next friday. awesome.
in other news, his sister has been trying to get an $8,000 loan for a car. she has gone to every single bank in rochester, one by one, and been denied. the last one was HSBC and they approved her today. wow. they are fucking idiots, first of all. there is no way she has that kind of money. in fact, i know she doesn't. secondly, it is driving me insane. why does everything always seem to work out for everyone else, except me? everything in my life seems to go wrong. i am the PERFECT example of murphy's law. she doesn't deserve this. not to mention the fact that i hate her so much. you don't understand. there is only one person in their world that i hate more than her (which is my old step dad). it's really not healthy to have this much hate inside me, but i can't help it. it's her fault i feel this way and i don't feel badly or guilty about it at all. i hate her so much. i cannot wait for her to get her comeuppance. if there is any justice or karma in this world, it will happen and it will hit her hard. i just hope i'm around to see it.
oh and by the way, now joey is pissed at me. see, yesterday his mom asked him to cosign a loan for his sister and he said no. well, he took her to the bank today and i asked if he cosigned, just to make sure, and he said no and that there was no way he would have done that. then i said i thought that if his family pushed hard enough, i think he would have done it. and he just got super pissed and won't talk to me now. well, i'm sorry, but he wouldn't even stand up for me against his sister because she was going to get mad at him. can you really blame me for thinking that? is it really my fault? i think not. he is willing to do almost anything to keep his family happy and it's not even like i said this to him in a mean way either. he is overreacting as usual, but i kind of think he's more mad because i would think that way of him. sorry, but i didn't make it up all by myself.
uggggggggh.
fuck everything. fuck money. fuck insurance. fuck cars. fuck my "parents." fuck my job. fuck my boss. fuck my fucking life. fuck fuck fuck.
joey and i went to state farm to sign up for my insurance and it ended up being almost $1000 every six months. how the fuck am i going to pay that? there's no way. i could get rid of collision coverage and then just pay like 380 every six months, but with my luck and my life, something terrible will happen and i'll hit something and be royally screwed. i also don't need another reason to be terrified of driving.
we went to get lunch at the restaurant after because we were starving and explained everything to my dad. of course he said nothing. ya know, i don't know one single person my age who pays for their own car insurance...or they're phone bill for that matter. i can't decide what i hate more: the fact that my parents don't care about me enough to help me out like everyone else's parents or the fact that everyone i know are bums and should really man the fuck up and pay for shit themselves and eave their poor struggling parents alone when it comes to money.
anyway, i had to pay like $500 today and i have to pay the rest of the insurance in 2 months. FUCK. i have no money. literally. no fucking money. and neither does joey. i have to have him put my taxes and fees for the dmv on his credit card. we are so screwed right now. by friday, we will both have between $0 and $2 in our bank accounts and we don't get paid til next friday. awesome.
in other news, his sister has been trying to get an $8,000 loan for a car. she has gone to every single bank in rochester, one by one, and been denied. the last one was HSBC and they approved her today. wow. they are fucking idiots, first of all. there is no way she has that kind of money. in fact, i know she doesn't. secondly, it is driving me insane. why does everything always seem to work out for everyone else, except me? everything in my life seems to go wrong. i am the PERFECT example of murphy's law. she doesn't deserve this. not to mention the fact that i hate her so much. you don't understand. there is only one person in their world that i hate more than her (which is my old step dad). it's really not healthy to have this much hate inside me, but i can't help it. it's her fault i feel this way and i don't feel badly or guilty about it at all. i hate her so much. i cannot wait for her to get her comeuppance. if there is any justice or karma in this world, it will happen and it will hit her hard. i just hope i'm around to see it.
oh and by the way, now joey is pissed at me. see, yesterday his mom asked him to cosign a loan for his sister and he said no. well, he took her to the bank today and i asked if he cosigned, just to make sure, and he said no and that there was no way he would have done that. then i said i thought that if his family pushed hard enough, i think he would have done it. and he just got super pissed and won't talk to me now. well, i'm sorry, but he wouldn't even stand up for me against his sister because she was going to get mad at him. can you really blame me for thinking that? is it really my fault? i think not. he is willing to do almost anything to keep his family happy and it's not even like i said this to him in a mean way either. he is overreacting as usual, but i kind of think he's more mad because i would think that way of him. sorry, but i didn't make it up all by myself.
uggggggggh.
fuck everything. fuck money. fuck insurance. fuck cars. fuck my "parents." fuck my job. fuck my boss. fuck my fucking life. fuck fuck fuck.