20 letters from you Chapter 1 part 2
Title - 20 letters from you Part 2
Chapter- 1/?
Pairing- Suzaku X Lelouch
Rating- Pg- NC17ish later
Author- ME
The 2nd letter…
The thunder tore its way through the windows ringing out through the empty corridors. Zero sat there at his desk; his eyes closed; his head flopped back silently listening to the rain drops hitting the windows and the thunder roaring into his ear.
Strangely enough the empress had no functions today; which was a sigh of relief because of…
A) The weather and B) She had fallen ill.
Nothing too serious; just a mild fever. Zero had sat by her bed all morning and afternoon; hoping to help her as much as he could. However she wouldn’t ask for anything and would just softly smile at him from time to time. However he did go out a few times to make a cup of tea for her; he knew how much she loved a cup of tea. He even knew what she liked; 2 small teaspoons of sugar; with a dash of milk and cream. Of course he would know; he was Zero. Anyway he stayed by her side until she fell asleep; however before drifting off she whispered;
“Ne…do you miss him…suza…”
Before he could respond; she fell asleep and Zero softly smiled at her;
“Yeah…terribly…”
He opened his eyes and swung his head forward looking at the blank sheet of paper; it had been a week since he had received that letter from him.
He said he would come for me…when is that exactly…?
He pressed the pen against his lips pondering his thoughts. What should I write…?
Taking a deep breath his pen began to write in his homeland written language which was nearly extinct.
Nunally’s ill at the moment; nothing too serious it’s just a mild fever. I’ve been taking good care of her like if I was her brother. Well I know I can’t replace her ‘onii-sama’…
It’s raining today; actually it’s a thunderstorm. I remember how scared you use to be of thunder when we were kids. You’d always cling to me…do you remember?
He suddenly stopped and ran his fingers through his hair; sighing deeply. His mind for once wasn’t thinking it was blank; empty. At that moment he just closed his eyes letting himself be lost for once in his mind.
He suddenly remembered; “The letter…” He reached for the drawer and took it out and began reading it. He had been doing that quite a lot recently; trying to assure himself that this was all real and not some hallucination.
“Nope…it’s still here…”
He smiled and gazed at the letter; this letter made him happy; euphoric.
“Eh?”
He felt his phone vibrate and he slowly flipped it open;
“Hai.”
“Zero-Sama; you have a visitor to see you.”
“A visitor?”
His eyes widened; L-Lelouch?!
“Hai…”
“I’m on my way.”
And with that he hung up.
He slipped back on his Zero suit and put his helmet on; even if it was Lelouch he had to remain professional and wear this all the time when around other people. Suzaku was killed…remember?
A knock…
Zero’s eyes widened and he faced the door. Didn’t he say he’d be right down?
“E-Enter…”
The door slowly opened.
“Ano…Zero-sama?”
His eyes widened it was Kallen and Gino.
He was disappointed but in a way happy. He hadn’t seen these two in a while; about half a year to be exact.
“Is her majesty okay?”
Zero; cold and silent, nodded.
They both simultaneously sighed. “That’s good…”
It was silent for a moment and Zero felt his patience wearing thin; “What do I owe the pleasure…”
Kallen visibly jumped and look at him. Zero didn’t say anything else and just stared at them.
“O-Oh right…erm two things…one…”
She reached into her bag and began searching for something; Zero remained motionless whilst Gino began scratching his head looking noticeably awkward. Looking at Gino he noticed how much he had changed after the black rebellion. Once laid back and care free to being this cold, serious man. Who was this person? This wasn’t the Gino he…no Suzaku knew.
“Erm…Ah got it…here…”
Out came a candle with the words; ‘Lelouch’ carved into it. The candle was a deep blue/purple.
“It’s his death anniversary soon…so I thought we’d best give our respects…”
He smiled at the gesture and went to his table and placed it down. He then faced the two and nodded; full of gratitude. Kallen visibly smiled and then looked at Gino. Gino casually looked at her to find a sharp glare digging into his eyes.
“A-Ah right; and the second thing is…”
Gino walked closer and looked carefully at the motionless man.
“Suzaku…”
Zero’s eyes widened; Crap… CRAP.
He didn’t respond and just watched them.
Gino turned away and smiled softly;
“It’s also Suzaku’s birthday soon…can you remind her majesty for us…I bet he would have loved to receive a candle from her…”
“I…”
It’s me Gino…It’s me Kallen…I’m alive…
“I understand…”
Wait…
“Thanks…”
STOP IT!
Gino then began to walk away; with Kallen reluctantly following.
…Please tell them! Please! I don’t wanna be alone anymore!
And he turned away from the two visitors; watching the rain constantly pushing against the window. Suzaku was screaming at Zero; screaming at him. Telling him he had enough; he didn’t like being locked up behind this cape and mask, he wanted to have friends again. He wanted to be back in Ashford with everyone. Ignoring Suzaku he asked;
“Will you…give a candle to Kururugi-san?”
Gino stopped and sadly laughed; “Of course…he was my best friend after all…even if he decided to become Knight of Zero…”
Those words hit Suzaku hard; whilst Zero just nodded and then waved them off.
Gino, I’m sorry…
Zero closed his eyes and listened to the hesitant steps of Gino walking away and out of the room. The door creaked as it closed and shut with mild bang.
“He saw right through me…didn’t he?”
He exited his room and began walking trying to clear his mind. Gino forgave him; after all this time he was still his friend. Of course Suzaku was happy; of course he was happy that he was remembered and still loved.
However…why couldn’t he embrace it?
Ah…
Because he was no longer Suzaku…that’s why.
He looked up and found himself in front of her majesty’s door. He must have unconsciously walked there; maybe out of habit?
He sighed deeply and looked down. This was all a bit too much for him; after seeing Gino and Kallen for the first time in a while brought back memories; memories of that teenage boy who was stubborn and naïve.
What did I know…
He knocked gently on her door and called in a voice barely above a whisper;
“Are you awake your majesty?”
There was a long pause.
“Ah, Zero, come in.”
With that he opened the door and walked inside; into the warmth.
Her bed lamp was on; which shone a mild but striking light around the room, and she was sat up looking or reading a book of some sort.
He walked in quietly and swiftly sitting on the seat beside her bed; the one he always sat on. She was looking at pictures; smiling a poignant, reminiscing smile.
Zero watched her face carefully; not wanting to disturb her in her time of remembrance. Memories were really important for the both of them…especially Zero; they were the only thing which proved he once existed in life…or actually had a life.
“Ne…Zero was there anything you wanted to discuss with me?”
Zero hesitated; he did come in for a reason but somehow the reason just slipped away. Not knowing what to say he stayed quiet for a bit watching her eyes shimmering at certain pictures.
Nunally waited patiently; staring at the pictures which contained so much happiness yet so much sadness. She often wanted to say to Zero, Ne, do you remember when you, me and onii-sama did this? Or, that was funny; I still can’t believe you did that to onii-sama. However she knew he wouldn’t respond and would just watch her. She desperately wanted to see the face of the man behind the mask. His face was always hidden; therefore his true emotions were hidden at the same time. Was he crying at the moment? Was he smiling? Was he angry?
“Gino and Kallen came a minute ago…they brought the deceased emperor a candle…”
Nunally visibly flinched at his words but nonetheless Zero carried on; “They were also hoping you would get Suzaku a candle…they said they know he would like it…”
Nunally for the first time in the whole conversation actually looked at Zero. Her eyes showed sadness and remorse. Zero didn’t respond and just remained quiet and motionless staring at the empress.
“Suza…”
“…I’m Zero…”
“But…”
Zero then stood up, bowed and began walking away; however he suddenly felt hands grab his cape. His eyes widened and he stood still.
“Ne, It’s me Nunally; remember…your friend? Can’t you talk to me anymore?”
He didn’t respond and just stood there waiting for her to let go. They remained like that for what seemed like an eternity but actually was a minute or so; until she finally, reluctantly let go. In a flash he walked out of the empress room into the cold, dark corridors.
I’m remembered; I’m still remembered. I guess I’m happy…however why can’t I escape from this shell? Why can’t I be free to live a normal life? Ha…because I’m Zero that’s why…
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Suzaku;
Feed her some egg porridge, this always helps her to get better. I always use to make it for her when she got ill. How I miss those times…
It didn’t rain here thank god; to be honest I still am afraid. It’s scary the sounds it makes, thunder that is, it’s fierce like a beast. It’s worst to be honest, because I don’t have you to cling on to, when there’s a thunder storm.
I miss you, I want you…
I need you Suzaku, not Zero…
I’m waiting…
Lelouch
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http://xxtsubasaxx.livejournal.com/6184.html#cutid1 <--------- part 3a