fuck. fuck. fuck. why is everything not right?
its like im in opposite land or
at a tea party with the mad hatter.
fuck.
nothing is simple, nothing is easy.
i cant make anyone happy while im fully happy too.
Jesus. maybe im not meant to be here.
this is not a good place for me.
Damnit.

stop eating yourself silly!
*SMACK*

I hate feeling like im imposing on people. so here i am, alone. too afraid to swallow my pride. i guess i will suffer till i can. just want to feel needed again.

Ugh, im such a Debbie Downer.

my anxiety is getting bad. Still waiting for results. school is over, summer is here. england soon, just wanna go.

The doctor told me that it is normal for someone to intensely grieve and be depressed for about 8 months and anything longer than a year then needs more help. is that what i need? do i need someone to help me? i dont want that, i never liked the idea of a counselor or medication. tried it once and i dont want to do it again if i dont have to. ( Read more... )

I think im seen as a crazy woman these days. i just feel so emotional, i dont feel needed, i dont feel like im being listened to. i have felt like this before, and i always think its something to do with the people around me but it cant always be their fault, it has to be something im doing wrong. but what. i cant figure it out. i cant figure out ( Read more... )

I dont understand how i can just sit here for hours and hours at a time and do nothing. man, i suck.

definitely failing school. awesome. cant wait for the end of the semester. im scared.

I hate when things turn into, for a lack of a better term, a flaming bag of dog poop. Maybe there is a better term for that. oh well. so fun stuff happening RIGHT NOW. Passive aggressive fighting and arguments, being told i love attention from people, being told me relationship is for the most part; bad and i should re think things ( Read more... )

Hi, my name is Shay
and i really know how to fuck up
everything good that i have going for me.
So as a for warning, dont get involved with me
because i will most likely end up making things
hard and annoying for you.

Thank you me for being a dumb piece of shit.