(no subject)
i am trying to work on myself here.i am the farthest thing from perfect and i am aware of the things that pete and i do that hurt nate.when i opened up about using the 6th month of pregnancy it wasnt something i said matter-of-factly.it was humiliating because i am ashamed of what i did.the main problem with pete and i is that he loves me but has a distant personality,i on the other hand am emotionally needy.tension starts because i have bipolar that is extremely resistant to anti-depressants.i get very depressed and pete doesnt know how to deal with it and pushes me away and me being hypersensitive overreacts.
my son saved my life.i did relapse again after i had him but ultimately i am quitting for Nate(and myself).if i didnt have nate i would probably be nodding off somewhere in philly on the streets,unbathed and with dirty clothes OR i'd be in prison OR i wouldve ODed for the fourth time and not come back.
anyway,i dont need this.i now finally understand why alot of people have friends only journals.
so after this post,
THIS JOURNAL IS FRIENDS ONLY
my son saved my life.i did relapse again after i had him but ultimately i am quitting for Nate(and myself).if i didnt have nate i would probably be nodding off somewhere in philly on the streets,unbathed and with dirty clothes OR i'd be in prison OR i wouldve ODed for the fourth time and not come back.
anyway,i dont need this.i now finally understand why alot of people have friends only journals.
so after this post,
THIS JOURNAL IS FRIENDS ONLY