I have allowed the Army to teach me how to suppress my feelings, emotions, and any form of affection. I have unconsciously detached myself from any form of commitment in relationships. In any case where there may be a relationship budding, I immediately react with an action that will end it. I am incapable of giving and receiving compliments and ( Read more... )

cigarettes make me think alot.
also, my friend ordered an mpc out here, and that shit is siqqqqqq
i'm really thinking of getting into producing some shit and see where it goes.

as much as i try to be different from everyone else, i end up realizing that i am just as materialistic and sometimes as much of a dick as most of the douchebags in the army. i guess it comes with the job. i just can't wait to get back. i'm thinking too much.

I feel so fucked up from this deployment. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. Courtney and I broke up while I was at home. I just completely changed and didn't love her anymore. It makes me wonder about women in the future, I wonder if it will happen again. I have grown up the old-fashioned way, I came into the army young and unsure of ( Read more... )

if you weren't so shallow you could see that beneath all the flash and glitz and glamour of everyone else they are completely void of personality and responsibility. it's the same thing everytime, yet she won't get out of my head. i thought i was over her but seeing her the other night spawned jealousy and at the same time resent. but at least i ( Read more... )

i'm changing, and i wonder if i'm the only one who will notice. is it wrong to not want to see anybody when i go home? i just want to find a cave in the mountains and drink myself to sleep and forget i was ever here.

sometimes i resent everything and everyone for not making the dumbass decision that i did.

also, is it bad if i just want to live free?

saying "this place sucks" is an understatement. this is the worst thing anyone should have to go through. i'm so sick of this bullshit already ( Read more... )

they gave us a huge bottle of "malaria" pills. they made us bring them over to them and watch us take one. once they stop watching us take them i'm not gonna take that shit anymore. shit's ridiculous

1. i fuckin hate politics ( Read more... )